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Author Topic: Bill Valentine's applogoy  (Read 6023 times)

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Offline Anonymous

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Bill Valentine's applogoy
« on: November 06, 2007, 08:46:52 PM »
in hopes of spreading healing in some way:

Alia:

First, I, too, have had to learn and grow from my CEDU experience. The verbal abuse that was modeled to us as new staff was too easily emulated and reinforced as we, staff and students alike went through the poorly conceived and dreadfully executed emotional “growthâ€
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Offline try another castle

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Bill Valentine's applogoy
« Reply #1 on: November 06, 2007, 10:12:57 PM »
I don't know what this guy was like, but it seems like a pretty decent, stand-up gesture. Not too self-serving. Validating that the program was inherently flawed, sincere-sounding apology. Maybe I'm being optimistic?
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Offline Anonymous

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Bill Valentine's applogoy
« Reply #2 on: November 06, 2007, 10:50:07 PM »
Having known Bill in my time at Cedu RS (91-93), I'd say the apology is sincere.
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Offline dishdutyfugitive

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Bill Valentine's applogoy
« Reply #3 on: November 07, 2007, 10:44:38 AM »
I think it's a good start.
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Offline blownawaytheidahoway

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Re: Bill Valentine's applogoy
« Reply #4 on: November 07, 2007, 01:44:42 PM »
Quote from: "alia23"
The verbal abuse that was modeled to us as new staff was too easily emulated and reinforced as we, staff and students alike went through the poorly conceived and dreadfully executed emotional “growthâ€
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Life is a very wonderful thing.\' said Dr. Branom... \'The processes of life, the make- up of the human organism, who can fully understand these miracles?... What is happening to you now is what should happen to any normal healthy human organism...You are being made sane, you are being made healthy.
     \'That I will not have, \' I said, \'nor can understand at all. What you\'ve been doing is to make me feel very very ill.\'
                         -Anthony Burgess
                      A Clockwork Orange

Offline dishdutyfugitive

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Bill Valentine's applogoy
« Reply #5 on: November 07, 2007, 01:53:55 PM »
Alia Please forward to Bill


Bill,

You said the following:
"It has taken a long time for me to secure the necessary training and study to realize how misguided were my attempts at bringing emotional health to the kids at CEDU."

Looking back on it do you remember saying to yourself "This is wrong"?  I don't see how you need training and study to realize this. Please explain.
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Offline try another castle

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Bill Valentine's applogoy
« Reply #6 on: November 07, 2007, 11:29:36 PM »
Quote
Looking back on it do you remember saying to yourself "This is wrong"? I don't see how you need training and study to realize this. Please explain.


I know. We certainly didn't have such a luxury, and we seemed to figure it out for ourselves for the most part after a few years.


Besides, I honestly didn't even realize that "unfucking yourself" was a major at any college.


Still, I gotta give him some props. He just still has a ways to go. That's understandable.
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Offline Anonymous

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Bill Valentine's applogoy
« Reply #7 on: November 08, 2007, 02:25:24 AM »
yeah, i hate to say this but truly, in the defense of the staff, it is way harder to get over that shit if you are older, like he was like 45 when he went there, totally subconciously traumatic.  a person who grew up in a culture his whole life where he is told he is not allowed to cry, a human need, a human function, and then met with a place to cry for the first time maybe (i am not just thinking of bill now, i am thinking of all the new staff as they got there, told they didnt have to invest thousands of dollars to educate themselves in order to help children, they could 'start today' and help there) and have that first allowance of human emotion be set within that madhouse.  

its like a preist, having his first orgasm with a young child, at the suggestion of an older preist.

its fucked up, its nasty, but we should never be without compassion, thats what i try to live with, what i wanted was to know that he was moving in a different direction.  making sure the preists have stopped fucking the choir boys is a good start.  and in bill's defense specifically it is much harder to change when you are older, so if he went in and had the strength go come out at all at that age, thats pretty good.

our world is so crazy, huh.   craaazy weird.
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Offline Anonymous

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Bill Valentine's applogoy
« Reply #8 on: November 08, 2007, 03:11:35 AM »
but still, they all should have known better.
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Offline Anonymous

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Bill Valentine's applogoy
« Reply #9 on: November 08, 2007, 10:35:10 AM »
Interesting!!! I also got a very humble tearful and sincere apology form Rudy Bentz.
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Offline Anonymous

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yeah, but...
« Reply #10 on: November 08, 2007, 10:39:42 AM »
Did Rudy simply apologize or something he did or said to you or did he have an understanding of the SYSTEMIC fallacies (abuse) of the program?
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Offline try another castle

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Bill Valentine's applogoy
« Reply #11 on: November 08, 2007, 04:05:37 PM »
Quote from: ""sugarmag""
Interesting!!! I also got a very humble tearful and sincere apology form Rudy Bentz.


You're shitting me, right? Is today opposite day?


I wonder if they are both working the eighth step or something?


Is there ever a reason to send an apology letter after this long unless you are only doing it to exorcise your own demons? I mean, does the person you are apologizing to really want to hear from you?


Anyone here remember  your first home visit? Remember how we had to "set things right" and make amends for all of the apparently fucked up shit we did before we got shipped off to strength-through-joy vacation? And we had to get it done in the four short days we were home? (two of those spent traveling.)

I basically had to return a bunch of stuff that I stole. The steppenwolf Monster album that I swiped from my 8th grade teacher. (really just borrowed and forgot to return.) The bridgeman book on anatomy that I stole from my 9th grade teacher. (and that was a legitimate swipe.) A set of wimmin's comix I borrowed from my friend my sophomore year. Most of these people hadn't seen me anywhere from 2-4 years.

I always wondered what my friend Diana thought about that. All of the sudden she gets all of her comic books in the mail, that she probably forgot about, with a very brief note from me saying "Sorry I never got these back to you. I have been away for a while."

That would have definitely earned a what.the.fuck in my book.

I'd give anything to be able to touch base with her again. She was a really good friend.

...and those were some great fucking comics, too. That's where I first saw Phoebe Gloeckner's work, who was, is and always will be one of my favorite artists/writers/auteurs... Plus, she's as gorgeous as she is brilliant. :oops:

Well, at least I stole (or borrowed and forgot to return) with purpose. Most things that I found to be worth swiping (besides 20s out of my mom's purse) had to do with one of my two passions, music and art.

The steppenwolf LP was a bonus, because not only did it have the music, it had one of the coolest album covers I had ever seen. I remember spending a really long time trying to copy it line for line.
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Offline Anonymous

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Bill Valentine's applogoy
« Reply #12 on: November 08, 2007, 07:48:47 PM »
yeah, sorry, he didnt send me that just out of the blue.  i wrote to him and told him if you plan to respond to this it had better be an apology or you can just not write back.


he did not just send that to me randomly....  sorry if i didnt give u guys enough info on that one.  sometimes i do that without realizing, u know, not give enough info... but no, he did not just send that to me one day, i contacted him on impulse and out of anger in many ways, and in to see if he had changed his mind or not, i had heard that he had.

i have no intention of looking up or soliciting appologies from rudy.  fuck that prick.  i never hated anyone so much in my life.  i never hated anyone so much in my entire life as i hate rudy benz.  he is an evil man.

but maybe he's changed, i shouldnt be so filled with hate, its tiring.
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Offline psy

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Re: Bill Valentine's applogoy
« Reply #13 on: November 09, 2007, 12:11:36 AM »
Quote from: "alia23"
in hopes of spreading healing in some way:

Alia:

First, I, too, have had to learn and grow from my CEDU experience. The verbal abuse that was modeled to us as new staff was too easily emulated and reinforced as we, staff and students alike went through the poorly conceived and dreadfully executed emotional “growthâ€
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Offline Son Of Serbia

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To Alia
« Reply #14 on: November 11, 2007, 10:47:30 AM »
Quote from: ""alia23""

i have no intention of looking up or soliciting appologies from rudy.  fuck that prick.  i never hated anyone so much in my life.  i never hated anyone so much in my entire life as i hate rudy benz.  he is an evil man.



Hello Alia. I was in your peer group and I remember you.  
I couldn't agree with you more about Rudy Bentz.  Rudy
is a MAGGOT.  He doesn't deserve our compassion, understanding, or forgiveness.  Rudy only deserves to
be treated with the same degradation & cruelty which
he so enthusiastically visited upon all of us during our
respective stays at cedu.  Never feel guilty for hating
this man, because even our hatred is too good for a
piece of shit like Rudy Bentz!

As for Rudy's apology: it is worthless. Rudy crossed the
line beyond where "I'm Sorry" cuts it decades ago.  
Maybe Rudy has finally reached that point in his life
where his past is catching up to him. Maybe the fact
that CEDU is dead, Jill left him, and that he has no
friends is starting to sink in.  Rudy is old now, old and
alone with nothing but his guilt.  Funny thing about guilt:
once you have it, if you can't find a way to get rid of it
(make amends), it tends to grow and it feels worse and
worse over time.  Rudy may be apologizing now, in
hopes of receiving forgiveness to relieve his guilt.  
Don't give that shitbag the satisfaction!  Instead leave
Rudy alone to face the demons of his past, to wallow in
the depravity and emptiness that defines his pathetic life.  
Under such dire circumstances, we can all but hope that
Rudy elects to do the rest of the world a favor, and blow
his own brains out.  Now that would be sweet justice!

As for Bill Valentine, he was not the sadist that Rudy Bentz,  
Jill Bentz, Guy Bonnano, Patrick Stambusky, Russ Decker,
& Steve Laird were .  True, Bill played by Cedu's rules,
but he wasn't cruel about it, at least not to me anyways. Bill
treated me fairly, much more so than any of the other "family heads" at Cedu.  Based on my own personal experience
with Bill Valentine, I would agree that his apology to Alia is
indeed sincere.  Good for you Bill, I always knew you were
better than the rest of them.
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