I have so many excruciatingly vivid memories from just after straight. I remember putting on makeup for the first time, being outside and feeling the sun on my face. I remember picking out clothes to wear. I remember hanging out with these punk-rock people that I just met while I was a runaway, and I started telling them about how self-centered I used to be...They looked at me like where the hell did she come from? It was freaking hilarious. I just thought, well they are obviously full of it or something like that. What was wrong with me. One other thing I remember is after I went back to school, I couldn't figure out how to raise my hand. All I could think of was to motivate. Luckily, I was able to realize that would be strange, so I waited to see what other people did first. I guess that's why the program slowly integrates you back into regular life, something that I never went through. Oh yeah theres something else...I remember I made this new friend after I went back to school, and I explained to him how I had learned in straight that whenever you make fun of someone, it is a sign that you have low-self esteem. So from then on whenever we had anything critical to say about anyone, we would look at each other and just say, "low self esteem." And if it was particularly critical, we would say, "really low self esteem. " [ This Message was edited by: jane on 2005-01-07 10:54 ]
