Let me start off with saying, I am not a bitch. I thought about what I was going to do all day today while at work, and I've come to a conclusion. I am going to put my faith and trust in another human being to do the right thing in this case. That means I am going to continue to take advantage of my free speech rights and this forum that invites all opinions for a free for all discussion, and live with the consequences whatever they may be. At this point I have no control over whether my information is going to be released. It's clear that many people want access to this information for their own purposes. I believe it's only a matter of time until, as a favor, it is sent around to others than the person who has this info right now. I really need my job and the money I make, without it I will probably end up homeless. If somebody can look themselves in the face every morning after having ruined someone's life just for the opinions they hold, then there is something wrong with that person and they should wonder what will their excuse be waiting at the gates of Heaven, being judged by God? This situation has gotten out of hand, and it is out of my control. I can only hope that people can act like adults and accept another opinion rather than destroy a life in order to shut them up.
You've had you're fun. I said what you wanted me to say. But from this point on I will follow nobody else's rules, but my own. I will no longer be threatened into silence, all because some person found a link to my face book account. Let this please be a lesson to those of you who post information about yourself on the internet, some people will attempt to use this information against you. The info that is being threatened to be sent to my boss are posts in which I was overly honest, I was naive to the fact someone might me compiling these confessions to use against me. I was trying to share my own experiences and opinions about treatment and AA related topics and rather than argue with people, reach down deep into myself and pull these old memories out to share with a group of internet strangers. This process is not easy and this blackmailing attempt has not made things any easier. But it did give me a chance to think, and reassess my convictions and morals. I have been tested, and I choose to stand with truth and openness and continue to share my experiences and opinions here. Lying to paint your opposition as insane is not an acceptable way to win an argument.
I'm sure this will result in my "punishment", but I don't care at this point in my life. I earned my right to my opinions with what I went through, and this forum invites all opinions for an "open free for all" discussion. I think it is some of you who need to do a moral inventory of yourselves and begin to question your own convictions and values. I am not a program parent, like I was blackmailed into saying earlier in this thread. I was a troubled teen who was sent to multiple treatment programs, one of which has its own forum on this website, and so I choose to speak about it. I don't lie or make things up, I am open and honest and this bothers some people here, obviously. But I think you should open your mind to allow the possibility that some people might have actually been helped in a program. I can honestly say, and I swear to God this is true, if I wasn't sent to treatment and the program I would have almost certainly died, or ended up in jail. There is no doubt whatsoever of that in my own mind. I wouldn't of admitted that a few years ago, but maturity and finally developing the ability to empathize with other's positions, such as my parents, helped me understand the larger picture. It's easier to think of yourself as a victim, and not take personal accountability for your own decisions and actions. But doing so leaves you on a level of misunderstanding your own motives and never really knowing yourself. I know myself well now, and know what is truth and what is not. I am standing up for freedom of speech and I am proclaiming right now that I refuse to be bullied into silence. Do your worst.
Aah. So you found a fifth option. Claim to stand up for free speech in the face of losing your job and homelessness. Good job. Too late, though.
One of your friends PM'ed me earlier to let me know I was right about you being PosterX, urging me to move on because you really did feel threatened and were just trying to prove a point. Well he/she might believe that but I certainly do not. You cried wolf. If you had really been threatened or blackmaled you would have posted that rather than having to resort to making up this disgusting chirade.
You lied there, SUCK IT. How is anybody to know whether you were in a program or not. I mean it wasn't too long ago you were claiming to be richer than any of us, lounging around on the beach. I have a good guess as to who you might be (same person Che suspects) but even that person wouldn't go to such lengths to support a program that traumatized him to the point where a car approaching from behind could send him into a panic attack -- beating on the hood of the car in front of his girlfriend. No. I don't believe he would flip so far over to the other side. Then again, maybe you are him and you feel better with the illusion that somehow what you went through had some meaning, that somehow they helped you, that somehow you caused it and therefore are in total control of your future.
You are responsible for your actions, but only your actions. What happened to you,
what was done to you, was wrong. There ARE victims in this life. You don't choose to be a victim. Others do that for you, which is exactly what makes it so traumatic. People who have power over others often do abuse that power and there is no shame at all in being on the receiving end. Even if in some way you put yourself "on the train tracks" as Erhard would say, it still does not excuse those who were supposed to be taking care of you for their actions. What went on and what goes on in WWASP programs is by any publicly accepted standard of decency, abuse. They hurt you. You were a victim. It doesn't mean you're powerless but you aren't god either. It doesn't mean you deserved it or caused it and no matter what the result,
it was wrong. Abuse is not the way to help kids. The Hobbit, Cat 4s, cat 5s, duct tape, dog cages. These are serious criminal matters. Who cares what others such as your parents think. Empathizing with a point of view and agreeing are two different things, and
if you're parents knew and approved of what went on, they're just as guilty as the program. They might show you compassion as you hit troubled times, they might show you love, but
conditional acceptance and support is not love. It's simply a desire for control, sometimes borne out of love but other times it's just a desire to make you in their image.
I feel sad for you. I really do. If you are who I think you are. You were once so fragile, hurt but full of emotion and compassion. You were able to sway the views of others. You were able to convince parents of things even I couldn't dream possible. You might look back on that and see it as a sign of sickness but I saw a guy with a heart. Now all i see, all i feel, is hate. Your very name symbolizes what you have become. You're devoid of compassion, you see victims as having deserved what they god, having put themselves in the situation. I can't imagine the amount of hate you must feel towards yourself.
Someday, maybe, you'll remember who you were and find the good among the fragile.
