Author Topic: My son at Aspen Ranch (Read 96173 times)

Anonymous · « **Reply #435 on:** November 07, 2009, 12:34:33 PM »

You have no right to make any decisions about your son's future at all, as you are clearly unfit to do so.

Get the fuck out of here.

Whooter · « **Reply #436 on:** November 07, 2009, 01:46:04 PM »

There is some irony and humor in all of this. If we flipped this over and this were a survivor telling their story of abuse and I came on here and said they were lying and to get the fuck off this forum people would be shocked and looking to have me banned.... Ha,Ha,Ha It is interesting looking at it from this perspective!
Unless I were here to point this out no one would be able to see this double standard. The unconscious ability to turn a blind eye to what is going on continues to amaze me.

Ursus · « **Reply #437 on:** November 07, 2009, 01:49:21 PM »

Quote from: "Nigel"

My wife had plenty of free time with my son and she gave him plenty of opportunity (by asking questions) to let her know how things are at the ranch. His main complaints are that it is too structured for him and that there is no time that he can be alone. He wants to be back in his room (and home) where he can make his own decisions and have some privacy.

Nigel, you and your wife may feel that your son had opportunity to really tell you what was going on, but that simply isn't the case. After you or your wife leaves Aspen Ranch and goes back home, your son still needs to survive, psychologically speaking, at the program. Do you think he is going to actually volunteer something that might, however seemingly benign the context, get back to his therapist as "evidence" of his not "working his program" appropriately? Believe me, what you might regard as raising a valid question, is not necessarily how Aspen Ranch might see it.

Moreover, the lack of unstructured alone-time should give anyone familiar with indoctrination and brainwashing methods ample cause for pause. Doesn't this raise any red flags for you?

NIGEL · « **Reply #438 on:** November 07, 2009, 02:42:38 PM »

My wife was off campus, "unstructured time," for a total of 4 hours. I know this doesn't sound like a lot of time, but I think it is probably enough time to get a good read on how he is doing. When I visit in 2 weeks, we will have the whole day. I want you all to know that I am glad I came to this forum as it has made me analyze everything. Part of me wants to bring my son home right now, but I have to be very careful in doing so.

Troll Control · « **Reply #439 on:** November 07, 2009, 02:51:37 PM »

Quote from: "Whooter"

There is some irony and humor in all of this. If we flipped this over and this were a survivor telling their story of abuse and I came on here and said they were lying and to get the fuck off this forum people would be shocked and looking to have me banned.... Ha,Ha,Ha It is interesting looking at it from this perspective!
Unless I were here to point this out no one would be able to see this double standard. The unconscious ability to turn a blind eye to what is going on continues to amaze me.

It amazes me, too. I don't understand how you're so easily able to overlook a child rape and Aspen's failure to report this child reape that happened at their facility because they have no safety systems in place. How you can miss this amazes me every time. So we agree on that!

And, someone correct me if I'm wrong, but Whooter has been calling survivors "liars" here for years and laughing at their horror stories of bindings, beatings, rapes and deprivation and nobody kicked him off the forum.

It's just funny to watch him wiggle, wiggle, squirm, squirm when he feels the sting!! sting!! of being exposed as a child abuse supoorting liar every time his precious (Aspen) gets knocked for abusing kids, or even killing them. He's like Golem roaming Middle Earth enslaved to his precious (Aspen) and forced to do their evil bidding (supporting the rape and killing of children in Aspen's programs). He's a very, very sick person.

Whooter · « **Reply #440 on:** November 07, 2009, 04:20:43 PM »

Quote from: "Ursus"

Quote from: "Nigel"
My wife had plenty of free time with my son and she gave him plenty of opportunity (by asking questions) to let her know how things are at the ranch. His main complaints are that it is too structured for him and that there is no time that he can be alone. He wants to be back in his room (and home) where he can make his own decisions and have some privacy.
Nigel, you and your wife may feel that your son had opportunity to really tell you what was going on, but that simply isn't the case. After you or your wife leaves Aspen Ranch and goes back home, your son still needs to survive, psychologically speaking, at the program. Do you think he is going to actually volunteer something that might, however seemingly benign the context, get back to his therapist as "evidence" of his not "working his program" appropriately? Believe me, what you might regard as raising a valid question, is not necessarily how Aspen Ranch might see it.

Moreover, the lack of unstructured alone-time should give anyone familiar with indoctrination and brainwashing methods ample cause for pause. Doesn't this raise any red flags for you?

Not sure if you have kids or not, Ursus, but a mother would know if there was something wrong with her son. 4 hours off campus "one on one" is plenty of time to unwind and talk. It sounds like Nigels son is benefitting from his stay so far.
Thanks for the updates Nigel.

Troll Control · « **Reply #441 on:** November 07, 2009, 05:15:31 PM »

Quote from: "Guest"

Quote from: "Whooter"
There is some irony and humor in all of this. If we flipped this over and this were a survivor telling their story of abuse and I came on here and said they were lying and to get the fuck off this forum people would be shocked and looking to have me banned.... Ha,Ha,Ha It is interesting looking at it from this perspective!
Unless I were here to point this out no one would be able to see this double standard. The unconscious ability to turn a blind eye to what is going on continues to amaze me.

It amazes me, too. I don't understand how you're so easily able to overlook a child rape and Aspen's failure to report this child reape that happened at their facility because they have no safety systems in place. How you can miss this amazes me every time. So we agree on that!

And, someone correct me if I'm wrong, but Whooter has been calling survivors "liars" here for years and laughing at their horror stories of bindings, beatings, rapes and deprivation and nobody kicked him off the forum.

It's just funny to watch him wiggle, wiggle, squirm, squirm when he feels the sting!! sting!! of being exposed as a child abuse supoorting liar every time his precious (Aspen) gets knocked for abusing kids, or even killing them. He's like Golem roaming Middle Earth enslaved to his precious (Aspen) and forced to do their evil bidding (supporting the rape and killing of children in Aspen's programs). He's a very, very sick person.

Oh I hear ya. And this stupid game with Whooter playing both himself and NIGEL is tedious. We all know already they're the same person, but still he keeps at it. I guess whatever keeps him busy is fine, but nobody here buys it at all so it's really just a waste of time. I'm sure he'd like to talk about anything other than the recently proven allegations of rape and abuse at Aspen.

Ursus · « **Reply #442 on:** November 07, 2009, 05:33:17 PM »

Quote from: "Guest"

Quote from: "Ursus"
Quote from: "Nigel"
My wife had plenty of free time with my son and she gave him plenty of opportunity (by asking questions) to let her know how things are at the ranch. His main complaints are that it is too structured for him and that there is no time that he can be alone. He wants to be back in his room (and home) where he can make his own decisions and have some privacy.
Nigel, you and your wife may feel that your son had opportunity to really tell you what was going on, but that simply isn't the case. After you or your wife leaves Aspen Ranch and goes back home, your son still needs to survive, psychologically speaking, at the program. Do you think he is going to actually volunteer something that might, however seemingly benign the context, get back to his therapist as "evidence" of his not "working his program" appropriately? Believe me, what you might regard as raising a valid question, is not necessarily how Aspen Ranch might see it.

Moreover, the lack of unstructured alone-time should give anyone familiar with indoctrination and brainwashing methods ample cause for pause. Doesn't this raise any red flags for you?
Not sure if you have kids or not, Ursus, but a mother would know if there was something wrong with her son. 4 hours off campus "one on one" is plenty of time to unwind and talk. It sounds like Nigels son is benefitting from his stay so far.
Thanks for the updates Nigel.

Mmmm... right. You tell that to Cathy Sutton, Whooter. I'm sure she'll feel real nice about her "mother's intuitions" having failed her ... given that her daughter Michelle is ... yes, quite dead, and there really is no way of now reversing that tragic event.

The fact is, often there is absolutely no way to prepare a parent for just how much obfuscation is layered over the information they receive. Lots of folk get schnookered in, especially the well-meaning, honest, hard-working types who treat everyone else according to the Golden Rule... There is simply nothing in their experience which would help them understand or believe the snake pit they've inadvertently wandered into... until it's too late.

Hopefully, it won't come to that.

Whooter · « **Reply #443 on:** November 07, 2009, 05:55:38 PM »

Quote from: "Ursus"

Mmmm... right. You tell that to Cathy Sutton, Whooter. I'm sure she'll feel real nice about her "mother's intuitions" having failed her ... given that her daughter Michelle is ... yes, quite dead, and there really is no way of now reversing that tragic event.

Ursus, The mother and Micelle never had the contact that Nigel son had with his mother. Nigels mother and her son had time off campus together and if her son were hurting then she would probably know it. I know that I would as a parent. Its a parent child connection that is hard to explain. If Nigels mother feels comfortable then her son is probably in good hands.

Troll Control · « **Reply #444 on:** November 07, 2009, 06:30:12 PM »

You would know? Wow, coming from a guy who either didn't know or approved of his daughter giving lapdances to staff members or simulationg felatio on them as part of her 'therapy,' this is pretty unbelievable. If you didn't know this, shame on you. If you did, shame on you.

Explain to the rest of us how a little being forced to simulate sucking her counselors cock is therapeutic. Just explain that and I'm sure people will relax on you a bit. Make us understand how this is helpful to a child.

Whooter · « **Reply #445 on:** November 08, 2009, 09:44:03 AM »

Quote from: "Guest"

Quote from: "Ursus"
Mmmm... right. You tell that to Cathy Sutton, Whooter. I'm sure she'll feel real nice about her "mother's intuitions" having failed her ... given that her daughter Michelle is ... yes, quite dead, and there really is no way of now reversing that tragic event.

Ursus, The mother and Micelle never had the contact that Nigel son had with his mother. Nigels mother and her son had time off campus together and if her son were hurting then she would probably know it. I know that I would as a parent. Its a parent child connection that is hard to explain. If Nigels mother feels comfortable then her son is probably in good hands.

A mother /son relationship is special. If there were a problem the mother would know.

Anonymous · « **Reply #446 on:** November 08, 2009, 12:51:34 PM »

Nigel

I was just wondering and would appreciate it if you would answer the following questions so that it is easier to understand your son's situation and what he is being treated for. Before you sent him away

1. Before you sent him away was he given a diagnosis found in the DSM for any condition he might have had? If he was what was the diagnosis and what was the treatment? What was the view of the professional who made the DSM diagnosis of your decision to send your son to Aspen? Did he put that view in writing?
2. Was he evaluated by a child study team at his school? What were their findings? How were their recommendations implemented?
3. How much do you pay at Aspen? What is the extent of your son's interaction with LICENSED professionals at Aspen?
4. Did a licensed professional at aspen come up with a diagnosis and treatment plan for your son? What is the diagnosis? Is it in writing? Did you sign a contract with aspen that specifically said that they were not providing treatment for the condition that was diagnosed?

I ask these questions because you raise important issues and it is much easier to understand and discuss the issue in the context of specifics rather then generalities.

.

NIGEL · « **Reply #447 on:** November 08, 2009, 04:44:51 PM »

Quote from: "just wondering"

Nigel

I was just wondering and would appreciate it if you would answer the following questions so that it is easier to understand your son's situation and what he is being treated for. Before you sent him away

1. Before you sent him away was he given a diagnosis found in the DSM for any condition he might have had? If he was what was the diagnosis and what was the treatment? What was the view of the professional who made the DSM diagnosis of your decision to send your son to Aspen? Did he put that view in writing?
2. Was he evaluated by a child study team at his school? What were their findings? How were their recommendations implemented?
3. How much do you pay at Aspen? What is the extent of your son's interaction with LICENSED professionals at Aspen?
4. Did a licensed professional at aspen come up with a diagnosis and treatment plan for your son? What is the diagnosis? Is it in writing? Did you sign a contract with aspen that specifically said that they were not providing treatment for the condition that was diagnosed?

I ask these questions because you raise important issues and it is much easier to understand and discuss the issue in the context of specifics rather then generalities.

.

I will answer some of your questions, but out of respect for my son, not all. When he was home, we had him seeing both a psychiatrist and psychologist. The psychiatrist diagnosed him (depression) and started him on meds. He went through two different types and they seemed to be making a difference. During the last 6 months at our house my son stopped taking his meds and proceeded to self medicate. When he arrived at The Aspen Ranch he was assigned a therapist and a psychiatrist (both are licensed). My son has been adament about not restarting meds and we are all OK with that. He mostly works with his therapist now and he does have things he works on with her. We are pretty happy about the help he has received, but we still have concerns about whether or not he needs to stay there (he doesn't like it and feels he is ready to come home). My wife just spent 4 days at The Ranch and she is leaning on the side of bringing him home pretty soon. We are currently talking about this and also asking for advice from his old psychologist (who my son respects). I do believe that my son has "seen the light" (his words), but whether or not he will slip back into his old ways when he does come home is our biggest concern. I will see him in two weeks and hopefully get a better feel for how he is doing.

Anonymous · « **Reply #448 on:** November 08, 2009, 07:54:02 PM »

sorry NIgel. It doesn't work that way. You can answer each of the questions I asked without disclosing anything about your son. You are anonymous and he is too. And based on your response I would add the following questions.
1.Does that mean he is being treated at aspen for depression?
2. Has the psychiatrist or psychologist endorsed a treatment plan for your son that does not include meds? Did they sign it/ 3. How often does your son see the licensed psychologist and psychiatrist for individual sessions? Have they conferred with the prior treaters?
Your response to me has all of the lingo that aspen loves to use and none of the specifics. Please answer my specific questions. Otherwise the only reasonable conclusion is that you are a shill for aspen and what you are doing here is dishonest.

NIGEL · « **Reply #449 on:** November 08, 2009, 08:57:55 PM »

Quote from: "just wondering"

sorry NIgel. It doesn't work that way. You can answer each of the questions I asked without disclosing anything about your son. You are anonymous and he is too. And based on your response I would add the following questions.
1.Does that mean he is being treated at aspen for depression?
2. Has the psychiatrist or psychologist endorsed a treatment plan for your son that does not include meds? Did they sign it/ 3. How often does your son see the licensed psychologist and psychiatrist for individual sessions? Have they conferred with the prior treaters?
Your response to me has all of the lingo that aspen loves to use and none of the specifics. Please answer my specific questions. Otherwise the only reasonable conclusion is that you are a shill for aspen and what you are doing here is dishonest.

Dear "Just Wondering",

Please don't take offense, but I could care less if you think I am a "shill for aspen." There are those on this forum that believe that I am "The Who" , or "The Who's" sockpupet. There are also those that know I am really just a parent that had to make the toughest decision of his life and am trying to now do my best to make sure that the next decision I make is the right one. I am here to get help in my decisions (present and future) concerning my son. That being said, yes they (and we) are working on his depression. Yes they have come up with a treatment plan that doesn't include meds. So far he has been handling things well and he seems to better understand how he re-acts to stress and how to better manage his emotions when he faces rough times. He meets with his therapist for two sessions (1 hour each) a week and his therapist leads group therapy 4 times a week. Is it ideal, no. Does he appear to be improving, yes. Both of my son's prior doctors have conferred with the therapists at The Aspen Ranch and I truly believe that his current therapists want the best for my son. Whether or not their methods are effective is open to debate (and yes, my wife and I are trying our hardest to stay on top of this). We love our son and want the best for him. You can question our decision to send him to the Aspen Ranch (and that is why I am on this website), but I am getting a little tired of trying to convince people that I actually did have my son escorted to The Aspen Ranch and am now living with this decision. I am hurting (my wife even more than me) and we are doing the best we can to stay focused and together as a family.

Fornits
Fornits Home for Wayward Web Fora
An open discussion about the troubled parent industry