Don't think we were "stupid, lazy and cruel", but do agree that the family dynamics had failed. However, the teen needed to take ownership of his role in that failure- lying, stealing,drinking, wrecking cars, selling pot, not going to school.....
How about you "taking ownership" for your part in this? Instead of dumping the problem on a bunch of strangers, why don't you own up and work it out? Why are you so desperate to scam your way out of raising your kid?
Do you really consider sending a teen to a therapeutic program for a year or two "paying someone else to raise your child"?
Yes, I do. Raising a kid is not all fun and games. It also involves helping them through difficult situations. Instead of doing that, you just sent your kid off to be raised by strangers when things got a little rough. A year or two during the teenage years is a very long time. During that time, you have nothing to do with your teen's day-to-day life. In most programs, you are not even allowed free communication and visits with your own child. You are completely cut off of your child's life.
These "children" have become a threat to themselves and others.
Was your child suicidal? Assaultive? No? then, no, he/she was not a "threat to themselves and others".
If your child was/is suicidal/assaultive, seek *professional* help (that means professional psychiatrists/psychologists, not some underqualified "fix-a-teen" quack).
I still haven't heard any wisdom from you morons on a better way to address this. Let them go to jail? Let them have a fatal car accident? Let them destroy their home?
How about you getting involved? How about you talking to your kid for a change, finding out why they do the things they do. Behaviors don't come out of nowhere. There are reasons for all this. You talk about the benefits of "wilderness programs"-- how about you take that "wilderness trip" alongside your child? Take a break from the usual routine, in a neutral environment.
And here's a truly revolutionary idea: stick by your kid. Don't abandon them in a strange, oppressive, abusive program just because you got tired of being a parent.
It doesn't really matter what I'll say, though. You'll just going to try harder to justify your poor judgement and bad choices. You are just going to try harder to justify your choice to abandon your child when they needed you most. You are one sick individual.
