On 2006-07-11 06:45:00, Anonymous wrote:
"I'm sorry for what your going through with your twelve year old but asking for help on this web sight is not the answer as you can tell from the replies you've recieved. Talk to an education consultant on what is best for your child. Read some books or even check out the tv show Supper Nanny. If your looking for treatment check out some programs and ask for referals. I wish we were perfect like the people who replied to your cry for help but I'm sure all they were trying to do is help. "
Bwahahahahaha
Program trolls like to defend their rotten behavior by sarcastically implying that everyone who behaves better than them is presenting themselves as
perfect.
Of course we're not perfect parents. Neither were our own parents perfect. Some of the folks on here were the kids of Program Parents and have profitted by their parents' negative example---becoming good parents themselves.
Some folks, like me, had parents who weren't perfect but were sure as hell better than the Program Parents.
Obviously, I'm not a perfect parent. Just ask my kid. :smile: But I'm good enough to get by. Unlike the Program Parents.
Okay, the hard truth is that some parents give birth to the equivalent of Rosemary's Baby. Some kids are either born with serious damage, or get a bump on the head that does brain damage in some real bad places, or get abused by neighbors or relatives the parents had no reason to suspect.
I say this as someone with a Psychology degree from a top ten public university, who has kept up with this area of my field, including exhaustive reading on mental illness and criminology, since graduation sixteen years ago.
Some kids are damaged beyond repair.
Some of them are mentally ill. Medication will not cure them, but it can almost always stabilize them enough to be out of the psych ward almost all the time.
Programs won't cure the mentally ill. There is no cure. Researchers are trying to learn enough to find a cure, but they don't have one yet. They're close enough that they may have one in the kid's lifetime, but that's the best you can hope for.
Some of the kids are budding sociopaths. The problem with sociapaths is that their capacity for empathy is broken.
There is no cure for sociopathy, there are no effective treatments for sociopathy.
There is
some evidence that budding sociopaths, in the critical years before about age fifteen, can be helped to learn empathy in a real family home with loving parents.
That is the
only preventative criminal psychologists know of that can keep some of these at risk kids from becoming uncurable sociopaths.
For psychopaths, it's the same story only worse.
For sociopaths or psychopaths, the most critical thing broken is empathy. They don't have any.
The only thing that will help them at all is developing the capacity for empathy.
By forcing children to inform on, ridicule, be harsh with, and punish other children, the Program is a perfect prescription for how you turn an at risk kid into a hardened sociopath. It doesn't teach empathy, it does everything it can to squash it flat.
Setting fires is a very bad sign.
Sending a violently explosive kid who sets fires to a Program is like going out with him to kill kittens together.
Hey, let's squash any last vestiges of empathy and foster sadistic pleasure in the misery of others! What a great idea!
Not.
Julie
