drink a brewski and shut the fuck up

[Anonymous]

seriously. cedu still haunting your dreams? can't get over your shitty little experience?

anyone who went to cedu is lucky as fuck. anyone who had their rich parents dropping $60,000 a year has it fucking made. oh wow, sorry you had to sit in a circle and have some idiot staff member who gets paid less than your average janitor yell at you 3 times a week. if that shit actually got under your skin, you're just a pussy and you'd be unhappy no matter where the hell you were.

the bottom line is, cedu was the cushiest place ever. that place made everything easy for you. people sit around and bitch about how it fucked with their head, but it's all an excuse for something. that place was a fucking summer camp. easy academics, total freedom from any sort of true responsibility - what more could you really ask for?

cedu spoon fed everything to you. which is more than 2/3 of the world could ever even dream of. so stop fucking whining and admit how easy you had it.

[Anonymous]

I definitely agree that I could have been in much worse places. Much, much, worse indeed.

What program are you from? I'm curious.

[Anonymous]

staff, I'm sure, or ex-staff, I should say... Come on, at least be honest and tell us.  You sound pretty jealous, certainly not empathetic.  It sucked and you know it, whether we were rich or not.  Which yu weren't.

[Anonymous]

Nope, I was a student. My family isn't outrageously loaded, but my parents certainly don't clip coupons. You obviously missed the point. CEDU was a cakewalk. The only difficult thing was being forced away from your family, but most people there hated their family anyways.

People sit here and bitch about how much CEDU sucked, but they had it made. A 16 year old kid at CEDU had it a million times better than most of the 16 year old kids around the world. People want to sit here feeling bad for themselves because they got stuck at boarding school. Well guess what, you got as much food as you could stuff your face with three times a day. You had a warm bed to sleep in, all your needs were at your fingertips, you had people around you all the time that cared about you. How many fucking people in the world would give anything for just one of those?

Sitting here and bitching about CEDU is mindless and selfish. I can't even believe there are people on her whining about a staff member reading their mail or making them saw some wood while hundreds of thousands of people are sleeping on cots in the fucking Astrodome with their entire existences washed away by Katrina. And those are the lucky ones. Still wanna bitch about having your phone calls screened?

[puma046]

that's the truth. i didnt like being at bca but i  wouldnt the take the gamble of trading my life with some random other soul somewhere in the world. there are too many places where growing up to see the age of 16 is a small miracle in the first place.

[Anonymous]

haha you were there for how long..? maybe 6 months?.. it shows.
if you had graduated, you would have had a different opinion.

oh, and thanks for the grand fucking revelation that i could have been somewhere elsemuch worse.. shoulda coulda woulda.. blahblahblah.

[Anonymous]

CEDU wasn't a cakewalk, and I didn't hate my parents. It sucked, for sure, and while I'm not happy that i was sent away, I am not one of the whiners you mention.  It was tough being in an environment with a bunch of mostly asshole kids, but I made some friends who were stand up guys.  

What did you do after CEDU, and have you moved on?

[Anonymous]

Well it's pretty sad that grand revelation means nothing to you, but I'm definitely not going to sit here and try to change your mind. If you're closed off to the suffering of the world, as most of us Americans seem to be, then that's your call.

But once again you're way off base. No, I was not a staff. No, I wasn't there for only 6 months. I was there for 22 months and left about a week before my summit to go to post-graduate school.

To the other person who inquired, yes I have completely moved on. I don't praise CEDU and I don't bash it. It is what it is - just an experience in my past. Now I am in my second year at the Columbia University School of Law. You could say things are looking pretty good.

I don't think staying the extra month and some odd days would've changed my opinion one bit. Had I only been at CEDU for 6 months, I wouldn't have the nerve to be here saying these kinds of things.

[Anonymous]

On 2005-09-05 17:49:00, Anonymous wrote:

"Well it's pretty sad that grand revelation means nothing to you, but I'm definitely not going to sit here and try to change your mind. If you're closed off to the suffering of the world, as most of us Americans seem to be, then that's your call.



But once again you're way off base. No, I was not a staff. No, I wasn't there for only 6 months. I was there for 22 months and left about a week before my summit to go to post-graduate school.



To the other person who inquired, yes I have completely moved on. I don't praise CEDU and I don't bash it. It is what it is - just an experience in my past. Now I am in my second year at the Columbia University School of Law. You could say things are looking pretty good.



I don't think staying the extra month and some odd days would've changed my opinion one bit. Had I only been at CEDU for 6 months, I wouldn't have the nerve to be here saying these kinds of things. "

Not that staying for the Summit would have changed your mind, I'm sure it wouldn't have, but be glad you didn't go through it. It supremely sucked. Explaining the events now would just make you laugh, though. But going through it as a vulnerable, sleep deprived teen was quite disturbing. I thought Mel came up with some strange things, but those Lifespring fuckers are crazy. I can't believe free-thinking adults actually paid hundreds of dollars to willingly go through all of that bullshit.

But like I said before, I could have been in much worse places, and I feel that thinking that way gives me a certain amount of peace and gratitude. However, I think it's important for people not to get into a "their life sucks more than mine" contest, because it is important not to discount your own pain, if you are denying it or belittling it. But at the same time, I think that perspective IS important, especially if you are caught up in yourself or obsessing about a certain period of your life. I've read some of the accounts of Straight Inc and the Seed survivors and those places were incredibly harsh. So is juvie, and so was my "option." Despite the fact that CEDU/RMA was disturbing, (most of which I have come to terms with) I had it pretty good compared to other behavior mod places.

I'm curious, if CEDU was so cushy, why did you leave early? Couldn't the post-graduate program have waited for you to complete the summit, and you could have enrolled the next semester? What was your motivation for you not to complete CEDU? (I know how much importance they place on people completing the program. I mean, they put a HUGE amount of significance on the summit. Was it not important to you? And if so, why?) I'm not saying you didn't leave on benevolent terms, I'm just wondering.

I am also curious, what drew you to this forum? Was it purely to accuse and berate people for not being as "over it" as you are? (and if you have completely moved on from that experience entirely, why are you here? What made you think about CEDU again?) Were you surprised at what you found, when you saw people complaining about their time at CEDU? What did you hope to accomplish with your post?

Look, no accusations, here. I'm not saying you aren't truly "over it". There are lots of reasons people come here and post. I'm just wondering what those are for you, if you don't mind indulging me.

[Anonymous]

I really had no desire to stay for the summit. I had friends who went through it, told me the stories, and I just couldn't see it being something that was going to benefit me very much. I suppose I could've differed post-grad school for a semester, but because of how lacking CEDU's academics were (2 years of math, very basic science courses, etc.), I wanted to be as attractive to colleges as possible. I felt the only way to do that was put two semesters in at a good PG program. Curiosity about the summit sometimes gets to me, especially because I did put nearly 2 years into that school, but all in all I think I made the right decision.

The staff definitely tried to make me feel like an asshole for skipping out on the summit. While people who finished up the program got the whole hyped-up graduation, all I got was my diploma handed to me in front of the house and about 15 seconds to say a couple words before morning chores. Weak.

I came to this forum to get in touch with old friends. Immediately out of BCA I kept in touch with a lot of people, but it didn't take long to lose touch with all but one or two. Like you said, I made some great friends out there. I do think that CEDU was an easy place...the hardest times of my life came after graduating. So it was definitely in my best interest to have some of those guys in my corner to keep me on track, regardless of the fact that I'm from New England and most of them were from California.

I really have moved on completely though. Sometimes I even forget entirely that I went to a boarding school. I come on here and see people really struggling to let that place go, and I just feel bad. Sure, I think it's a good idea to identify your pain if it's there. I think this forum is great for kids that are fresh out and have no idea what life is about to hit them with. CEDU just didn't prepare kids for how harsh life really is. The world doesn't really give a fuck about you, but CEDU was stuck on this ideal that it should. I just don't feel it's right for people that have been out of there for nearly a decade or more to still be so hung up on it. Just doesn't seem healthy to me.

[Anonymous]

Oh, and I went to Boulder Creek.

[Anonymous]

On 2005-09-05 21:48:00, Anonymous wrote:

" I just don't feel it's right for people that have been out of there for nearly a decade or more to still be so hung up on it. Just doesn't seem healthy to me.



"

I agree. My situation is kind of weird. I'm an alumni from well before BCA even existed. I was over it. Worked through all of that pain, resentment and anger, as well as deprogramming myself, years ago. It entered into my mind sporadically, but not often. I think I checked online to see if RMA had a website once, out of curiosity, and that was right after Brown bought the schools in 1998. That was the last time I checked. Then last month, I inadvertantly found out about the schools closing, and also found out about those lawsuits from stuff that happened in the 90s in the process. I also found this place. For some reason, all of that crap made me start thinking about RMA again for the first time in years. So here I am. I don't know why I haven't gone away yet. Normally when I have thought about RMA in the past, it lasts for a few hours and then stops. (Maybe I'm just not as over it as I thought I was.) I fully admit that I did have some disturbing feelings when I found out about the lawsuits and the closings. I don't know why. I didn't know any of these people and I wasn't there when any of that shit happened.

I also totally agree that the school doesn't prepare you for the real world at all. I made an assload of social blunders after I left, and I'm perfectly capable of making those on my own, without the school's help anyway, thank you.

However, one of the few things I can say in its favor is that it kept me out of trouble for two and a half years, even though it did blow a lot of smoke up your butt about flowers and fairy tales and inner children.

[Anonymous]

On 2005-09-06 04:47:00, Anonymous wrote:

"

On 2005-09-05 21:48:00, Anonymous wrote:


" I just don't feel it's right for people that have been out of there for nearly a decade or more to still be so hung up on it. Just doesn't seem healthy to me.





"

I agree. My situation is kind of weird. I'm an alumni from well before BCA even existed. I was over it. Worked through all of that pain, resentment and anger, as well as deprogramming myself, years ago. It entered into my mind sporadically, but not often. I think I checked online to see if RMA had a website once, out of curiosity, and that was right after Brown bought the schools in 1998. That was the last time I checked. Then last month, I inadvertantly found out about the schools closing, and also found out about those lawsuits from stuff that happened in the 90s in the process. I also found this place. For some reason, all of that crap made me start thinking about RMA again for the first time in years. So here I am. I don't know why I haven't gone away yet. Normally when I have thought about RMA in the past, it lasts for a few hours and then stops. (Maybe I'm just not as over it as I thought I was.) I fully admit that I did have some disturbing feelings when I found out about the lawsuits and the closings. I don't know why. I didn't know any of these people and I wasn't there when any of that shit happened.



I also totally agree that the school doesn't prepare you for the real world at all. I made an assload of social blunders after I left, and I'm perfectly capable of making those on my own, without the school's help anyway, thank you.



However, one of the few things I can say in its favor is that it kept me out of trouble for two and a half years, even though it did blow a lot of smoke up your butt about flowers and fairy tales and inner children."

oh, and thanks for answering my questions.. (I was the guy from before.)