When you say "grateful" it sounds metaphysical. Be greatful to yourself and yourself only for your accomplishments. Maybe thank your friends, whatever! But it's OK to be angry when the subject is Elan (therefor, your past, not present). Identifying anger based on a past experience doesn't mean you haven't overcome your traumas. Anyways, it's positive to reflect about the past and it very much helps you to put your future in perspective. I have to agree with one of the Elan stupid sentences that they made us write in our stupid plaques: "Those who forget their past are dommed to relive it".