No, the elitist/arrogant attitude has been a problem for him for some time, and is some of what led to believing he didn't have to follow school, family or governmental rules. I don't think it is a good thing and he still is working on it. It is not a trait his other family members have. He knows it offends a lot of people, but for some reason, a lot of his peers put up with it. It made Carlbrook staff crazy.
I wonder if in the case of Carlbrook what he objected to were rules which did not have any logical point. Adults have to follow rules largely so that others dont get hurt. But they dont get "banned" from reading or making particular friendships, or have to confess their most shameful things to people they just met.
To an extent i get why the parent of a kid who is mildly criminal eg stealing, involved in vandalism, stealing the family car is concerned about the idea that their kid lacks respect for others property. It is also difficult to teach a kid about this when you are reasonably affluent. But it is not as if either wilderness or TBS is morally pure on this score given the amount of profit it makes from families in crisis. A reasonably smart kid must be able to figure this out. If anything if i were one of these kids the first thought toward my minders would be that my behaviour is paying your wages so go fuck yourself you 2 bit facist.
I would sooner see my kids be made to do some kind of volunteer work which forced them to learn something about the wider world, and the genuine hardships that people go through by being made do something humanitarian. How can any kid be expected to learn empathy if they are in a place which is designed to continually dwell on all that is wrong with them until they either become hardened or in need of rebuilding?
ZTo charlie- if you had your time over with your son what would you do differently to teach him the empathy you feel he lacked?