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Author Topic: One other thing too...  (Read 1571 times)

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Offline starry-eyed pirate

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One other thing too...
« on: October 25, 2008, 12:17:56 AM »
...that was really super-messed up about Straight Inc. was how you weren't allowed to defend yourself at all for even the slightest little thing that you might 'a' done questionable... ::) I'unno' but seems like being overly open to criticism in this harsh world would be a mistake.  Now, I aint no pussy, let's be clear about that, but I remember when I was in the 10th grade at Woodson high school, in the boys room, readin the wall above the urinal, and it read:"Straight is a pussy factory".  I don't remember what I thought at the time but now I see what was meant by that.  

The way the people in group are conditioned day after day to "open up"...to "surrender their will"...this is all a bunch 'a' mularkey.  If you were accused of absolute absurdities in group, there was no way to defend yourself.  The group and staff would not allow for any defense at all.  The person was opened up against their will and intensely criticized simply for the sake of the psychologic breakdown that would result.  There was no common reason for it otherwise.  Man that place was just no good!!  Man, they really mess you up.  I mean, even just now, this is comin to me...the way they disable you psychologically...

It's all just some illusion they wanted to attach me to though, some fantasy of theirs,...some manifestation of their fears...

If you were in $tr8 or one of these other programs, the  way that they attacked you had nothin to do with you, or who you were or what you did, it was just the way they got inside your head and manipulated you and chained you.

Power to the people!(fist in the air!)
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 07:00:00 PM by Guest »
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Offline Anonymous

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Re: One other thing too...
« Reply #1 on: October 25, 2008, 12:38:04 AM »
I always wondered about that"manistifation of fears " Idea hadnt thought of it in ages,but,I know what you mean,exactly.and like Peter Gabriel said



                                                                               FEAR IS THE MOTHER OF VIOLENCE
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 07:00:00 PM by Guest »
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Offline Froderik

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Rant Against The 'Gram
« Reply #2 on: October 25, 2008, 12:39:07 AM »
Quote from: "starry-eyed pirate"
...that was really super-messed up about Straight Inc. was how you weren't allowed to defend yourself at all for even the slightest little thing that you might 'a' done questionable... ::) I'unno' but seems like being overly open to criticism in this harsh world would be a mistake.  Now, I aint no pussy, let's be clear about that, but I remember when I was in the 10th grade at Woodson high school, in the boys room, readin the wall above the urinal, and it read:"Straight is a pussy factory".  I don't remember what I thought at the time but now I see what was meant by that.  

The way the people in group are conditioned day after day to "open up"...to "surrender their will"...this is all a bunch 'a' mularkey.  If you were accused of absolute absurdities in group, there was no way to defend yourself.  The group and staff would not allow for any defense at all.  The person was opened up against their will and intensely criticized simply for the sake of the psychologic breakdown that would result.  There was no common reason for it otherwise.  Man that place was just no good!!  Man, they really mess you up.  I mean, even just now, this is comin to me...the way they disable you psychologically...
Yeah, that particular line of bullshit that went something like, "If it doesn't 'apply,' don't worry about it; don't get defensive."

That conditioning puts a spin on things when I 'get into it' with people even now. I have over-reacted in situations like that (when people criticize me for defending myself) and understandably so. But backing up a bit....right after I got out it was like I was unsure how to talk to people sometimes, didn't know what to say, so i would just say nothing at all...I'd get stymied, or just walk away, which would not go over well with people at times. Nowadays I'm like, "Fuck it, I'm not taking shit off this person if I don't have to..." and proceed to blast them verbally if they push it too hard....which is also fucked up...but I'll take it over that post-program awkwardness any day...

Yes, their fuckin' fears! It's funny how people project like this and abuse others in their own ways. We witnessed it up close and ugly-like back then.... so we see it coming from a mile away now....
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Offline starry-eyed pirate

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Re: One other thing too...
« Reply #3 on: October 25, 2008, 12:46:55 AM »
...and you were under constant pressure the entire time to constantly self-analyze and self-criticize, so we were trained and conditioned to surrender our natural autonomy.  Know what I'm sayin ??  They turned us into people who valued self-improvement over self-defense.
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Offline Froderik

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Re: One other thing too...
« Reply #4 on: October 25, 2008, 12:53:00 AM »
Quote from: "starry-eyed pirate"
...and you were under constant pressure the entire time to constantly self-analyze and self-criticize, so we were trained and conditioned to surrender our natural autonomy.  Know what I'm sayin ??  They turned us into people who valued self-improvement over self-defense.
Which is just plain irrational; how can you really improve yourself with no means to stand up for yourself first? It's total bullshit.
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Offline starry-eyed pirate

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Re: Rant Against The 'Gram
« Reply #5 on: October 25, 2008, 01:02:40 AM »
Remember how much pressure there was though to always, and I mean at any time be prepared to stand up and be self-critical to the extent to which you were completely "powerless" over your self ??  Or just the pressure of sitting in group and being ready with some "past incident" or song and dance about how you're workin your program to avoid the temptations of the world ??  Man, That was all fucked up!  I think that kind of stress messes you up bad

Quote from: "Froderik"
I'll take it over that post-program awkwardness any day.
 

Oh Man!!!  You aint kiddin!!!  Did we get hued or what !!!
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Offline Froderik

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humita humita humita...
« Reply #6 on: October 25, 2008, 01:13:53 AM »
Quote from: "starry-eyed pirate"
Did we get hued or what !!!
Huuuuaghhh! A totem pole with no vaseline!!!
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Offline starry-eyed pirate

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Re: One other thing too...
« Reply #7 on: October 25, 2008, 01:16:40 AM »
:D (LOL)
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If you would have justice in this world, then begin to see that a human being is not a means to some end.  People are not commodities.  When human beings are just to one another government becomes obsolete and real freedom is born; SPIRITUAL ANARCHY.

Offline Froderik

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Re: One other thing too...
« Reply #8 on: October 25, 2008, 08:58:02 AM »
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Offline Antigen

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Re: One other thing too...
« Reply #9 on: October 25, 2008, 12:46:46 PM »
Well let's see what we can do about that...
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"Don\'t let the past remind us of what we are not now."
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Offline starry-eyed pirate

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Re: One other thing too...
« Reply #10 on: October 26, 2008, 12:21:50 AM »
Quote from: "Guest"
I always wondered about that"manistifation of fears " Idea hadnt thought of it in ages,but,I know what you mean,exactly.and like Peter Gabriel said



                                                                               FEAR IS THE MOTHER OF VIOLENCE

Yes.  ...and the whole thing is built by fearful people...   Those that fear not seek not to control others...
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Offline starry-eyed pirate

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Re: One other thing too...
« Reply #11 on: October 26, 2008, 01:32:02 AM »
...Or am I just another...police state dooms-sayer...
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Offline starry-eyed pirate

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Re: One other thing too...
« Reply #12 on: October 26, 2008, 01:51:02 AM »
You know what I'm sayin though right  ??  How if you were stood up in group for anything you had to be ready with an entire line of conscious awareness or some shit to fend off all the opportunistic phasers waitng to advance...the way we looked around at each other and somehow communicated despite the controlled environment we were in...Yeah man we were all communicating... all kin'a' heavy stuff...Dang, I was relieved to have a song.  It meant time to myself...time I could just sing..messed up as I know it was now.  Because we all knew where we were when we looked around at each other like that...you had to be ready...
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Offline Froderik

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Re: One other thing too...
« Reply #13 on: October 26, 2008, 10:09:44 AM »
Quote from: "starry-eyed pirate"
You know what I'm sayin though right  ??  How if you were stood up in group for anything you had to be ready with an entire line of conscious awareness or some shit to fend off all the opportunistic phasers waitng to advance...
Absolutely; sooner or later you learned that you had to be ready to "talk a good game," for when you got called on. Better not flounder while you were standing up in group, or else! (I learned this the hard way.)

Quote
the way we looked around at each other and somehow communicated despite the controlled environment we were in...Yeah man we were all communicating... all kin'a' heavy stuff...Dang, I was relieved to have a song.  It meant time to myself...time I could just sing..messed up as I know it was now.  Because we all knew where we were when we looked around at each other like that...you had to be ready...
We subconsciously learned from one another how to play the game, on a collective level; we showed each other how to get by via example when we could, I guess. (I infer that you're talking about something more than playing "eye-games" here.) Yes, at least while we were singing those songs we weren't having to be on our guard like we had to be during the raps.

Quote
...Or am I just another...police state doom-sayer...
That fear and imagined need for control was in our faces; we got a close look at the face of that beast before we got eaten...
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Offline Anonymous

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Re: One other thing too...
« Reply #14 on: October 26, 2008, 11:41:48 AM »
Frod says: " Yes, at least while we were singing those songs we weren't having to be on our guard like we had to be during the raps."

Ahh, this brings back some of them more recluse memories. Rocking out while singing the more stupidest of songs, then going into a sort of divinely inspirational emotional state while singing grand ol flag or better yet, zippity doo dah, LOL. Good point Frod, although there were times when the songs just delayed that inevitable 'I just put my nose in the garbage disposal' confrontation. This has bugged me for the longest time... That "Wee I Wee I Warrior" song, about the mom killing her baby. ARGH!!! We only sang that one a handful of times, and damn near every  Virginia/St Pete survivor I've talked to can't remember it, but what's weird is I remember it like we just got done singin the damn thing... The song was very um, violent and criminal in nature. It would be rated NC17 or X for gore and scenes of brutal murder with a knife. When singin it, the whole group would get all worked up like they just scored a touchdown on Mars. The song was also called "Tom Sawyer" and was not related in any way to that Rush tune.

What was the goal of this subconcious indoctrination of the mind by childish and violent tunes?

FD
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