I think you're missing the point wondering, and program parent looking for alternatives.
These programs are abusive by their very nature. They have to be to accomplish what they intend - a person who has had their thinking and behavior modified against their will; i.e. Brainwashed.
All these programs make use of sleep depravation; hunger; fear; abandonment; hopelessness and humiliation to soften the teens up for "modifying". This is a brutal process that inflicts psychic trauma sufficient to more or less guarantee PTSD as a consequence.
On a superficial level it can appear to have "worked" . But the damaged done is festering underneath and will eventually come to the surface. It seem to take roughly 5 years.
Furthermore, what the parents often don't realize is that the appearance of improved behavior is the result of the teens having learned better how to hide what they're up to. Naturally, they are older. Often living on their own. Often the drug use and irresponsible sex is far greater after, than prior to the Program. In other words - it doesn't work to effect positive change.
What is does do is assure a struggle with all the symptoms of PTSD, to one degree or another, for years to follow. It will damage if not devastate the parent child relationship. All those promises of a healed family are bogus.
You'd be amazed at how many of the devoted program faithful who swear the program saved them and their family haven't see or spoken to their child in years. Start asking. Ask them if their child is home yet. Often they make this claim while the teen is still in the program. They can't actually know what kind of effect the program has had. The kid is in a position where they dare not say anything negative. The whole thing is a facade.
In other cases, the teen is out; has been out for years maybe. But they never speak to or visit their parents. Still, the parents will swear the program saved them. They too are perpetrating a lie. They have no idea how their child is doing.
In some cases they do know. They know she is pregnant and can't say which of the several men they have been with might be the dad. They are still using a mix of substances that are harmful to them and the baby. They are making a living in some manner that is not exactly "legitimate". But the parent is still working "their" program. Still insisting it is the greatest thing they ever did. Still swearing it was a success, and that when the teen / young adult decides to use the tools the program gave them they will be fine.
Have you heard the term "Living in a fool's paradise"? There you have the mind set of the pitiful programmed.
You want to know what works? Well, natural consequences can work. Not the un-natural wildly exaggerated consequences used in these programs; but natural consequences. As parents, maybe you shouldn't rush to intervene as often as you no doubt do when the kids screw up and loose a valued item or position at school or on the job.
You shouldn't live in dread of them spending a night or two in jail. This might well do them some good. Ironically a couple nights in jail can have a far more positive effect than a couple years in one of these programs.
If they are hungry b/c they spent their paycheck on booze or pot; feed them. They need sustenance to be able to return to health. But you need not buy them a pizza. A jar of Jiffy and a loaf of bread and a gallon of milk will do. Maybe a bag of pinto beans and a ham hock; with instructions, so they don't break their teeth on dry beans while stoned out of their stupid gourds.
If they are still in your home then set reasonable rules you can both live with. Don't be so strict and unreasonable they are provoked to rebel. And have the consequences be something you are willing and able to implement.
If they are so out of control that they are endangering you and their siblings and themselves you are probably dealing with a mental illness; and these programs are the very worst thing you could possibly do to a person with a mental illness. You may well destroy them utterly if you send them into such a place. They need skilled and appropriate therapy and maybe some help with medication.
If your insurance company denies this care fight them. You can win. But you'll have to educate yourself and be willing to put some real time and effort into the battle.
If your dealing with a mental illness you need to face that fact and do your best to be a help and support, so your child has some chance at recovery. If you force them into a harsh and brutal program with demands and rules that are designed to be impossible for even "normal" teens to manage, you will very likely be subjecting them to never ending assault and humiliation of the kind that would drive anyone insane.
If your dealing with substance abuse issues of a truly worrisome nature - I'd suggest getting a copy of Recovery Options, co-authored by Maia Szalavitz.. Its an excellent book describing the various options that have been proven effective; explain what they each are, who might benifit from them, how they work, and so on.
But again, its important for you to understand, these Syanon based programs do not work. All that makes it appear helpful is a facade that will crumble and fade. The true effects are of a destructive, even devastating nature. This is not propaganda. It is just the truth.
Brain washing requires breaking the mind; and then putting it back together. If you'll read Ken Kay's own comments concerning what they do, you'll see him describing breaking them down to build them back. This is brain washing. You can not do this with out the kind of stress and trauma I spoke of eariler. And, you can not do this with leaving a lot of cracks, that will one day crumble. And on occasion, you can't put them back together at all. These are the poor souls who fall through the program's "acceptable window of loss".
Please, educate yourself with regard to what you are actually paying huge sums of money to have done to your children.
