Treatment Abuse, Behavior Modification, Thought Reform > Hyde Schools
follow-up questions on Hyde School
Anonymous:
--- Quote ---On 2005-11-12 04:31:00, Anonymous wrote:
"
Perhaps the parents bear some modest responsibility for choosing to share this information in the seminar. But, the bottom line is that Hyde's destructive and negligent model is designed to elicit this kind of self-disclosure. The peer pressure and brainwashing are tremendous influences. In the end, Hyde must accept that it lays the foundation for these very inappropriate scenes. Hyde staff know that the seminars often entail intense, intimate self-disclosure that leads to conflict, emotional distress, and so on. The fact that Hyde promotes and encourages these exchanges is pure negligence, particularly when the group facilitators are so incredibly unskilled and untrained when it comes to handling such complicated mental health issues.
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After being in many seminars at Hyde, (FLC's, family weekends) IMHO the parents don't bare any responsibility for this encounter. Hyde absolutely promotes this type of encounter and in fact there is a sick voyereurism that exists at Hyde. Hyde will accuse you of holding back if you don't divulge all your personal "secrets" and there will be tremendous peer pressure put on you.
This is why so many parents completely walk away from Hyde after dropping out or graduating. Most parents feel ashamed by what is known by perfect strangers about themselves. It is psychologically humiliating knowing that these strangers are aware of every detail in your life. Being a part of Hyde means stripping away every last detail of ones personal life in front of not only other parents, but young kids and their sisters and brothers. What in the world is a 50 year old doing telling a bunch of kids about infidelity, homosexuality, former drug use, and suicidal tendencies? Sorry, but I do consider this child abuse when children are exposed and forced to hear these things. The students do not have a choice. They are not allowed to walk out of these seminars or they will be punished.
Parents beware! Yes, Hyde is all the things you are reading about in these posts, and yes Hyde does work for some, but at what cost?"
--- End quote ---
This parent's experience is very similar to our own. We too felt like voyeurs when parents and students shared some of the most intimate details of their lives. During breaks and after seminars I heard a number of people comment that they felt forced to disclose information they didn't want to to disclose in order to play Hyde's "game." Everyone who has spent a few months at Hyde knows the drill: You better volunteer your share of intimate details or you'll be accused of holding back and being unwilling to look at your own issues. If you fail to confront other group members you're accused of not being part of the group, not holding others accountable, etc.
As with all cults, some people buy in and stay in. Some parents feel like this is the price they have to pay to keep their child at Hyde, particularly since the child had so much difficulty at other schools, was expelled, etc. Others realize, over time, that at Hyde they've been pulled into something nefarious and damaging. A number of people posting on this website obviously get to a point where they feel sullied by the whole experience and can't bear to continue. These families (ours included) reach a point where they felt like their hands are so dirty from the experience that they decide they have to flee. That's our experience, and we now feel obligated to share it with parents who are at Hyde or thinking about enrolling at Hyde.
Anonymous:
--- Quote ---On 2005-11-09 19:51:00, Anonymous wrote:
"Yes - the seminars--- where is the accrediting board? Reading other parents' experiences of the FLC's, wilderness retreats and seminars brings it all back to me. These were awful times and they were awful not because I did not want to 'face my family issues'. They were awful because they were wrong.
Thankfully I did not bring my other children, as we were often told to.
I do not know how to deal with the memories of what I've heard in the seminars, or my own unresolved participation. So many times people would be crying - it was horrific what was unleashed. We all have issues in our lives, some alot more serious than others. I am forever dismayed that my child witnessed and heard what he did without the benefit of having the painful memories dredged up by people treated in the right way. Reading other parents' posts makes me realize how angry I am, and how much more I need to understand how to heal myself from those times. How can the school stay accredited?"
--- End quote ---
Our family also feels intense anger toward Hyde because of what we've witnessed in seminars (mostly the FLCs and some family weekend seminars). We can't believe we've participated in these inappropriate, often damaging discussions. We now wish we had shown more courage and challenged this horrible practice. The problem is that many parents try to make it work and give Hyde the benefit of the doubt while they're at the school. Many parents are afraid to speak up out of fear that they or their child will suffer terrible emotional repercussions from Hyde staff. For many of us it has taken quite a long time to realize how unprofessional and destructive many of these seminars are. If only the media and state officials really knew about some of the emotional abuse and Hyde's unprofessional techniques.
Anonymous:
--- Quote ---On 2005-11-10 23:25:00, Anonymous wrote:
"
--- Quote ---There was a parent in our "region" who went to an FLC and came back needing to go to the doctor who then put him on strong meds! The doctor told him that because of the trauma he was forced to dig up at the school, he was in dire need of a psychologist at once! I am not exaggerating about this one bit! I was told first hand.
This father ended up having to go on anti-anxiety drugs. It was clear that Hyde had pushed him too far to an area of his life that Hyde was not prepared or capable of dealing with and neither was the husband.
--- End quote ---
Funny thing, perspective. I actually have no problem with this. People only dig up what they want to dig up, and if it was that traumatic (what he dug up) that he had to go on meds, the real question is, where is he today? That someone has to go on meds as a result of a realization about their past is fairly routine stuff and not in and of itself, evidence of abuse. And when that level of stuff comes up, it doesn't get resolved over night. Sounds like it was profoundly deep, he sought professional help, and I would hope for him that his life took a dramatic turn at that point which he doesn't regret.
Point being, we don't know what happened and the conclusion that Hyde "pushed him too far" is fairly self-serving. You might also say, Hyde opened a door and he stepped through it....but in my experience, no one goes anywhere that deep until they are ready."
--- End quote ---
Interesting "Anonymous" how you "have no problem with this." Who in the hell are you that you are deciding what is healthy for a person to go through emotionally? Are you a Doctor? Psychiatrist? Psychologist? You say, "Hyde opened a door and he stepped through it." I find your comments incredibly arrogant! This is so typical of a staff at Hyde. They do believe they are above everyone else, and you speak just like the rest of them! I believe you are drinking the same Kool Aid as Tom Cruise.
Anonymous:
--- Quote ---On 2005-11-27 20:37:00, Anonymous wrote:
"
--- Quote ---
On 2005-11-10 23:25:00, Anonymous wrote:
"
--- Quote ---There was a parent in our "region" who went to an FLC and came back needing to go to the doctor who then put him on strong meds! The doctor told him that because of the trauma he was forced to dig up at the school, he was in dire need of a psychologist at once! I am not exaggerating about this one bit! I was told first hand.
This father ended up having to go on anti-anxiety drugs. It was clear that Hyde had pushed him too far to an area of his life that Hyde was not prepared or capable of dealing with and neither was the husband.
--- End quote ---
Funny thing, perspective. I actually have no problem with this. People only dig up what they want to dig up, and if it was that traumatic (what he dug up) that he had to go on meds, the real question is, where is he today? That someone has to go on meds as a result of a realization about their past is fairly routine stuff and not in and of itself, evidence of abuse. And when that level of stuff comes up, it doesn't get resolved over night. Sounds like it was profoundly deep, he sought professional help, and I would hope for him that his life took a dramatic turn at that point which he doesn't regret.
Point being, we don't know what happened and the conclusion that Hyde "pushed him too far" is fairly self-serving. You might also say, Hyde opened a door and he stepped through it....but in my experience, no one goes anywhere that deep until they are ready."
--- End quote ---
Interesting "Anonymous" how you "have no problem with this." Who in the hell are you that you are deciding what is healthy for a person to go through emotionally? Are you a Doctor? Psychiatrist? Psychologist? You say, "Hyde opened a door and he stepped through it." I find your comments incredibly arrogant! This is so typical of a staff at Hyde. They do believe they are above everyone else, and you speak just like the rest of them! I believe you are drinking the same Kool Aid as Tom Cruise. "
--- End quote ---
No where did I decide what was healthy. Someone posted a story and said it was bad. I say, not enough information to know if its good or bad. I do have some experiences where things like this are good, however, so yes, I can imagine a universe where this was all very positive.
IMHO, arrogant more appropriately fits with the original posters negative interpretation of the events. Who were they....doctor? Psychiatrist? No, just some observer with limited facts and a biased frame of reference.
My only point was: In the long run this may have been the most powerfully and positive transformative event in these peoples lives--and who is anyone here to say otherwise.
Anonymous:
"IMHO, arrogant more appropriately fits with the original posters negative interpretation of the events. Who were they....doctor? Psychiatrist? No, just some observer with limited facts and a biased frame of reference. "
There you go again! You say this was simply an observer with limited facts and a biased frame of reference. How do you know this Mr Arrogant? Did the poster say what he/she does for a living? Hyde has enrolled MANY kids whose parents are in the field of Psychology and just MAYBE this person is one of those! Your credibility will be much stronger if you stop assuming and stop being a "know it all!!"
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