Fornits

Fornits Home for Wayward Web Fora
An open discussion about the troubled parent industry

This is maybe a very different perspective than most of the posts here - although I haven't come close to reading them all.

I to was at "The Farm" 72-73 ish; I was a "workers" kid. My dad had just died and mom packed us up and moved us to C.C., Tx.  I guess she was the equivalent of one of his lieutenants; I know she flew around with him alot and she also taught at the school -typing and accounting stuff - (everything but raising her own sons).

You know at the time I didn't know any better because my mom kept us so "sheltered" from the world and it was a place to be feared, the devil was under every rock, etc.....   Well let me tell you I am pissed about it - for alot of reasons (like alot of cool stuff that was going on in the world that I missed - yeah there was bad also, but that's life) mainly I'm pissed for the fear that was instilled into me as a small child that has remained till this day.

Anyway, I remember so much about that time - we lived in a trailer across the street from the Camerons, I played with Sabrina, Granny and Poppa Weatherfords (adopted I believe) daughter, Church and more church all the time, had puppy love for a few of you girls, the cows and goats milk, hearing talk about the "welfare" closing us down. I do hear from my mom occassionaly about the status of things and have seen "aunt nener" and Della a few times, but I have never really gotten a chance to speak to any of you "inmates" and commiserate.

As a interesting aside, my greatest fear was realized a couple of years after leaving the farm. I got sent to the Christian Corral Ranch for boys in '75 for 2 1/2 years. Gotta  love it.
 
I was always sympathetic towards the girls and thought that had to be the worst thing - to be cut off from your parents anf family.

I could go on and on here but it would read like War & Peace, so
if you feel like contacting me please feel free.
Robin Howell
http://www.rootsweb.com/~txnavarr/biogr ... er_leo.htm
a lot of survivors also find it hard to decipher the actual years there. its been a long time and its hard to always pinpoint the year correctly.

RobinHowell said:
You know at the time I didn't know any better because my mom kept us so "sheltered" from the world and it was a place to be feared,


From Gentlestormi:
i believe you, i know you are right about that. as kids we none of us, "knew any better" because kids are hardwired to trust in what their caregivers tell them. Sadly so many from the fundamentalists camps ever teach their kids to think critically and see things from other angles and perspectives. It sounds like though Robin, you have managed to find a way to think freely for yourself, i am glad you have.


RobinHowell Said:
As a interesting aside, my greatest fear was realized a couple of years after leaving the farm. I got sent to the Christian Corral Ranch for boys in '75 for 2 1/2 years. Gotta love it.


From Gentlestormi:
so, you had moved off from the Roloff Evangelistic Enterprises farm in Corpus Christi for two years, before being sent to Christian Corral Ranch for boys in 1975?
but you lived on the farm in 72-73"ish"? but then remember living across from the Camerons...are you talking about Wiley Cameron Senior or Wiley Cameron Junior? bit confusing, sorry. Were there other Camerons who lived on the Farm?


I have always understood that the Camerons came to Roloffs in 74 and moved into the dorms to be the dorm parents. That they were dorm parents in 74, also based on the stories of some who were there in the dorm in 74 .

was the Christian Corral Ranch for Boys a Roloff home or a Roloff type home? i do not think i have ever heard of it, if you can, can you share where it was and what it was about? was it like a roloff home?

 
thanks
Gentlestormi
Roloff Rebekah Survivor to Overcomer
77-78

http://blogs.usatoday.com/oped/2007/08/ ... s-wha.html[/url]

USA Today -- August 29, 2007
by Tom Krattenmaker

Commentary[/u] :
http://www.criticalthinking.org/resourc ... 8-News.cfm

Aristotle is alleged to have said, "The mark of an educated person is their ability to entertain positions other than their own." An open mind is essential to critical thinking. Yet, most religions and atheist positions are cut from the same cloth. Neither of these "metaphysical" positions is given to recognizing or admitting what can't yet be substantiated. No conclusive proof of the existence, or non existence, of our vaguely defined concepts of god currently exists. However, both religious and secular camps believe what they believe, and the fact that they believe one way or the other is, itself, held as "proof" of their truths' validity. When people already know the truth by equating their beliefs with fact, they aren't thinking critically. Their truths get in the way of their and others' journeys to discovery and learning. Belief systems — religious as well as secular faiths — are generally held together by external third-party "arguments by authority" such as gods, apostles, prophets, gurus, scriptures, literature, language, as well as by our social conditioning and other intellectual blind spots. And, it isn't always that we don't know what we know and don't know, but that we hold the truth in self-righteousness and want to impose our version of it on everyone else. We need to check our legacy beliefs and belief systems at the door and adopt a more agnostic, albeit tentative, working relationship with each other in the things we may believe but don't actually know. The difference between knowledge and belief is a fine one grounded in a non cynical yet skeptical process of objective reasoning. Critical thinking emphasizes the trancendence of egocentricities and sociocentricities with intellectual humility and rigorous independent exploration and examination of diverse points of view that are clear, accurate, precise, and relevant. A seminal pedagogical concept and cadre of best practices that accompany all forms of inquiry, discourse, and understanding in virtually every domain and discipline, it is the foundational competency behind all learning. It’s the key to learning how to learn and to taking ownership of knowledge and skills in all other domains and disciplines. Available to any and all who choose to understand and practice it, it's the purview of neither religious nor secular camps.


GentleStormi
Roloff Rebekah Survivor to Overcomer
77-78

SistersSurvivors
http://roloffsisterssurvivors.bravehost.com/index.html

Hello, My name is Ginger Hoover and I was in Rebekah from 1980 to 81.  I cant believe most of what I am reading.  Rebekah was a save haven! I think those that are writing terrible things about Rebekah are not Christan at all and couldnt stand discipline or correction.  They wanted to live their filthy lives, which consisted of drugs, sex, pregnancy and diseases.  Someone loved me enough to send me to Rebekah where i could be protected from the world.  I thank the Lord everyday for the year I spent in Rebekah.  Cult?  That is so laughable.   I never seen lockup.  I never seen any abuse while I was there.  I knew of one girl in a whole year that went to lockup.  If you are going to act crazy and disrupt a peaceful enviroment then you need some time out!  Good grief!!  I was fed very well! I had a clean soft bed, clean room with shag carpet.  Loving people all around!  A great education!  It so sad to read the horrible things that are being said about Rebekah.  To those of you who love the Lord I have a great website that you can go to and listen to some of the best online sermons ever heard.  My favorite preacher to listen to is Henry Mahan.  The spiritual growth  that you will recieve is such a great comfort !  
www.sovereign-grace.com/sermon.htm

May the Lord Bless those who are His,
Ginger Hoover

My life verse:  Psm 40:2  He brought me up also out of an HORRIBLE PIT, out of the Miry Clay and set my feet upon a rock and established my goings.  (That rock is Christ my Savior)

===============================



Ginger said:
"May the Lord Bless those who are His"


from Gentlestormi:
yes, he does bless those who are his, and he also blesses those who are supposedly "not" his, but all peoples bear his image on them.
Ever read where Jesus told you and i to bless and not to curse even our enemies? he says in Mattew 5 that he causes it to rain on the good and the bad, and he causes it to shine on the good and the bad.

http://www.iclnet.org/pub/resources/tex ... n-04b.html

see Luke 13:4,5

we do reap what is sown, we reap the things we spent time in sowing, that is for sure. Certainly Roloffs Juvenile lockdown facilities Workers are getting back what they have sown, and are filled with the reapings of their sowings, and truly Christ is correct when he said "Wisdom is proven of its children"

But there are also things that happen because of other persons failures and negligence, take the bridge that recently collapsed in Minnesota. WHY did it collaspe?
does it mean anything other than that the bridge was old and worn out and needed attention to it? some would say "God killed those persons" they speak from an heart that is incapable of compassion and mercy, but some would say "It was the devil that did that" they dont want to hold the bridge builders and the City of Minneapolis accountable for the crash and deaths of so many victims, and  they grandiosly seek to gloss over human failure and human negligence and blame it either on God or the devil, or even the victims of trauma and misfortune.

we can bless those we love and we can curse those we dont regard as fully human,  please see the book wrtten by James the brother of Jesus. he talked about this prejudice of mind, this warped ability in our beings to be able to bless God and then turn around and curse those made in the Image of God.


Ginger said:
Someone loved me enough to send me to Rebekah where i could be protected from the world.


From Gentlestormi:

You feel that you were cared for, loved ,cherished and sheltered from having to deal with the broken world out there. i would also tend towards thinking too that you may have been so separate from the rest of humanity that you might just be missing the mark in being able to relate to them?

take another look, when did Christ separate himself from the rest of the world?  please find some verses for me to see that he did that?

Christ never separated himself from the sinners, he sat down and ate and drank with them, and was accused of being a "winebibber and drunken and glutton" a lazy no do gooder. why? because he sat down to get to know the persons that religious institutions would not dare to be seen around. people who in their brokenenss could not know how to fix their self.  People who were just eeking it out from pay day to pay day.

to my way of seeing it and my experience, going knocking on doors to "witness" was not connecting to people in the world. it was a smug attempt to bring them into a mindset that did not allow for any room for open discussion or talking through any issues one had.
in my opinion, reading someone the "Roman Road to Salvation" is pointless if one has no capacity to get to know the person first.




GentleStormi
SistersSurvivors
77-78
Rebekah Survivor to Overcomer
http://roloffsisterssurvivors.bravehost.com/index.html

May God forgive you all for the hateful, selfish, and hurtful things you say about the homes and people who loved God. I never saw anything of this sort happen to anyone. I only have good memories and instilled in my heart many character traits that sadly to say many of you who lacked such things went to the homes in the first place. Many of you were sent there against your will filled with bitter hatred, deeply wounded, lonely, sad, pathetic wicked people who interpreted "discipline" as being beaten and terribly mistreated -- oh poor you so spoiled rotten that you couldn't take any type of reprimand and no it wasn't abuse at all. And it only shows how you all are still in the same place in life today as you were the day you walked through the gate at the farm and this is so sad to hear. I for one have no regrets and would do it all over again if need be. Not everyone is able to be strong enough to love and take in such stubborn, strong-willed, rude, law-breaking, society rejects and not fold. Most of you should have just been sent straight to juve/prison --maybe you would have been treated like royalty -- you need to earn respect -- you give it and you receive it. But, you are still going to feel the way you do and I'm glad I didn't allow the devil to win this battle -- this is one I won by God's wonderful grace and mercy and today lead a fulfilling, happy, and wonderful life and don't allow such petty things to be strongholds in my life as you do. Get over it--life's to short and oh so precious if you treat it right.

Jesus came to take away the sins of the whole world. every sin ever committed and every sin that still will be commmitted has been paid for, there only needs remain the persons ability to lean onto the Lord for trusting in that what Christ did on calvarly,
i can see why your approach here may not be working and coming across in a way that is helpful, apparently  there is no offer of love, or compassion from you.
It says that Christ did not come into the world to judge it, but to save it.
yet here you audaciously stand here and tout that you are his, and yet show no mercy , no love and no open door to the ones who need love, compassoin and mercy.
the bible says to those who show no mercy, no mercy shall be given to them.


Faceless nameless said:
Many of you were sent there against your will filled with bitter hatred, deeply wounded, lonely, sad, pathetic wicked people who interpreted "discipline" as being beaten and terribly mistreated --

Gentlestormi says:
you sure know all the facts on all the thousands who walked through the homes, dont you? were you given access to all of everyones files? read all their personal history (if there were any)? you seem to be filled with utmost knowlege about each and every single individual that went through the homes, or are you basing such horrid judgements from your judges podium upon what Roloff had to say about us as a whole?
Roloff did not see individuals,
Roloff saw a lump of ugliness that was a obviously was a projection of his own issues, he was a sexist for he exhibited in word and in action his belief in the inferiority of women and he exhibited in word and action an abusive way of treating them. He did not see us as girls with minds and individual ilves, he saw us as he projected his own warped issues onto us females, "whores , witches, prostitutes" his harsh stance was rooted more than likely in how he grew up. he was extremely sexist to my opinion because of this denigration to females on his compound and who were in his homes.

for your information, namless faceless poster, i actually agreed to go to see Roloff, i actually hoped it was a safe place for me, i wanted to be in a safe place, i needed to get away from abusive people in my family of origins, who were not caring for me but were using me and abusing, me,

i remember sitting across from Lester in his office at the People's Church, i remember the "interview" i recall how badly i wanted to escape my hellish home life, and hoped he would let me stay,

it turned out nameless faceless person, that my trust was shattered, the place was no haven of rest, it was a pit from the dungeons of hell, my own Dad years later has said that to me, he now realizes how wrong they were to trust in Camerons, and he said that Rebekah Home was a "Dungeon from the pits of hell" and he is right, this was something coming from my own dad who actually was a roloff supporter for years, and also an extremisits and fundamentalists in that mindset for years.

at least nameless faceless has amitted to us being deeply wounded. but i wonder why nameless faceless is not showing compassion and help to those who were wounded?

namelessfaceless said:
oh poor you so spoiled rotten that you couldn't take any type of reprimand and no it wasn't abuse at all.


from Gentlestormi:
so spoiled rotten? yes, i remember how spoiled i was for hurting, i lay in a hospital bed with stiches in my arm because of my deep depression at age 14, from all the abuses from sexual perverts and controllers, i was accused then of being selfish and uncaring. oddly i was not given any rights to scream or even cry when i was being hurt. i was totally told i had to be non human, and this is dehumanizing of others created in Gods Own image and who are all based on that,worthy.

in my way of hearing you and experiencing your post, your attitude smells badly and i would think it stinks to Gods throne room and you bring upon the name of Christ a blasphemous stench. unless of course you can pull out the word of God and stand on it, use the verses that justify this attitude?

where is the love? or did you forget that love endures, that love is kind, that love is something that is thoughtful of others, that love waits patiently? did you forget that love never gives up? that love never throws in the towels on that which it loves? that love is always there, and never dies out? obviously you have no show of love for those who need wound care. if i were the doctor i would not let you into the room with those who needed care, you would obviously be abusive and sneering to these wounded, you would not be allowed in the room with them, for your apparent spirit of hatred to them is so high it is grossly negligent of what God tells you to do:
help them , reach them
yet, you are preaching as if the purpose of preaching were to nail them and judge them and tell them what horrid beings you think of them. you do not know the God of love and compassion, i dont know what god you do know, whatever you seem to know its apparently dead and inactive and not working in your post above.

nameless facelesssaid:
 Not everyone is able to be strong enough to love and take in such stubborn, strong-willed, rude, law-breaking, society rejects and not fold.


Gentlestormi replies:
Love is enough, God is love, love NEVER fails, but since you are failing you have no real love. your type of  "love" is a cloak to hide over your spirit of maliciousness and hate, (sounds a lot like a roloff voice in your post, a voice of the abuser and tyrant) (a wolf hiding in a sheeps covering?)

why do you have a need to stomp on the hearts of broken people?
you apparently are among the pharisees who also wanted  to be in high places but who would not help anyone "below them". you are among those who throw stones on sinners and Christ says, "you who are without sin and wrong, you throw the first stones"
and "those who live by the sword will die by the sword" i.e. what goes around comes back around.  

Thank God , that his love to Hagar was good. that God cared about Hagar and though God gives people free will to do waht they want, he did not stop Sarah from abusing this girl,
 even so, ....God is there in our deserts, when we feel outcast and alone and rejected by some society, God is there in our vast loneliness and deserts when we find no resting place nor water to drink, God will meet us there, and come to us and help us and his word to us will help us and defend us

nameless faceless said:
Most of you should have just been sent straight to juve/prison


From Gentlestormi:
we were, it failed, again, Christ said, "Wisdom is proven by its children" look around, did it work? to send us to juvenile prison aka roloffs lockdown juvenile facilities?


nameless faceless said:
 And it only shows how you all are still in the same place in life today as you were the day you walked through the gate at the farm and this is so sad to hear.

From Gentlestormi:
we face our futures from the pasts that shaped us, to come out of the past means to change ones patterns of relating,

we learned those patterns from abusive others, we are like garden plants that grew up in soil that was tainted with toxins, buried there and we were  told it was godly to bury the poisons into the soil of our hearts, and thought it would not affect our lives,

when in fact we realize now that those buried poisons of feelings and memories are what causes us to hurt so badly after this many years of hiding those pains and are the root to our dysfunctional lives.

those who are working on thier issues are those who seek to dig out the poisons and toxins and clean their soil and make it fit for healthy growth. those who keep on burying their hurting feelings and pain, are loaded with toxic wastes in their minds and actions.

your past is what shaped you, your past is the root to your plant, the soil that fed your plant, to know your past, is to know who you are, a person with no past is a non person. a vegetable taking up space without any meaning.

nameless faceless said:
you need to earn respect -- you give it and you receive it.


From Gentlestormi:
""ditto""[/color]
....it is my opinion here that you have seriously failed earning any respect here from your posting.
you dont give any respect to any human being on this forum in your post here, you do not honor them as God created them to be honored.
in fact you chop them and dice them and tear them to shreds all in the name of Christ, you bring blasphemy onto his name. Because of the fact that Christ is not that. and you should know he is not. He does not do that to the hurting and bruised.
i am still astounded you dare to show an attitude of disdain and call that giving us respect? you will never earn it here nameless and faceless, not with me.

nameless faceless said:
But, you are still going to feel the way you do and I'm glad I didn't allow the devil to win this battle -- this is one I won by God's wonderful grace and mercy and today lead a fulfilling, happy, and wonderful life and don't allow such petty things to be strongholds in my life as you do. Get over it--life's to short and oh so precious if you treat it right.[/quote]



Gentlestormi replies:
wow, are you not something we all want to emulate?!
amazing paragon of Grace you are?
you did not allow satan to win this one huh? even though your words fly into the face and heart of Jesus with a large slap, ..amazing you that you can to stand before the God of heaven and so pat yourself on your back as a paragon of goodness and rightness and not so wierd as everyone else.

it reminds me of the story Jesus told of the two men who went up to pray at the temple, the one was self righteous and his prayer (talking to God) was "I thank you God that i am not like the others, I thank you God that i am better and I do this good deed here and I pay my tithes and live right and correct" and the other guy goes up to pray and wont even go close to the altar and pray ,but stands off from the church prayer place and beats his chest in pain, and says, "Oh God have mercy on me a sinner"

Christ said, that the one who did not feel ok with entering into the "holy place" and who beat his chest in painful reality, and prayed for mercy went away from prayer time more justified than the guy who thought by his good deeds he had some space he had earned before God Almighty.

notice how you tout that "you" won this, ? by Gods grace?
the meaning of Grace is Divine favor and help that one did not earn. i.e. Grace is meant to be shared with those who do not deserve it.

so if you earned it, its not been Grace at all but merely self efforts.

you really come across as sanctimonious self righteous. i would not ever be able to call you a sister to me. not unless you could realize what damage you do to the victims and survivors and the heart of God in Christ

you say to people in pain "get over it"
this is a mere cliche' used by those who cant handle others being honest.

its a cliche and has no meaning upon the lives of each single individual life you have scorned and disdained here.


but since you did fall prey to using mere cliches that have no real meaning to each person, would you please state how one gets over it? what do you do to get over it? i would like you to justify/explain this cliche you have slandered upon people who have pain.

Gentlestormi
Roloff Rebekah Survivor to Overcomer
77-78

SistersSurvivors
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/roloff-si ... -bethesda/

http://roloffsisterssurvivors.bravehost.com/index.html

oh i have better things to do with my time than sit here and type back and forth wallowing in self pity and shame dwelling on past things that are all in your heads, I just wanted to check back to see your replies and how defensive some of you get -- it's kinda sad, but at the same time kinda funny. I really don't mean to be ugly --uh troll oh come on - I'm just entitled to my opinion just as you all are and every once in awhile like to drop in to read up on these silly yet quite entertaining stories of yours sans of course  the "really bad" things that happened to you. Oh well, continue on and may God bless you all because his love is everlasting -- this is nothing new to Him -- just this sinful world doing what it does best...taking the glory away from God and may I add that you too "friend" have your place in the judgment line and may God have mercy on your soul -- for I look forward to that day because I have nothing to fear and am at peace within. So, go ahead and post up your once again negative reply for I will not allow you the privilege of response because I don't need to keep reading your pathetic sad stories over and over again. Please try dedicating as much energy and time as some of you do on these blogs and "research" and turn it to God, your children and families and who knows you may find true peace, joy, and happiness within yourselves. Just give it a try

Hi,

i have not been to Fornits in quite some time, just dropped in this morning, and have to apolgize here, but can you give me some bible verses that support your display of scorn and disdain for the broken and wounded? Can you please post some verses that support your theories of Christs condemnation to those whom he came to sit and eat dinner with? can you put some verses up here to actually support your sneering views of being holier than thou?

If you would do that then i think i could might actually engage you into a discussion as if we both were sane sensible thinkers who would go to the word of God to find out what it actually does have to say about the broken and bruised, what it does actually say about being compassionate to those who are hurt, instead of sneering down on them like you were some high and mighty monarch who had some standing of rightness in Gods prescence based solely on your own sense of being better than the rest of them

what does the bible say? be angry, but in your anger do not do evil. if you are a christian, why do you not show tears and compassion to those who were wounded by those who called themself Gods people? i wrote recently on my blog about Hagar, she was an outcast, and how did God treat Hagar?
Sarah and Abraham used this poor slave girl, used her and raised up her hopes of being among the elite with them then without thought to her personhoood cast them down, Sarah in her failure to trust in God, (a sin, yah, amazing to find that high people of Gods are sinners too, huh?)  she sold her slave girl out to get pregnant by Abraham, Abraham was a man, not a god. Roloff was also a man, not a god.Just sinners themselves. called by Gods name.

Sarah,  in her failure to trust and obey God ,wanted to "fix" this messy problem and so began to abuse Hagar, and this was not Gods doing, it was not of God to do that to Hagar, it was Sarah who did that, not God, Sarah beat the child, Sarah used her and disregarded her personhood. why? Because of failing faith in what God said he was going to do.

People in Gods name do terrible wrongs to others, they can be found to use them as if they were expendable. They then after using them, can be found to have toss them out ,

But God had a plan for Hagar, and what a wonderful thing that Hagar was honored to be the first woman God made direct communication to in the history of Genesis, an "outcast", the social reject, the used one, a woman that had been physically, emotionally and sexually abused and used, all by Gods "people".

does this mean God would then renig on his promises to Sarah and Abraham? no...because Gods faithfulness is not mans way of dealings, when God promises something he comes through with it. no matter how many "people of God" screw it up and hurt others in their falthLESSness.
people, all persons are broken and sin, abraham and sarah were no exception to that fact. God works with sinners, not those who are not in need of him. Christ said that in his phrase: "I did not come to call the righteous to returning back, but sinners" and "It is not the whole people who need a doctor, but it is the hurting and wounded ones who are in need of fixing and attention by a doctor"
(paraphrase)

Remember Hagar, ...the outcast and Gods compassion to her to meet her in her outcast place. there she was sobbing, weeping wailing and crying her heart and soul out, and God came down to meet with her, in her wilderness experience without family without roots, with out acceptance and in her desert of rejection, he met her there and honored her in a very specific manner to promise to her also his promises. God cared for her

the bible tells us of a God of compassion, one who sits and visits with us, one who seeks to mend the hearts that were broken by those who were "people of God", God promises not to snuff out the flickering candle, God promises to not break the bruised and bent over reed, even when humans in their sinning will think to break down and think its even God sevice to do that,

but God wants to set people free from all the hurt and brokenness and sadly, here you come in your own self sense of being "right and correct and pure before God" (sounds satanic to me, for there is NO ONE who can stand before God and say "Look at Me God, i am better because i dont hurt, i am better because i dont harp on the past" sounds a lot like pride satan exhibited)
but yet you breeze in here assuming that you have some better standing with God than the rest of broken humanity who is being honest, they are honest and God seeks honest people, not dishonest who pretend they are better, God can work more with those who are at least honest about their feelings, than he ever could with someone who wanted to gloss over the pain inside, who assumes they are superior because they dont "talk" about what hurts them,

please remember to post some verses to stand on where you feel you are justified in going around to condemn everyone here, just because they are real and honest persons. they speak about the truth of what happened to them, they allow their pain to be expressed about what is in them, and do not hide it, this is real and honest and those who condemn such honesty are not working with God but against him, for he hates falsehood.

go ahead post those verses that make you out to be someone who has earned some right to sit in a judges podium and stake out the laws and condemnation. please i want to see these verses .....

i dont know what scriptural gounds you are standing on?

in the bible i have not found your attitude to be in Christ at all,  maybe your attitude is more seeable in the religious Pharisees?whom Christ eventually said that they were like "whitewashed tombs filled with dead mens bones" , and he tagged the Pharisees attitudes in their "religiousity" as the vipers, not the regular people who needed hellp.

GentleStormi
SistersSurvivors
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/roloff-si ... -bethesda/

http://roloffsisterssurvivors.bravehost.com/index.html

so from what someone is explaing to me, your confusion is about the ip numbers? Blue, i do not comprehend what you are so upset about.

i have given you my honest answer. i learned from the man who owns the webforums where i ran the survivor forum that like if someone lives near to another the ip numbers can be very close or they might show up as an alias.

or if someone is an AOL user then the AOL has some differneces with thier numbers that causes others to appear the same.

two of the girls on the forum (the forum i ran) one lived way up north adn the other lived way down midsouth. they were both AOL users, well, on the forum they kept being in the same name category. I thot maybe they were out decieving me or that they were the same person. When i asked matt, the man who runs the stuff and knows all these answsers, he explained about AOL and how AOL does thier stuff differntly.

i wonder if this helps some to help you know that i did not ever cause you a problem but that the problem is a misunderstanding of things, and i am sorry, it sseems to me that if someone used my username of gentlestormi to invite you to a chat room, then they would also be likely to use my name for other purposes, i am not guilty of it.

i am sorry you cannot hear me, have i ever done anything to be an unkind or uncaring person to you?

no, i have not, i have always been on your side, and still will be , but i do get tired of being bitten, and attacked for things i am not guilty of.

have a good day ...
((((Bluemoon)))))

luv

GentleStormi

i am so deeply utterly sorry for all this massive misunderstandings...

i ran a forum for rebekah survivors who were interested in what i had to offer, in that forum i had all along a private chat room just for the members of that forum.

i set out a few weeks back to open up a chat room for the public.

i thought it would be a good way to meet new survivors and help others connect.

it did some good, and it also drained my energy reserves. I do not have the time to be in the chat all day and even my assistant was not able to be there all the time. i trust her and know she would use wisdom in clearing the chat room of information that would expose anyone to public shame or ridicule.

the other day when the huge misunderstanding began between you and i.... it started out that i thought to find a way to ensure who was who in the chat room and came up with using a secret question that only those of us who knew each other well would be able to know the answer to. noone had any issue with it, you emailed me thinking i was going to be changing the password daily. you misunderstood and i felt i could not get through to you what i had meant so i felt so worn out with the entire chat room,  that i decided to close it as i was worn out and didnt want to cause any offense.

you have read me wrong ..sweetie...i am on your side...

if you wanted to join the forum i had been offering, you had been invited to join ...when you requested to join it, i sent you the guidelines and understandings of the limitations of the forum that i run, and you decided not to join and be a participant..that is perfectly fine sweetie....i do not have any hurt ...k?....i dont try to coerce and or manipulate anyone to do anything they do not feel comfortable with...k?...((gentle smiles...)

but the chat room for the forum members was just that honey...for those who were members of the forum..its a personal decision and not one i force on anyone, its just my own personal limitations of what i know i can offer to others...i am who i am and i cannot be all things to everyone..i learn and find and try to stick to what i am capable of doing and try not to be or do something i cannot truly take good care of...when i do try something and see that it goes beyond my capacities i do stop it and change directions....for i am limited and cannot do every idea i come up with...k?...(gentle smiles.....)

i now see that the public chat has been not a fullproved wise decision in some ways and in other ways it was very helpful for some...

oh sweetie,..... i am on your side, i am so deeply deeply hurting to know you are hurt and upset and confused....i aplogize to you and am sorry you felt you could not private email with me to help us iron out the misunderstandings...friend...i am here, and i care ...k?....((((gentle friend huggles to you my friend)))....

so sorry blue...so so sorry....

am here and listening to you sweetie....and am so deeply sorry that the misunderstandings are hurting ....

love you and care truly in how you are viewing and seeing this...

take gentle care my friend
i wrap you in my friends arms...safe and optional friend hugs to you...(((((Bluemoon))))))

you are my friend
and i am yours

as much as you let it be that way...k?....

gentle huggles to you
love
your rebekah sister

GentleStormi

(((((((((((Bluemoon))))))))))))safe and totally optional huggles to  my special friend
 ::heart:: [ This Message was edited by: ? on 2005-06-15 00:31 ]

[ This Message was edited by: ? on 2005-06-15 00:55 ]