I want to say something about sexual harassment, groan right? well I thought I'd clarify something about it. I must seem pretty paranoid about it and I don't want it to give any parents reading this the wrong impression. I am paranoid about it because it can be very bad, especially in school environments. I'll give an example. I said a few days ago in college the kids, boys, were saying stuff that was both violent and sexual. I'm sure this got dismissed because I can be so up in arms about sexism, this is an unfortunate side effect of many negative things, post traumatic stress type stuff. You are angry and paranoid because something that bad happened, therefore no one believes you because you seem angry and paranoid. Try telling people about the brainwashing prison camp in the backwoods of Tennessee :roll:
I wanted to clarify for any parents that read this that don't know what sexual harassment is, or anybody, what I’m talking about. I have a good immediate example too. I don't like to repeat it as it sounds horrible but remember I am not the one coming up with this and I find it horrible. Someone has CSI on in the other room right now, and they are saying far worse things, so I will simply report what I heard with no embarrassment.
When your daughter says I am being sexually harassed, this is the kind of stuff she means, not “hey your butt looks good ha ha.”
I was talking to these two boys during break from class, after a test, we were in the smoking area outside. They had seemed like nice kids, they were both probably nineteen? They had been polite enough. At first they were talking about the Virginia Tech shooting, they immediately started talking about what they would have done differently. They talked about carrying weapons to protect oneself, one guy pulled out a knife and the other guy pulled out two knives, to show they were well protected I guess. The conversation turned to guns, and concealed carrying permits and who had one and who didn't. It worried me because I had been feeling safer with this little stun key chain baton that was supposed to incapacitate an attacker, of course though some nutty guy would have a knife and probably a gun darn, I was thinking, duh. Guns and nuts go together like alcohol and nuts, not everyone that has a gun is a nut but nuts probably do have one.
So then the guys, I saw as kids, the nineteen year olds look like kids to me now, started talking about stuff on the internet, they were talking to me too, we were in a conversation, my side was a lot more sane though, nodding and smiling and such. Now again I don't want to repeat this, but this is sexual harassment ok, they were both talking to me to, and I felt cornered honestly.
The one guy starts telling a story about this guy having sex with a girl in Las Vegas, he was actually moving his pelvis and holding his hands like he, I guess, was holding on to a girls butt from the back, the story went on a little while too it seemed. This guy in Vegas was having sex and the doors in the hotel were a kind of glass that when you touched a button they became misted over but when you touched it again you could see through them, so he keeps touching the door while he is having sex so people can see through it and then can’t. The final time he does it a security guard was there and he &^%& all over the glass. I didn’t like this story much or the pelvic thrusts but I just nodded and smiled. The other guy starts talking about seeing this thing on the internet where this guy tried to have *&^*&* sex with a girl and filmed it, there was &**& everywhere and the camera guy threw up and so did the guy, this story was much longer than the above sentence and very graphic. I’m sorry to have to repeat this, even with editing but this is a reasonably ordinary form of sexual harassment. He also mention *&^* sex one other times in relation to his girlfriend, in a conversation, that started by talking about the test we had just taken? This time was unrelated to the above story? I have not talked to these kids much, and I look really ordinary, like everyone else in class, they were not singling me out. I am not picking on men, or boys, I know very nice non before mentioned guys.
I also know that this is what your daughter means when she says the boys say nasty things at school, or I’m being sexually harassed.
I go to a good, not that easy to get into, state college. These boys looked like nice, well dressed kids. I don’t know what the hell they were thinking really but, this is the kind of stuff I heard in my small private high school pretty much on a daily basis too. It really is constant. Often it is directed at a girl, not just jokes told around her, do you want to &*^&, we know you like to *&^*, for no reason. I am always amazed when I hear someone say they must have a reason to sexually harass her and stuff. This is not the case.
This is very common and goes on all the time. Ask your daughter to tell you exactly what was said, do not yell at her, or tell her to avoid them, bullies won’t let you avoid them especially sexual ones. It is hard for girls to report it, because often the abuse gets worse. Actually listen to your daughter and don’t yell at her when you hear something you don't understand or don't want to hear. Actually listen, let her finish, I think it is worse than it used to be when most parents went to school. I think awareness classes and less tolerance needs to be had for sexual harassment in schools. It's like it doesn't even exist, which means it is rampant.
