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Offline Anonymous

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Help me
« on: June 29, 2005, 10:33:00 PM »
I am a Cascade alum and I actuallu had a good experience there and it helped me out a lot.  My friend's daughter has been running away and cutting herself for the past year and her mother is at her wits end.  Can anyone refresh my memory and remind me if there are any "safe" and "good" wilderness programs and/or schools out there anymore?  I would truly appreciate the help.
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Offline Nihilanthic

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« Reply #1 on: June 29, 2005, 10:49:00 PM »
Um... why is this cutting such a danger she has to be sent off?

Also, how the fuck is marching in the "wilderness" or being locked up in a program gonna make her stop? Seriously, I wanna know.

Sure, they can take it away, but as soon as she gets out (and she will, you cant keep her there forever) she'll do it again.

Shes doing it to alleviate pain in her life. Try a therapist, or just try leaving good enough alone!

If shes been cutting for A YEAR its pretty unlikely shes going to actually hurt herself.

The inspiration of the Bible depends on the ignorance of the person who reads it.
--Robert G. Ingersoll, American politician and lecturer

« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 07:00:00 PM by Guest »
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DannyB on the internet:I CALLED A LAWYER TODAY TO SEE IF I COULD SUE YOUR ASSES FOR DOING THIS BUT THAT WAS NOT POSSIBLE.

CCMGirl on program restraints: "DON\'T TAZ ME BRO!!!!!"

TheWho on program survivors: "From where I sit I see all the anit-program[sic] people doing all the complaining and crying."

Offline Anonymous

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« Reply #2 on: June 30, 2005, 03:15:00 AM »
Cutting is a coping method. She needs to learn how to let go of that, and develop healthier ways to cope. That cannot be done without therapy. In a program, she will most likely be punished for cutting, instead of learning how she can stop and what coping methods she can use instead. Treating something like cutting takes *time*-- it can't be done in an 8-week hike. That girl will also need a lot of support from her family-- which is something she won't be able to get at a lockdown facility.

Stop looking for a program, and start looking for a good therapist.
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Offline OverLordd

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« Reply #3 on: June 30, 2005, 08:38:00 AM »
My friend who went to one of these schools still thinks about cutting her self, she had a fight with her mother and she called me up in tears asking if it would be alright to cut her self. (I have no clue why she called me to ask permission so dont ask.) I managed to talk her out of it after about 3 hours of my time. Then later she called me up asking for a straight razor so she could cut her self. The man is right cutting did not stop in a year and a half for my friend, it wont stop in 8 for a wilderness camp, hell she is out in the woods, she can hurt her self more (believe me, I camp.)
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our walking down a hallway, you turn left, you turn right. BRICK WALL!

GAH!!!!

Yeah, hes a survivor.

Offline Anonymous

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« Reply #4 on: July 02, 2005, 12:22:00 AM »
Well I think the thing your missing is WHY is she cutting? I know I cut because I was being abused by my step mom. I never slit my wrists. I just wanted to cut. Therapy didnt help because I was unable to be honest about why I was cutting because I thought if I was my step mom would hurt me. Perhaps her mom or another family member is contibuting to the cutting. And for GODS SAKE the damn program didnt fuckign help! They WORSHIP the parents. So if thats why, she will never fully deal with it. maybe you could help her and be some one to confide in. Suggest therapy. Ask her why she cuts. See whats really going on behind it. Now that I have somewhat dealt with my anger and my insecurity due to my abuse, I no longer drink excessivly or cut or any of that shit. I dont need to punish myself. And that had absolutly nothing to do with the program or it helping me.
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Offline Nihilanthic

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« Reply #5 on: July 02, 2005, 04:40:00 AM »
I've still yet to see why cutting is something that needs to be 'treated', is a problem in the first place, and requires lockdown to prevent...  :roll:

The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing
--Edmund Burke

« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 07:00:00 PM by Guest »
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DannyB on the internet:I CALLED A LAWYER TODAY TO SEE IF I COULD SUE YOUR ASSES FOR DOING THIS BUT THAT WAS NOT POSSIBLE.

CCMGirl on program restraints: "DON\'T TAZ ME BRO!!!!!"

TheWho on program survivors: "From where I sit I see all the anit-program[sic] people doing all the complaining and crying."

Offline Anonymous

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« Reply #6 on: July 10, 2005, 07:48:00 PM »
what needs to be treated is the reason for the cutting.  When I was a teenager I started cutting because my parents would always punish me really, really harshly.  So I thought that if I punished myself first, then they wouldn't fuck me up so bad.   Also, kids who cut that get sent away just find better ways to hide the cutting.
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Offline Anonymous

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« Reply #7 on: July 10, 2005, 09:35:00 PM »
I agree the reason for cutting needs to be treated, but I am not a Doctor and can't nor won't give that kind of advice.  I will also say that one who cuts is at risk of great harm and infection as well, hospitalizations sometimes help for a period but long term treatment of some sort whether outside therapy or something else needs to be in place, I have heard of kids who have died due to cutting not ever being treated.
Andrea
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Offline Anonymous

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« Reply #8 on: July 10, 2005, 09:46:00 PM »
Cutters will use just about anything to continue - so putting them in a teen program isn't going to do the trick. I'd suggest an acute facility for a few weeks of intensive treatment - where parents can visit daily and have phone calls.  This should be tried first.
In California - Vista Del Mar in Ventura is pretty good and also Del Amo in Carson Calif. Both have programs for teens and encourage parental vistation and participation.
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Offline bandit1978

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« Reply #9 on: July 10, 2005, 11:29:00 PM »
This girl doesn't need "behavior modification".  And, as everyone pointed out, wilderness programs really won't address the issue.

What she needs is a good therapist, and lots of support at home.  Also, it will be beneficial to everyone if the parent(s) go to some therapy themselves, if for no other reason than to learn how they can help their daughter to deal with these issues.
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egan Flynn
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Offline Anonymous

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« Reply #10 on: July 11, 2005, 08:17:00 AM »
A big problem with program alum is they think everyone will now benefit from a 'program'. Please don't suggest a program to your friend, she will just get worse. That much is guaranteed.
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