Treatment Abuse, Behavior Modification, Thought Reform > The Seed Discussion Forum
Another 73/74 Seedling Grad
Stripe:
Well, if it seems that on the seed discussion forum it's still the same old same old for seedlings, that's because it is. There's really only a couple of ways to handle the factual information you will learn about The Seed when you actaully read it in context and believe it some 30 years later.
Faithful, true Seedlings come here and are amazed that people were hurt and are "still" agonizing over the experience. Most seedlings staying true to their programming will say I should just get over it, stop hurting, stop being angry, stop expressing feelings that cause other's doubt and make them uncomfortable because my contrary feelings are not important to the well-being of the group.....
Thanks for the helpful hint - about as helpful in real life as telling someone you know and love that you don't want to talk to them anymore because they LOOK like a druggie, or a bank teller who miscounts your money, or the bag boy who breaks your eggs...
Please do not fail to see that the distress most people feel upon coming to this place is caused by awakening to the facts of the mistreatment received while we were there.
As for any measured rate of failure vs. success between true seedlings and those who openly reject the teachings? We all have successes and failures in life. I think it's just as stupid to blame those shortfalls on a person's failure to engage the programming "tools" as it is to give the seed programming credit for all of the success and happiness in your life.
When your life view hinges on programmed perceptions, you take yourself right out of the mix and you are no longer personally responsible for the results on either side of the equation.
"If it wasn't for the seed I'd be deadinsaneorinjail." Geeze, that's such a lie. I was made insane by that place, nearly killed myself trying to overcome the programming and resided in my own jail trying to live within the confines of the programming.
When seedlings begin to question the techniques used to make them compliant and straight individuals, well - there is usually one several reactions:
1. Some people are frightened by the realization of how controlled they were and they retreat into their safe confortable mindsets and refuse to accept the challenge of growing up a bit more. It's hard realizing and accepting that you have had a hand in your own emotional rape - or that you have hurt other's along your path and quest for seed-like perfection.
2. Some people get angry and become zealots on the other side of the equation fighting and lashing out at people around them, trying in vain to awaken themselves and others - that would be me. And as time passes, I become less angry and more reflective, but a zealot nonetheless. Poke poke.
3. Some people still spout the company line about how "fucked up" they were, how they didn't love themselves,etc., etc., etc., - you have all sat through the I-was-a-bad-ungrateful-motherfucker-before-the-seed routine. It's said with a vengence and as a means of protection. Kind of like sticking your fingers in your ears and then screaming Na-nana-na-na-na-na like little kids do when we tell them something they don't want to hear.
Will we, collectively, ever reconcile all this? Maybe. But one has to realize that the seed, I think in more cases that we are willing or able to admit, has stunted us all at some point in time. Some will make it, some will not.
It stunted me emotionally and I was stuck in that place for many, many years, using those tools. And I tried everything to get over it - 12 stepping for Ala-non, ACOA, support groups, church, yoga, spiritualism, eastern pholosophy, western philosophy, sex, drugs and even punk rock and roll. I really did try it all looking for the reasons for the intense feelings of rage, emptiness, self-loathing, sorrow and shame. Quite a nasty handful tolug around for 30+ years, but ya gotta do what ya gotta do.
But not until I understood the truth of the seed's program (the hows and whys) did I understand that I was not living my heart's desires. Instead I was imposing outside rules on my heart and life decisions and by doing so, I was constantly ending up in fucked-up, incredibly painful situations. I was "doing the right thing" or separating myself from people and following the external dogma when my heart truly wanted to go in the opposite direction.
I have experienced no greater sense of relief and peace than the peace that has come with understanding (1) that I was programmed; and (2) that the programming finally failed.
To quote Martin Luther King, and I know it's horribly out of context but the words move me so,
"Free at last, free at last. Thank God I'm free at last..."
Antigen:
--- Quote ---On 2006-01-01 13:14:00, Anonymous wrote:
I believe it's a state of mind, as to WHAT EACH person does with their experience. I could look back and complain about being "locked up" for a year or whatever, or I could choose to use some of the tools offered and get something out of it. I choose to use it to my benefit instaed of being a "victim".
Wish more people would. Life is better that way."
--- End quote ---
Yeah, I hear Prozac and benzos are real good for that. I choose to use any available means to help put an end to the catastrophically dangerous perception that the Program method is the safest, most effective and (more and more often) legally mandated form of treatment for everything from pot smoking to oppositional defiance disorder and draptomania.
Babylon in all its desolation is a sight not so awful as that of the human mind in ruins.
-- Scrope Davies: Letter to Thomas Raikes, May 25, 1835.
--- End quote ---
Antigen:
--- Quote ---On 2006-01-01 16:39:00, Anonymous wrote:
Curiosity piqued my desire to go looking for some grads. I expected to find people who were mildy successful and mostly happy with their life. Does this fit any of you?
Neil
--- End quote ---
Yeah, that's me. I didn't graduate the Seed, though. Most of my family did, then I went to Straight. What a long, strange trip it's been, too! But I have about everything I ever wanted now.
Religion is a byproduct of fear. For much of human history, it may have been a necessary evil, but why was it more evil than necessary? Isn't killing people in the name of God a pretty good definition of insanity?
--Arthur C. Clarke, author
--- End quote ---
Antigen:
--- Quote ---On 2006-01-01 19:51:00, Anonymous wrote:
Call me selfish, blind, irresponsible or whatever but researching the outcome of Seed Grads is not one of the pertinent issues in my life. It?s curiosity at best.
--- End quote ---
Uh, Neil, you were the one to [egheghm] suggest that we're all a bunch of angry fuckups and failures. Got studies to support that?
It only takes a little prescience to understand that we're all fair game for the deeds we condone.
--Antigen
--- End quote ---
Antigen:
--- Quote ---On 2006-01-01 21:15:00, Anonymous wrote:
Please don't accuse me of not caring or being uncompassionate.
--- End quote ---
But you are being uncompassionate. And really hostile, too. Do you talk to people in real life like this?
Think of it in just a slightly different context. What if you got a kidney transplant and all went incredibly well, beyond all expectations. You thank the doctors and the good mother earth and come to nearly worship the staff and think of them and other patient families as family away from home. All that's great till you find out that your new kidney came from a healthy young highschool kid. They just clubbed him over the head, took the damned thing w/o his consent, patched him up a bit then shoved him out the door to make way for the next one and the next.
Still think those mother fuckers are heros worthy of your adoration and defense?
Creationists make it sound like a 'theory' is something you dreamt up after being drunk all night.
--Isaac Asimov, Russian-born American author
--- End quote ---
_________________
Drug war POW
Straight, Sarasota
`80 - `82
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