here are some of the responses
thought they were neat
Hi
Yes my daughter has been bulllied alot in grammar school. Even to the point she didn't want to go to school anymore. I've told teachers and principles but nothing is ever really done. I finally told her to speak up and the bully finally left her alone. The bully was a girl bigger than her,(weight wise) I told her alot of people do that to get the other kids off of them and that way all the attention will go to her. Alot of times these kids that bully are often or have been bullied themselves.
this ones from Boooomer
i think i like Booomer,he sounds down to earth
I instructed my son to ask very politely that the "bully stop targeting him for ridicule and harrasment." and when the "bully refused" my son was to hit him as hard as he could right in the nose. which proved very effective, the councellors meeting we had to attended was not pleased with my son"s conduct, but the broken nosed bully did NOT bother him again.
goofy sue
I think we should be far more flexible in how we allow our kids to handle bullies. It's ridiculous that the victim is always expected to be "above" the behavior that he is being harassed by. Walking away doesn't always work. If a situation can't be settled right away with a good swift punch to the nose of the harasser (which usually does work!) because everyone is so afraid of "violence", the frustration simply builds so any later reaction is probably worse than it might have been if the victim had just felt he didn't have to put up with being walked all over in the first place.
Dania22
don't know what is up the gay thing here?
My daughter too was bullied and I reported it to the school. I have even gone to her school at recess /lunch time where I am informed I cannot spend that time with my child who is left all by herself and have asked the V.P. to work with me.. I do not feel schools today really give a damn about children, they are so much into introducing garbage about accepting gays when she is too young to be concerned about sexual behavior, The schools should be working with the kids on their level and what is going on in their young minds. My child is too young to be introduced to gays and I feel this world is truly falling to pieces. My daughter has had her clothes ripped off and I have reported it to the school stating I want the parents to pay for the repairs. however I get no where. It might come to a point we may have to home school our children..
Armystrong99
We have found that reporting the bullying has be very ineffective at our school. My daughter is in a class of 4 girls and 17 boys. It is awful! I finally went to the school myself and confronted two of worst boys. Things seem to have calmed down with one and the other is right back at it. My daughter comes home in tears every night.
school bullying
Teacher was part of the bullying in this small town private catholic school. If the teacher made fun of you then the kids did not want to go against her, and they would disassociate also, it caused major depression in my 4th grader, hiding in the closet etc. Moved to another school and with counseling and many years she is main stream social but will never forget that experience in her life.
Amyeg
A problem with telling your child to use physical force to defend themselves is that many schools have a zero tolerance policy when it comes to fighting and they will be suspended along with the bully. Schools aren't interested in hearing whether or not your defensive action was justified.
peace62
I was bullied as a child, and my son went through many years of the same thing. The same with my oldest daughter who is now 22. It is very hard to try and explain to a child why someone is treating them so badly. In my case and also my son's, we were both very very shy in school. I guess we were easy targets. But in my generation, we were told to handle it ourselves. Matter of fact, I'm not sure that I ever told my family because I knew that they wouldn't do anything about it.
I've had a very open relationship with my children, and they trust me and tell me things that other kids probably wouldn't tell their parents. It's taken a lot of years of talking my kids through these situations, and I got involved when I could. I had my son's classroom changed around in elementary school. I did this through the principal, who understood the situation, and no reason was given to the kids in the class for the change. The kids just accepted it as part of the normal school routine. In my daughter's case, I discovered bruises all over her body when she was around ten. A kid that stood in line with her waiting on the bus was kicking her and knocking her down. She wasn't going to tell me about it, probably figuring I wouldn't do anything. She didn't know the name of the bully, so I told her rather than taking the bus home from school, I would meet her and she'd point out the kid to me. I went up and asked the child his name. Eventually his mother came along, and after a brief visit to the principal's office, all was taken care of.
It's very frustrating, and a very hard situation. It's heartbreaking to be the parent of a child that's being bullied. Sometimes the situation is very touchy, and has to be handled a certain way. I think that my involvement with my children has helped get them through the tough times.
charmedlulu
My son has repeatedly been bullied through his school years. Although I went to the authority figures at the school nothing was ever done. I worked overtime to try and get my son through some very rough trials and tribulations. I tried to teach him that fighting was not the answer. I tried to teach him to walk away, yet as he aged, and found his plea for it to stop fell on deaf ears, he used his fists to solve the problem. Today the school remains a complete bully zone, of very troubled children, and the school declares they are bully free. Hogwash, teachers and administration just don't know how to deal with the problem, and many of the parents defend their children's bullying techniques. Unfortunately, the society we have become is apparent everywhere. We are a society without morals.
SpikemanMH
Last summer while at a BBQ, a 9 yr old boy was bullying my then 5 yr old son. My son came over to me crying that the bully kept picking on him and hitting him. I told him he had two choices. One, he could go tell the bully's dad about his son's behavior, or Two... he could go handle his business and step to the bully and deal with it. He opted for number Two. The bully was a full foot taller and about 20 lbs. heavier. My son punched him in the face and stomach and knocked him to the ground, then proceeded to stand over him in a rage and point his finger down at the bully and told the bully, "You don't hit me ever again, or I will kick your a$$". The bully went off to his room crying and ashamed. Case closed.
I made a very clear point to remind my son to never ever start a fight, but that should he find himself in a situation, to deal with it decisively
Jay-J
My daughters both have been bullied alot. My children are bi-racial and the kids were constantly making fun of their skin color, hair and height. I did report it to the principal, but unfortunately I didnt see any changes. My daughters got to the point where they didnt want to go school and they would cry in the morning using excused like their head hurt or they felt sick, just so they wouldnt go to school. I think alot of parents just need to explain to kids that we dont call people names especially when there are so many races in the world..Parents need to educate their kids, cause alot of times it comes from the parents themselves calling other people racial slurs, so they think its ok. And now my daughters have an insecurity about themselves and its so sad to know that children have to already deal with this kind of nonsense at an early age.
Jrome
My nephew had been picked on by the same boy in his class for a while. When Levi(nephew) told the teacher, or principal they told my brother that Levi needed to learn how to stick up for himself, while the kids all called Levi a taddle tale. It got to the point where Levi was beat with a soda bottle by this same kid on the school bus, and when Levi told the driver, he was told to shut up and sit down. My brother, his wife, and Levi finally went to the principal to complain and the bully confessed to his actions, but Levi is still afraid of this bully and sometimes does not want to go to school.
stillshyat45
04/24/07 01:58 PM In my case, I was the child who got picked on, berated, and harrassed. I remember having no friends and going home crying almost every day. There was also little hope things would change because my town had only one school and you were pretty much "stuck" with these same group of kids from age 5 all the way through High School. I ended up with very low self-esteem (still have it to some degree), social skills that aren't as refined and took a long time to develop and other little personality defects. The hurt will never go away even as a now 45 year old adult. My question is, why did I turn my hurt inward and why do boys turn theirs outward? Is the violent reaction we've seen in these school settings gender specific?
drifter2
boomer is absolutely correct! I told my son almost the exact same thing. The teacher was on the bus to and from snowboarding and didn't intervene. I told him the next time they start punching , kicking you on the bus hit the closest one as hard as you can right in the nose! Yep.. got kicked off that bus but NO ONE has picked on him since! Too bad it has to be this way but I guess maybe that's how bullies have always needed to be taught!
My eldest, when he was in the 6th grade (last school year) was cornered in a restroom by a boy who had been bullying him. The boy, without a word, backed my son against a wall and pummeled him with both fists and kicked him with both feet until another boy came in and ran back out to tell a teacher, who broke up the fight. My son was so shocked at the whole thing, he never got to defend himself - did not throw one single punch. Yet they were BOTH suspended. My stunned and bruised and bleeding son was suspended for getting his ass kicked!!!
Tell me what has become of our society?!?!?
This school year, the school counselors came into his (and every) classroom to discuss bullying. They actually told the class "IF SOMEONE IS HITTING YOU, YOU JUST NEED TO BE STILL UNTIL THEY ARE FINISHED AND THEN GO REPORT THE INCIDENT TO AN ADULT." Yeah, if you can still walk! What if the guy beats you until you are dead?
It is insane nonsense. We told him to ignore that. And that he is to avoid confrontation at all costs, but that if anyone hit him ever again, to do whatever it takes to defend himself. Including, but not limited to, gouging out an eye, kicking their groin with all his might, etc.
motherofalovedone
My son was bullied at an elementary school in a very good neighborhood in Texas (Lamar Independent School District). Some of the bullying actually happened in the classroom when the teacher had stepped out of the class, leaving the children alone. This boy had my 11 year old son on the floor, kicking him in the stomach. We had no success by working with the school at all. We eventually took our kids out of the school and are now happily home schooling. My sons are happy, are involved with other kids in lots of activities, and have improved their studies dramatically. We recently moved and before leaving I learned that my next door neighbor's daughter was bullied by the same boy in the same class. She came home with hand prints on her face and bloodied legs from being kicked. Her mother also got no support from the school. She took her kids out and is sending them to a private school now. It is especially upsetting because we were paying very high property taxes to support our schools and we, as well as many other families in the neighborhood, had to take our kids out of the school we were supporting to keep them safe. Our schools in this nation are unacceptable. This is a crime!
it goes on like this for 129 pages all about the same
i kinda like the parents and people on here they sound kinda reasonable
and are rather reassuring
i have to say they don't seem to really pay a lot of attention to the wording of the question, ie is your bullied child the next shooter, tonight on Fox news and so on, they just launch into their down to earth stories about bullying? it is interesting really, perhaps the media only filters through our lives and beliefs so much that we pay attention too?
they seem pretty caught up in their realities.
as you get through a few more pages though they start to repeat some of the prejudice, depressed kids are more likely to do stuff
try crazy as hell, completely insane?
that guy at Virginia Tech was completely insane,
he never talked, signed his name with a question mark, stalked violently a couple of girls, scared the hell out of his roommate
who described him as practically catatonic, just sitting on his bed staring not moving or responding to questions, and if he did say anything it seems like it was horrifically violent
he was a hard core schizophrenic with probably a specific sort of very bad depression, i had abnormal psych. that guy was really crazy?
not just some ordinary random person :roll:
the kids at columbine had an army trunk under their beds full of guns and grenades, these were not maybe sort of situations
little billy is angry because he was bullied or depressed susie or ann with anorexia, how many millions of school kids are there too?
and how many go postal? it's not that common a problem I'm sorry.
our society is so weird