some of you members of very sick and need some serious help. Sick Sick People
If you are right, then you have to ask yourself how they got to be like that.
But look at the bottom line: What is the case here?
We have a 14 year old girl. She is trying to act like an adult and make adult decisions like most teenagers. Some decisions are good and some bad.
The parents are properly at my age and were teenagers during the 70's and 80's.
The world did not look like the world today back then. That we regarded as fact and boundaries are not existing today. The fact that I can write this is proof enough. There were no internet back then. There were no cell-phones. Naugty messages were passed in the classes to other children the parents could see. Not a stranger in another town or another country. Back in my days we had to buy porn in a shop where our parent could be either a customer or a employee. Now it is a click away and with parents busy doing their own job, none is around to tell the child if BDSM is like things should be normally done or a hobby for the few.
So the parents of this girl do have good reasons to be worried. They do not know how the life of a teenager is today and because your country have criminalized some of the normal teenager stuff, the parents can not go for a walk to the place where all the city knows that youth hangs out and drink to talk to their child.
So they turn to the so-called profs. And when money comes into the picture, someone is getting rich at their expense. That is not the worst part. The worst part is that they are actually kept from the solution. The solution is communication. Undisturbed communication!
Among all the programs, there are offered, only one type is useful when we are talking normal teenager behavior. That is family therapy programs.
The case is that the child is lying. Where did she get it from? From the parent. If you are a parent (I am), you will properly have lied to your child already (I have done that. "A mouse have eaten the chocolate" was my answer to my 3 year old daughter at the time. A couple of years later was it her answer to me.)
Some may argue that family therapy can be done at home and for the most part it is true. But are you really at peace in your own house. Do you not answer your phone, cell-phone or email? I do.
So the next-best thing is to go to a remote place where you can get some kind of support because you as parent is too close to the situation and you are not updated. This girls parents were not updated. They also need support and perhaps even at much treatment as the girls does - maybe even more.
The girl is also stealing and that should be regarded as sign that she is asking for help. Something in her life is so painful that she can not speak about it. Are there other signs? Is she cutting herself on the top of it, so some of the pain can go away? This is clearly a question about the parents being able to listen and learn.
So I recommended the only program Aspen had, that is not abusive by nature: The family program.
It is the only program that can be stopped at any time because the parents can leave if they or their child are violated. Better solutions could be at hand, but it demands that the parents for once are able to cut all the disturbance from the daily life away for the time that is needed and I do not think that they are able to achieve that in their home.
What do you think that they should do?
