Academy at Sisters

[MorganMDC]

my daughter did so well at ASR

Ohhhh, so "did so well" is just another way of saying "lost a year of academic credit, took five years to finish high school, drank and did drugs."  Got it.  Nice to know you have some whole other version of the English language to suit your agenda.

See what I'm saying, Morgan?  This is the typical program experience and because it set someone back $60-$80 grand they feel this intense need to try to spin it as "did so well," or have to admit they wasted their money and their kids' time.  This is what these folks cling to like a life raft.  And when you just point it out they accuse you of being "upset" over their "success."  You can't make it up.

Maybe if you ask him some questions he'll answer you instead of just trying to assign some of his own emotions to you.

Here's one to start:
If your daughter was "well ahead academically" why did it take five years to graduate high school instead of three or four?

Be patient, and keep asking until you get an answer that doesn't require a "George Orwell 1984 decoder ring" to decipher...

Good luck.

The bold was hilarious, just had to say.
See, I'd love to get some straight answers.
Appears no one will.

[Pile of Dead Kids]

Instead of this useless back-and-forth over getting straight information from the program, why don't you call fucking Bend High School and ask *them* what the situation is?

[Joel]

Edited: Wednesday, October 06, 2010

[Pile of Dead Kids]

Calling Phil Elberg was on page 1 of the thread. Might be a good time to return to that.

[DannyB II]

Whooter posted anon for a while when he came back after dropping his old username "TheWho."  You can start reading here to get the flow of the conversation and a few posts below Whooter (posting anon) says his daughter actually dropped out of high school and it eventually took her 5 years to graduate because the 16 months she spent at ASR didn't count for any high school credits.  For what it's worth, at the time she was there, ASR was legally barred from issuing state diplomas and was not accredited at all, contrary to what Whooter says in this thread.  In the link above he even says they were working on accreditation.

He also says she was smoking pot and drinking.  Dropping out + still using drugs + still drinking underage does not = "the program was successful" IMHO.  Rather it seems to have been a complete waste of time and money, not to mention setting her back 16 months academically.

Please, Morgan, let your parents know about these programs that are not allowed to issue high school credits.  I did a quick search on the Academy at Sisters on the Oregon department of Education website (you can enter the search terms "Academy at Sisters" here and see for yourself) and for the years they have data they show no graduates went on to college after leaving there.  They only "graduate" about 4 kids per year as well.

DJ, I am not trying to be a "kill joy" here but why do we have to drag Morgan all through this, it is the message that is important, if the message is true it does not make a difference who it comes from, we are trying to help her right. You are trying to keep her out and whooter is discussing options if she does go. Both need to be discussed objectively, whether we like it or not.

[Awake]

Morgan I can tell you are already able to make the changes this program will contrive out of you.  You are going to learn the lesson of accepting punishment  as ‘help’ AND either liking it or acting like you like it.


Either way you are going learn to do things with a good attitude.  I don’t know how to say this really, but could you give yourself an attitude adjustment with respect to the potential alternatives?  By that I mean you can’t just ‘agree’ to go to local counseling, you have to ‘want’ it.  That’s the way it will be, don’t think you’re strong enough to resist it there, so, might as well express that you get this point now.  

As bizarre of advice as this is you might want to take it seriously.  Let your parents know you have had a vision of your future, and you realize that no matter what, you are going to learn to ‘do it and like it’, so you’d prefer to learn how to do that your own way instead of be made to.  I’m not going to beat around the bush here. This is the end game, not sure if everyone is going to admit they know that’s the truth, but this is a lot better way to get to the same end.  If you can actually do this, somehow find a way to want it, even if your motivation is avoidance of a worse sentence, then you get it! You get the program! What you will do in a year, at much pain and cost, you can do right now! Promise your parents they don’t have to do this, tell them you’ll do what they want and you’ll try to do it with a smile. What more could your parents ask?

[DannyB II]

Morgan I can tell you are already able to make the changes this program will contrive out of you.  You are going to learn the lesson of accepting punishment  as ‘help’ AND either liking it or acting like you like it.


Either way you are going learn to do things with a good attitude.  I don’t know how to say this really, but could you give yourself an attitude adjustment with respect to the potential alternatives?  By that I mean you can’t just ‘agree’ to go to local counseling, you have to ‘want’ it.  That’s the way it will be, don’t think you’re strong enough to resist it there, so, might as well express that you get this point now.  

As bizarre of advice as this is you might want to take it seriously.  Let your parents know you have had a vision of your future, and you realize that no matter what, you are going to learn to ‘do it and like it’, so you’d prefer to learn how to do that your own way instead of be made to.  I’m not going to beat around the bush here. This is the end game, not sure if everyone is going to admit they know that’s the truth, but this is a lot better way to get to the same end.  If you can actually do this, somehow find a way to want it, even if your motivation is avoidance of a worse sentence, then you get it! You get the program! What you will do in a year, at much pain and cost, you can do right now! Promise your parents they don’t have to do this, tell them you’ll do what they want and you’ll try to do it with a smile. What more could your parents ask?

Now Morgan I have not had much to say to you, why?? others are doing just fine but my friend you just got some of the best advice your going to get right here.
Awake just laid it out in very simple terms, Pile also came right to the point twice in his last posts. This is where the rubber hits the road, girl. It is your move.
Please know we/I care deeply for your safety.

[MorganMDC]

Morgan I can tell you are already able to make the changes this program will contrive out of you.  You are going to learn the lesson of accepting punishment  as ‘help’ AND either liking it or acting like you like it.


Either way you are going learn to do things with a good attitude.  I don’t know how to say this really, but could you give yourself an attitude adjustment with respect to the potential alternatives?  By that I mean you can’t just ‘agree’ to go to local counseling, you have to ‘want’ it.  That’s the way it will be, don’t think you’re strong enough to resist it there, so, might as well express that you get this point now.  

As bizarre of advice as this is you might want to take it seriously.  Let your parents know you have had a vision of your future, and you realize that no matter what, you are going to learn to ‘do it and like it’, so you’d prefer to learn how to do that your own way instead of be made to.  I’m not going to beat around the bush here. This is the end game, not sure if everyone is going to admit they know that’s the truth, but this is a lot better way to get to the same end.  If you can actually do this, somehow find a way to want it, even if your motivation is avoidance of a worse sentence, then you get it! You get the program! What you will do in a year, at much pain and cost, you can do right now! Promise your parents they don’t have to do this, tell them you’ll do what they want and you’ll try to do it with a smile. What more could your parents ask?

This advice would have been helpful two weeks ago.
My parents have made the final decision, all that's left now, is to prepare.
I did act as though I "wanted it", and was pretty convincing, because it was the truth.
I want it more than the program.
Apparently, there is something in my own situation I am missing.
"Danny B", to preserve said safety, all that's left is preparation.
I don't see any way of getting out of this program now.

[Whooter]

Morgan, You will come out of the program ready to go (I can almost assure you).  Stay focused on what you want for yourself (not what others want for you).  You don’t have a choice (right now) on what road to take but you do have a choice on what direction you are going to go in.  You can choose to do the academics and work on your personal self and issues and mature beyond your peers at home.  Make the program work to your advantage and get yourself ready for the UK…… The time and work in the program will give you new perspective on your family situation also.

Most of all don’t be frightened by all the negative experiences you have read about here.  The experience you have is up to you.



...

[Paul St. John]

And you will be..lol... far more prepared then most.

It was very intelligent of you to do your own research, and you will reap some rewards from it.

I wish ya the best here.  I think that what is being done to you is wrong, and I won't lie about that.  It is very clear that the adults in your life are choosing to focus on the bad things about you, and find ways to remedy them.

But it is also very clear that there is a lot of good about you, that they just take for granted, rather then fanning the flame.

It is ashame Morgan, and I think that for the most part, you are on your own.  I think that the best you can do, is make peace with yourself in all ways that you can.  You have to be strong.

I read your mother's post, and no offense, but I don t believe her, completely.  In my view, the towel is being thrown in, and your mother is saying that either she is too weak to parent you, or that you are just so absolutely horrible, that you cannot be parented, which we know is not true.

I think that you have to count on yourself. To me, what is more important, is not whether or not, you lose a year of academics, but that you remember what your goals are, throughout the process, and you come out, still, having them.  You should remind yourself often of what they are, and why you want them, while you are there.  Also, my opinion, is that you will get your school credits.  I would think that your parents have made some assurance of that.  I know that the place that I went, the schoolwork was like elementary school, but I still got passed in all my grades.

Also, you could call that bend high school as was suggested.  That was a very sensible suggestion. I got a feeling your mind is probably not fully on that though.

Paul

PS  You still havent fully accepted it yet.  Not reallly.  This isn t real to you yet.

[Pile of Dead Kids]

Also, my opinion, is that you will get your school credits.  I would think that your parents have made some assurance of that.

You'd think wrong, Paul- as noted by earlier in the thread, the parents have no clue whether or not the credits are in any way real.

PS  You still havent fully accepted it yet.  Not reallly.  This isn t real to you yet.

This, this, a million times this.

[MorganMDC]

Morgan, You will come out of the program ready to go (I can almost assure you).  You don’t have a choice (right now) on what road to take but you do have a choice on what direction you are going to go in.  You can choose to do the academics and work on your personal self and issues and mature beyond your peers at home.  
The experience you have is up to you.



...

I would love to see the results of people coming out of AAS, Besides those on myspace which aren't clear.
It seems no one has.
They don't prepare you for anything, not even what will change going in, so it's a big shady mystery.

Paul St. John,
I thank you for your kind words.
None taken. I didn't buy much of it either.
It gives you a sense that I lie compulsively , and have some sort of other issue that she failed to name.
I am not a compulsive lier, and I know my weaknesses, and will face them.
"She just doesn't know how to parent me" as she says. Should I have to suffer for that by losing a year+ in a program? She thinks so.
I haven't excepted this yet, no.
I have however come to terms with it.
I know I'll make it through, and do what is necessary, but I haven't yet excepted that this is what I've gotten myself into.
It's just a bit tough to fathom.

[Paul St. John]

Morgan, there are some things you should know....

Right now, you are learning about the programs, and getting details on them, and thinking about what it is going to be like when you get there....

But you are doing it from the comfort of your bedroom, and conversing with us on your very own PC.

You are probably talking a lot with your friends about it on the phone, and when you hang out with them.

When you get there, you will be inside the program.  You will no longer be looking at it.

Right now, you are Morgan.  Once, you get there, you will quickly become, Morgan, the program member. Things will change drastically.  

All your comforts will be gone. Your past will mean little, and they will start to carry out the job of rewriting you. You should know this.

Paul

[MorganMDC]

Morgan, there are some things you should know....

Right now, you are learning about the programs, and getting details on them, and thinking about what it is going to be like when you get there....

But you are doing it from the comfort of your bedroom, and conversing with us on your very own PC.

You are probably talking a lot with your friends about it on the phone, and when you hang out with them.

When you get there, you will be inside the program.  You will no longer be looking at it.

Right now, you are Morgan.  Once, you get there, you will quickly become, Morgan, the program member. Things will change drastically.  

All your comforts will be gone. Your past will mean little, and they will start to carry out the job of rewriting you. You should know this.

Paul

I am aware of this.
I know all the therapy is going to be a load of, well, bullshit running wild.  :bs:  :bs:  :bs:  :bs:
I have no intention of losing my goals, and my past, nor my personality.
All I can do is study their psychological tactics - or the ones they claim to use, - from home, and prepare to -for lack of a better pair of words - be mind-fucked.

[Awake]

No. She cannot ‘choose to work on her personal self and issues.’ This is coming under explicit, forced direction with the threat of punishment. This situation robs her of that possibility.