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Messages - kel78

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1
Straight, Inc. and Derivatives / Weather
« on: June 17, 2003, 08:13:00 PM »
Just thought I'd put in my two cents, seeing as how I'm spending the rest of my (hehe) liquid assets on an ark here in Alabama.  To the fella living in Utah now, smart move... I've never in my life seen this much rain this time of year.  I think it's El Nino or something like that.

And, I just had to say that Ginger rocks ALL for what she said about the table turning over episode, and how Jesus pretty much was a thorn in the side of the "experts" and "scholars".  

And, as Mark Lowry says, you have to love a guy whose first miracle was keeping a party going...

2
The Troubled Teen Industry / Provo Canyon Residential Treatment Center
« on: June 05, 2003, 02:53:00 PM »
Just because someone did have success or think that they have success in a program does not necessarily mean they're a "plant" or a "fake".  It's all about how you perceive things.  I'm not by any means condoning the abuses that take place, nor am I endorsing Provo.  But Lacey might really feel like it helped her, and that's good for her.  That's certainly not true for everyone who's been there, or possibly even for the majority.  She might even feel differently in a year or two.

Sorry to stick in here, I understand feeling maybe a little paranoid about people with positive things to say, but the best way to get through to someone at times is to be compassionate and patient.  Show your opinions, your facts and let them speak for themselves.  Most of the time, the facts get through to people, and unfortunately we can't always get through to every individual.

3
New Info / Thoughts
« on: June 04, 2003, 08:38:00 PM »
Life in the programs does make more sense.  It's structured, it's "safe", at least you feel safe when you can set your watch by different things, you grow accustomed to it, it does become your life, for better or for worse.  Sometimes it feels weird now, to say something or do something and have that little thing in the back of your mind go off with something you had branded on your brain as right or wrong or weird or whatever.

Anyway, understands what you mean... sometimes I miss the hermit-y feelings and the monotany myself.  It just goes with the territory.  Far as forgiving and forgetting, I remember being told once, in "Old Testament Law" (and they wondered why we hated some classes.. sheesh) that wrongs are remembered long.  

Good luck...

4
The Troubled Teen Industry / British coverage from the Daily Telegraph...
« on: June 04, 2003, 08:30:00 PM »
I don't think it's plagarism, quite honestly.  A lot of times the newspapers carry stories from the AP or Reuters wires and they're directly quoted.  Has something to do basically with covering the most stories from the widest range of sources.

(Just an aside from a former journalism student.. who'd have thought I'd ever use that? lol)

5
Straight, Inc. and Derivatives / revolt in south america
« on: May 29, 2003, 03:54:00 PM »
Guess what has always blown my mind is why on earth do you think that shipping your kid off to get the "tough love" treatment will work better than just talking and trying to get through it as a family?  And how these places determine that a kid has a problem.  Half the time it's just being a teenager, or something else that's perfectly 'normal' that gets blown out of proportion.  

Just makes ya wonder where common sense goes sometimes...

6
The Troubled Teen Industry / Last Dundee Teens Head Home
« on: May 29, 2003, 03:38:00 PM »
The sad part is, he would not be the first or probably not even the last kid to be just kind of stuck after something like this.  Sometimes I think parents get more brainwashed than the kids, or else they don't understand fully the depth of the problem.  If you believe in it, the power of prayer would help this kid more than anything right now, even when it seems like hands are tied.

7
The Troubled Teen Industry / Official WWASP Press Release
« on: May 29, 2003, 03:35:00 PM »
Just a quick question.  Where did the 'press release' come from?  A link to more information would be helpful.  

Just as an aside, 75% of all statistics are made up on the spot, and 100% can be adjusted to say pretty much whatever you want.  Learned that in a marketing class in college.

8
The Troubled Teen Industry / Lon of Strugglingteens.com is in it for the money
« on: May 23, 2003, 09:20:00 PM »
Please excuse me while I take just a moment to toss in a "YAY JANET!" and a "Thank you!" to her for her earlier post.  Granted, there are teenagers out there with serious problems, there are real, deep cases of depression and addiction (just like in adults, but no one seems to notice that either).  Sending a child away from family and friends, cutting them off from whatever social network they have, and forcing them into homes and facilities hundreds or thousands of miles from home does not, at least to this halfway sane mind, seem right on any level.  

I know there are people, like Lee Ann, who say and may truly believe that they're doing the right thing, that what they do is helping.  But, I was always told that the road to hell is paved with good intentions.  A real service would be helping those parents who don't have the financial means to cut back and work part time to spend more time getting to know their child.  Real service to help would help parents and families work through the process of adolescence, instead of simply sending the problem away.  A good public service would involve maybe even someone to listen, to offer a neutral, getting nothing financially out of dragging it out forever opinion.  Someone who didn't have an interest in exploiting a kid, but in helping a kid deal with the shit that gets dealt to teenagers and young adults these days.  

It's really easy to get so involved in something that you don't see ulterior motives.  Believe me, I've been there done that and all I got was this lousy t-shirt and matched baggage.  You get so caught up in "maybe this is what it takes to get me or help me (or my kid)" and you don't take the time to really even get to the root of "is this even an issue?"  It's sad but true, and happens so many times.  It happened to me, and to probably a lot of people who read these and other boards.  Point is, once you realize something's not right, it has to be acted  on.  A parent has to trust their kid enough to know the difference between NORMAL teen angst and depression and that kind of thing, and something more.  When I finally broke down and told my parents, look this is messing with me worse than what you sent me here to get over, they listened.  I'm fortunate in that.

I guess my point is, if someone really wants to help, help the family get itself back together.  Do what you can to help a single mom working a couple of jobs have a break or two to sit down and if nothing else, just eat a decent meal with her kid.  Or, help parents find things for their kids to get involved in, band or sports or anything that lets them have a positive outlet for things they might be holding inside.  Support the local after school programs in your area, if you want to help.  Think about how many kids $800 bucks would pay for band uniforms for, or how many kids that would feed supper to, so that parents could be home to deal with things.  Sorry to ramble on so... thanks for reading.

9
The Troubled Teen Industry / Death of Teenager in Mexico
« on: May 22, 2003, 04:43:00 PM »
Thanks so much for fixing that link, I apologize, I was copying and pasting from an offline in Yahoo to the message board.  Next time I'll open both my eyes and double check.

 :roll:

10
The Troubled Teen Industry / Death of Teenager in Mexico
« on: May 21, 2003, 05:30:00 PM »
I read an article about this just yesterday actually in an article posted in the Sun-Sentinel (www.sun-sentinel.com) however I can't seem to find it right now.  I'm trying to get in contact with the One that posted that to me, so that I can give you the entire link, I'll edit this post when I find it.  Apparently the boy was either 17 or 18 and from Sacramento, CA.  Casa by the Sea is in Mexico, and the death occurred there.  I wish I could remember the exact details, but anyway, I'll post the corrected link when I find it.  I've done a search on the Sun-Sentinel website, but the story I'm looking for doesn't come back.  

*UPDATED* This is the link to the Sun-Sentinel article about this situation.  http://www.sun-sentinel.com/news/local/ ... -caribbean  Thanks for giving a little time to find this out.

[ This Message was edited by: kel78 on 2003-05-22 06:12 ]

11
The Troubled Teen Industry / My Experience of PURE, Inc. and Sue Scheff
« on: May 21, 2003, 05:20:00 PM »
Just wanted to say thank you to the anonymous parent that visited schools when trying to decide how best to help a child.  It's good to have places like this, where voices can be heard, but it's equally important for parents to be just as aware of the places they send even "troubled" children.  I understand that in some cases, that's not financially possible, or it may be discouraged.  I just know that one day I'll be a mother, and there is no way in Murgatroid that I'm sending my child off to some place that I've never visited.  

Sue may be honestly trying to help place kids in schools where they can be helped to get past serious addictions, or real problems that can't be dealt with while a child lives at home.  But "corrective" schools and shipping off kids ought to be a last resort, and a well researched one.  You can only trust another person so much, not to sound too jaded, but you really can't be too careful.  There are a lot of walking reminders of that among the posters here.  

And for Carey's being banned from a board, the reasons that were given sound hauntingly familiar to me personally, and probably to a great number of readers.  The louder you protest, the harder they bite back.  Congrats for not letting them continue to censor and squelch.  I'm looking for 'demerits' these days, lol!  But seriously, thanks for standing up for all of us that are just learning we really have a choice and a voice.

12
New Info / WWASP - Testimony on Tranquility Bay
« on: May 21, 2003, 04:55:00 PM »
Ohh.. I like that idea!  For some of us, that's better than college was!  Just had to insert, and put my name first on the list for admission, think I need some weed, I mean, help. LOL!
 :nworthy:

13
New Info / Thoughts
« on: May 21, 2003, 04:47:00 PM »
You're in lots of prayers.  Maybe the places that we were didn't get the publicity, maybe we don't have a lot of people to communicate with and a lot of "cohorts" to share with.  Thinking a lot of the places may be like where I was.. a "Christian" place that seems to have fallen flat off the face of the earth.  Its hard to reconcile that religion and God aren't hand in hand with what was there.

I relate, totally, to your comparisons, the wanting to be like the martyrs, the desire to give life and heart and whole self over to something better and larger than the individual. That's why I was only in the place I was a short time, I toed every line, I followed every rule, I really believed the things they told me, I remember going to another girl's home and raving on about how much I loved it there, and I did at the time.  It felt like, if I could just convince her to go there, if I could just help her get away from her demons, that she could survive and make it, like the rest of us were doing.  Sometimes I see her face when I close my eyes, and I wonder where she is now, and did she make it, or did they pack those kids up and send them somewhere else, like the people that were there longer than me told stories about.

Anyway.  Sorry to ramble a bit, but you're in prayers, mine at least.  Hope there is a bit of consolation in knowing that you're not the only one who went through that kind of thing.  And thank you, for being brave and courageous enough to stand up and cast light on something that some of us have a hard time reconciling even existed.  You ARE a hero now.  And for the one who felt like a coward... you're not... just reading the posts and having the guts to post back is a step.  A really big one for some of us.

[ This Message was edited by: kel78 on 2003-05-21 13:50 ]

14
New Info / Pure aka http://www.helpyourteens.com? Good idea or bad idea
« on: May 21, 2003, 04:33:00 PM »
Has to agree with Khan on that one.  I could go through and even though I'm not a teenager anymore, I recognized lots of those things in me.  It's kind of frustrating that kids can't just be, that everything has to be a problem that needs fixed.  Sometimes, it just seems like another excuse to try and make a profit off someone else's problems.  

My first post... has been just reading for a while... this just struck me as sort of how I got in my situation, and so many others that I know and have spoken to

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