I know you are not "the goof off", and I am glad but I can also love the goof off too especially if they came from where we come from b/c then i know why they are like they are and understand it b/c I have been there. Haven't we all "been there"?
To literally "wake up" from a brainwashing is like a true real live nightmare, actually. It was like literally waking up from a horrible bad dream or like waking up after being heavily medicated and knocked out b/c when I "woke up" everything felt weird, new, and very strange. It was like a big blur and void had taken place in my life. Realizing how much of a chunk of my life that "they had stolen from me", and used me to their advantage to further their negative causes and abusive ways sickened me to the point of complete panic.
The rest of the feelings are in the screenplay I am writing about this very subject.
Like I said I have not seen the video tape in such a long time but I know when I watch it again memories are bound to be flooding back, and I am sure it will sicken my stomach again.
Take care,
-DP
No citizen of a liberal and democratic nation profits from a victorious war.
--Ludwig von Mises