Fornits

Fornits Home for Wayward Web Fora
An open discussion about the troubled parent industry

her friends think he is "emo"

That is a term my daughter uses ... she says it is more a definition of someone's emotional state.  Sort of melancholy ... introspective ... almost depressed sort of personality.

She said it can refer to a certain 'style' also.  Sorta a cross between punk rock and goth.  

Based on those descriptors ... I do believe my own daughter went through an emo phase.  

So what have you done to help kids?

I think the first place to start is by having intelligent conversations with parents who have either placed kids or who are considering it.

Just for arguments sake lets consider this scenario:  a parent who is considering a placement peruses the web for program info.  That parent stumbles in the Fornits Forum and begins reading threads like this one or any of a number of other ridiculous posts.  Is that parent going to take any worthwhile information from such an experience?  Probably not.

The trouble is that there is very valuable experience and information on this site, but it is often hidden behind such superfluous posts as "Niles wants to fuck a program mom".  Actually it's not just hidden ... it's obliterated.

How in the name of all that is intelligent, does that kind of discourse help kids?

Ya wanna help kids?  Reach their parents with your stories ... your information and resources.  Stop the immature shock and awe posts.  It is neither shocking or awe inspiring.  It's a waste.

My daughter used KoolAid once to color her hair.  It took quite a long time to wash out and her pillowcase was a nice shade of cherry.  I wouldn't recommend coloring the dog as funny as it would be ... I think he would leave traces of color wherever he lay.

One summer in high school I went to a two week long cheer leading camp.  It was very competitive.  The girls were very cut throat.  Too many politics that I just didn't understand.  My team frowned on me if I ate more that 300 or 400 calories a day.  Had to keep up the anorexic body image.  Well toward the end of the camp I came down very sick.  High fever.  Ear ache.  Body aches.  I went to the camp nurse who told me I had an acute inner ear infection and needed to go home and get on antibiotics.   My squad made every threat short of death if I left.  They needed me for the final competition.

I stayed.  I was absolutely miserable and ended up with a burst eardrum.  

The pressure was so immense.  By peers and by staff.

It was a horrible experience.  I didn't go out for the squad my senior year.  The summer camp experience ruined what should have been a healthy normal high school sport.

There is such pressure on kids to perform in the sport arena.

Personally I think we are eternal beings.  I believe there is more to us than just organic material.  There is a spiritual component as well.  And I think that this spiritual part of us continues on ...

When my grandfather was dying (of lung cancer) he would have moments where he had 'visions' of things that were quite clearly not 'earthly'.  It was beautiful ... scary ... surreal.  But, his experience was clearly real to him.

It was that experience that has left me believing there is more out there than meets the human eye.

Seems that Struggling Teens are back in the forum business.  Seems they are only allowing a select few back into the fold.  Seems I am not among the elect.  I was welcomed back with the following message:

Sorry, either your membership has not yet been approved or the board administrators have removed your ability to post to this board. We cannot allow you to perform this action as a result.

Well now ... this is interesting.

I actually caught this on TV a few weeks back.  It was most WEIRD!!  I remember thinking that most adolescent girls would be very uncomfortable with the idea of daddy knowing about her sexuality or lack thereof.

Most of the girls appeared to like the idea that daddy was her knight in shining armor so to speak.  That he was the protector of her virginity.  

I am all for dads being a very integral part of their daughters lives.  Studies show that girls who have warm healthy relationships with their dads tend to be less promiscuous and more fulfilled in their relationships once they are of age.  I am all for abstinence before marriage too.  But, this was so over the top ... I almost got the feeling of incestuousness.

It was creepy.