Escuela Caribe ~ New Horizons

[Timoclea]

I'm very sorry that that happened to you.

Timoclea

In order to live free and happily you must sacrifice boredom. It is not always an easy sacrifice.
-- Richard Bach

[Dre]

The incident I am referring to happened to someone I knew who entered the program in 91.  Maybe there was more than one incident? I don't know.

I am very sorry that happened to you.  I will admit that as far as RG being a molester what I know is secondhand.  I sincerely apologize for offending you and for possibly getting the facts wrong.  

Being in the DR where we had no voice and where girls were preyed upon in my house was very frightening for me. I had a string of abusive hfs that stayed for short periods of time. Attracting qualified (well non-abusive...b/c the housestaff do not have to be certified) people is one of the program's downfalls.  That NHA kept on someone who had a history of looking at pornography (1990) and later made him a hf in a female household particularly when so many girls  had sexual abuse issues was blatantly irresponsible...and it is no wonder that later on this man molested someone. I regret that it happened to you.

I am glad that you were helped by the program. Not everyone was. Once again I am very very sorry about your experience.

[JB]

No, it's okay. Like I said, it was very hard for me up until the point he admitted it b/c everybody thought that I was lying. Maybe that is why I overreacted when I read that comment. I understand how rumors go, especially in a place like the program where no one can speak freely. And I had NO IDEA that RG had a history in the program with those things. That angers me to a whole new level that they let him stay. I guess the program will never cease to amaze me!

I have been reading everybody's comments and other than RG, I feel like I must have been lucky in my hfs. No one else did anything like that to me. In fact, two of the staff in the DR got married when they left, and about a year after I was out, I was alone on Thanksgiving, so they invited me to fly out and spend it with them, which I did. Although the program did help me, I DO understand how everyone feels. It was the absolute worst experience of my life, even if necessary. I kept in touch with a few people and watched them fall apart after we got out. And I still kinda blame the program for it.

I still have dreams where I am back in the DR and I can't get out. Do any of you dream that you are back there as opposed to flashbacks? Some family and friends suggested I go to Jarabacoa and visit the school and voluntarily 'leave' as theraputic so to convince myself that I can't be trapped there anymore. However, I really dont think I could be there again. Does anybody else think they COULD go back, even just to visit?

[Jewels]

I think I could visit. Just for that reason, I could leave at any time. I have even considere taking a vacation to the DR and visiting with my family. I know they would only let us see what they want us to, so I wouldn't expose my family to something abusive. Don't think I will ever be able to afford it, but have thought of it.

[Anonymous]

I think your reaction is completely natural. You were being preyed upon by an abuser, and even your highranker did not believe you.  You read a story that appeared to make light of your abuse, and you became angry.  It is okay.

No wonder M freaked out (in 96)---she knew what was going on. She had seen it before.

When I found out they kept on an abuser, it made me even more disgusted with the program. There are no checks and balances there...a student is powerless.  I remember being just miserable there with different abusive hfs...and my reaction was similar when I found out they kept him on after having a warning (pornography---not a Christian value!).  I was very angry.  When I knew RG he was just a teacher...not a hf in a girls' house.  Putting him in a girls' house was blatantly irresponsible...hence you were abused, as well as others.  That never should have happened. It made me very sad to hear of it...and sadder when I actually read a post from someone who had experienced abuse from him firtshand.

I would love to go back to the DR and visit the country.  I know I would be persona non grata on campus...but I think it would be great to sneak up the backside of the mountain to the pine forests. The pine forests were my favorite place.

I used to have bad nightmares a lot.  they have tapered off as I work through my issues.  It is part of having Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, which many students struggle with.

Alot of staff there were (are?) good. Understand I am not blatantly saying that there are no caring staff. But the way the program is set up there are no checks and balances ( no unmonitored phone calls, mail or visitors) so abuse occurs. Same thing happened in the stanford prison experiment in 1970(?). If a staff member has an unstable personality (many of those), the students pay the price.

Plus they label us students as rebellious or bad...which gives unstable members the amoral latitude to hurt kids. It also does a number on your self esteem.

The program is also a boot camp facility, which research says does not work.  No wonder many kids bomb out when they return home.

That's the main problem with teen (mis)treatment.  Most of what they use to treat us is not research driven. And because we were children we had no rights.

There are more people on the other site....
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Escuela_Caribe/
There have also been problems there too...disagreements b/w group members, etc., but I know there are several people there from your time.  You might want to check that out. It is good to reconnect with old friends.

Some people there were really hurt by the program and are blatantly against it; others praise it. At times people are intolerant.  I think we all have problems communicating---it is only natural after being banished to a 3rd world country during adolescence, which is a critical developmental stage in one's personality. So basically it is not a perfect place, but it is a place where former students can check in and discuss their experiences. There are several students from your time there.

Hope to see you there.

[JB]

Thanks for the kind words! Yeah, MG was a very nice woman. I had actually gotten pretty close to her in the few weeks I had been there. Another thing that you said about how she had seen it before makes sense b/c she DID believe me and kept yelling at him. Again, knowing now about his prior behavior totally fits into everything. I am still very angry with the fact that they let him stay AND moved him to a girls' housefather. That was extremely innappropriate! I have been thinking of this more lately and another thing that struck me as funny was I remember being so upset and concerned that they would take my 'grace week' away from me! Priorities right?

I would love to go to the DR again, i just dont know if i could. I studied spanish in college and will be getting my global business minor. I have always been interested in the culture since i was there. I look over my pictures all the time. I also took my journal from the DR when i left and read through that all the time. But those are more candid since we had to turn them in to our counselor. I remember one time i drew a picture of our work week and us digging ditches and picking and all that. I had a session about my bad attitude because of my cartoon!

Yeah, I saw that yahoo group link and i went to look at it. It said that you have to sign up and be approved so I went ahead and applied and am just waiting for a response. I did notice a few names that I knew from my time there and am excited to possibly talk to people again!

[Dre]

You had a session?  Swats?  for drawing a cartoon?

That is so ridiculous!  

Yeah, journals were a joke because you knew not to be real in them cuz if you were then you could get in trouble...at least that was what I sensed so my journals are just vague descriptions of day to day activities, with me occasionally skirting around issues that bothered me, but not really.  It was hard for me to be censored like that because I journaled since I was young...I did not write for years after I left the program, basically until I went into therapy a few years ago.

Of course, having journals read
(and being possibly punished for their content) completely destroys any sort of therapeutic value one could muster from such an activity.

MG was a nice woman.  I hear she is remarried; I hope happily.

[Jewels]

Could we ever be honest? Our journals would betray us, but so would the other people around us. Not that they necessarily wanted to, they had to to improve there own situation. Even when I tried to be honest I knew it couldn't be the whole truth. The ONE time I tried to talk openly, it backfired. I think I did open up in Canada, but only with a select few. You were damned if you did and damned if you didn't. If you were honest you had a "bad attitude" if you weren't, "you weren't facing reality".
 :silly:
enough to drive a person crazy

[JB]

MG remarried? That would be great for her. I hope she is happy. She really didnt deserve the situation she found herself in.

Yeah, my journals are day to day events and complete crap. But so are all my letters in and out. They are stupid. I was constantly being told to rewrite letters to my family for one reason or another.

So, i like the other yahoo group too. I just got into it yesterday. This is funny. I havent spoken to anyone in years and now i check both places before i even go to work!

Have a Great Day Everyone!

[Anonymous]

"These are not your typical well-adjusted (more or less) high school students. These students have already rejected a relationship with their parents and are involved in highly destructive activities (e.g., gangs, drug use or distribution, suicide attempts, living on the streets). Believe me, we want these kids to have a relationship with their family, and the "psychological disorientation" produced by "culture shock" is an important ingredient in helping the students to realize that they want to have a relationship with their family. We try to keep the environment as non-institutional as possible: students live in "houses" with houseparents. The key to success here is relationship and love. These kids (and families) have already had therapy (although we do that too), and it hasn't worked. We believe that it is through loving relationships that these kids will change."

I was in the DR and Canada, I got sent there for smoking weed, which i still enjoy doing from time to time.  I never had any prior counseling.  I am 25 now and just completed my masters degree.  I fronted my way through the program and completed so much school work my parents pulled me so I wouldnt graduate high school from a boot camp.  I was pretty much a perminent zero leveler, who was given so many bullshit "issues" to work on by unqualified staff members.  Shit, I was forced to teach myself calculus there when I was 16 and I got disciplined (swats and casitas) for falling behind with 8 terms a month.  The program is a scam, that gives unresponsible parents a way to even be more unresponsible.  It might work for some extreme kids, but definetly not the majority that go there

[Jewels]

On my way to church this morning. I couldn't help but think of sitting in church in the DR and listening to the cock fights just down the road. My kids didn't get it ... they don't even know what a cock fight is.

[Antigen]

On 2005-05-17 11:21:00, Anonymous wrote: ""These are not your typical well-adjusted (more or less) high school students.	Oh? Do tell
These students have already rejected a relationship with their parents	Who may well be lunatics and/or assholes.
and are involved in highly destructive activities (e.g., gangs, drug use or distribution, suicide attempts, living on the streets).	e.g. moodiness, acne, shyness, depression (see above) or just listening to devil music or making new friends.
Believe me, we want these kids to have a relationship with their family,	Believe you?! Your actions speak so loud, I can't hear what you're saying!
and the "psychological disorientation" produced by "culture shock" is an important ingredient in helping the students to realize that they want to have a relationship with their family.	We'll treat the little fucker so bad while they're down here, they'll feel priviledged to sleep on a straw mat at the foot of your bed if you want!
We try to keep the environment as non-institutional as possible: students live in "houses" with houseparents.	The environment? Or just the language? Noninstitutional? How about non-pow-camp?  :rofl: It's not like I've never heard anything about the place!
These kids (and families) have already had therapy (although we do that too), and it hasn't worked. We believe that it is through loving relationships that these kids will change."	Loving relationships? What about all the scrubbing and labour? Give me a friggen break!

I was in the DR and Canada, I got sent there for smoking weed, which i still enjoy doing from time to time.  I never had any prior counseling.  I am 25 now and just completed my masters degree.  I fronted my way through the program and completed so much school work my parents pulled me so I wouldnt graduate high school from a boot camp.  I was pretty much a perminent zero leveler, who was given so many bullshit "issues" to work on by unqualified staff members.  Shit, I was forced to teach myself calculus there when I was 16 and I got disciplined (swats and casitas) for falling behind with 8 terms a month.  The program is a scam, that gives unresponsible parents a way to even be more unresponsible.  It might work for some extreme kids, but definetly not the majority that go there "

"I predict, Sir, that you will die either by hanging or of some vile disease."
 "That all depends, sir, upon whether I embrace your principles or your mistress."
--Disraeli to Gladstone

[Anonymous]

Past students have set up a web site so others can visit and learn more about the abuse at New Horizons Youth Ministries.

NHYM is currently trying to get this site off due to the fact that they feel the truth is slander.

Please visit http://www.nhym-alumni.com and take a peak at what happened to some.

Gil

[crazycatliz]

Thankyou, antigen, that is just what I needed to hear. :smile:

[crazycatliz]

That is very meaningful, but how are we supposed to believe you if you are anonymous?