Author Topic: Hyde School, The Most Truthful Informative Post I have Seen  (Read 48779 times)

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Offline Anonymous

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Hyde School, The Most Truthful Informative Post I have Seen
« Reply #45 on: January 03, 2006, 12:20:00 PM »
Quote
On 2006-01-03 08:19:00, Anonymous wrote:

"I agree that the current climate has made it harder to fill a school like Hyde, because the first tier schools are taking the under-achiver that Hyde does so well with and in turn allows your daughter to be admitted, with a committment from your family to give it a go, when in the past you would have been driving back to your shrink trying to figure out what wilderness program or therapy school to send her to to be fixed, while you sit at home, hoping that some schmuck in Utah can fix the damage you did to your kid while you watch digital cable and sip on bottom shelf Vodka."
Absolutely BRILLIANT post :tup:
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 07:00:00 PM by Guest »

Offline Anonymous

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Hyde School, The Most Truthful Informative Post I have Seen
« Reply #46 on: January 03, 2006, 12:21:00 PM »
Quote
On 2006-01-03 07:02:00, Anonymous wrote:

"Hmmm...

Calling the staff losers...

Maybe you should look at yourself first, after all, your daughter prbably had no shot at getting into a "real" boarding school.  Apple doesn't fall far from the tree....."Loser""
Another great post, I love this anon!! :tup:  :tup:
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Offline Anonymous

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« Reply #47 on: January 03, 2006, 03:58:00 PM »
Hi everyone,

I came across this site because while I was at hyde I had heard of someone making an "anti-hyde" website and they were soon going to get an accounatbility, but I said to myself "as soon as i get out of this place im going to find an anti-hyde website and tell the truth about this place" I wish there were more sites like this and hopefully you guys can keep posting and hope that students and parents cotemplating about visiting hyde will see these sites and not believ everything that the school and faculty have to say about the program. I went to hyde for the 2005 summer challenge, thinking it was some kind of summer camp. boy was i wrong! It was a nightmare to say the least. When I had first been shown a tour of the school (by a student!) The student didn't even mention anything about this 2-4 thing and shadowing, crew etc. I learned for myself over the next 5 wks. I came in being more of an under-achiever I guess than a substance abuser, which most of the students were. All of the staff and students tried to "put me in a box" since I didnt speak much about myself in discovery groups. The whole time I knew what they were trying to do, figure me out and put a label on me, then tell my parents about my problems but  putting it so to not to offend anyone and giving them hope if iwere to attend this school, they could "straighten me out" . I tried to get away with telling as little about myself over the next 5 wks and just talking to the kids there. But doing this only made the staff more angry. They took me out of my bed in the middle of nights to "confess" when I was really only witholding information about myself, not anything that I was doing or would do.I was put on 2-4, 5:30's, and shadows. At this point they were puzzled. Since I didnt talk much in discovery groups, the staff was sure that I was a supsicious student that had something to hide, when really all I was trying to do was protect myself. During the last few weeks, I started to get annoyed and desperate. I wasnt getting any sleep and I was blamed for things that I haden't done. When someone had drugs or something was stolen, I was under suspicion. At this point they were puzzled, and I started to confess to things I hadent done just to get the staff off of my back and get some rest. They told my parents on the phone that I was "minupulative, stubborn, and had an attitude problem". My parents were not allowed to talk to me since I was on phone restriction for most of the time, but they knew that something wrong was going on. When my parents came for the last day and we all met in discovery groups, the staff told them everything that wasnt true about me. How I had smoked in the bathroom, how I had stolen things, how i was minupalitive and lied. But they finished off with telling my parents that there was still hope for me, and that deep down I was a good person etc. and could be saved if I attended Hyde school in the fall. My parents were not buying it, and I was saved. Hyde is not like other boarding schools, and its a sticky situation when you only hear good things about the school from the school itself. The sad thing is that I think the kids there feel that if they were to tell the truth about how difficult and exhausting the school is to the parents on a tour or on a visit, etc, there would always be someone there to rat them out and they would get some kind of accountability. Its very cult-like there if you know what I mean, not one person can go astray or else all eyes are on them. Im thankful that I am not going to that school, and I have the utmost sympathy for the kids who are attending now and are having a tough time. Just keep your chin up, and wait until you can attend college! Keep posting!
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 07:00:00 PM by Guest »

Offline Anonymous

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« Reply #48 on: January 03, 2006, 04:27:00 PM »
Quote
On 2006-01-03 12:58:00, Anonymous wrote:

"Hi everyone,



I came across this site because while I was at hyde I had heard of someone making an "anti-hyde" website and they were soon going to get an accounatbility, but I said to myself "as soon as i get out of this place im going to find an anti-hyde website and tell the truth about this place" I wish there were more sites like this and hopefully you guys can keep posting and hope that students and parents cotemplating about visiting hyde will see these sites and not believ everything that the school and faculty have to say about the program. I went to hyde for the 2005 summer challenge, thinking it was some kind of summer camp. boy was i wrong! It was a nightmare to say the least. When I had first been shown a tour of the school (by a student!) The student didn't even mention anything about this 2-4 thing and shadowing, crew etc. I learned for myself over the next 5 wks. I came in being more of an under-achiever I guess than a substance abuser, which most of the students were. All of the staff and students tried to "put me in a box" since I didnt speak much about myself in discovery groups. The whole time I knew what they were trying to do, figure me out and put a label on me, then tell my parents about my problems but  putting it so to not to offend anyone and giving them hope if iwere to attend this school, they could "straighten me out" . I tried to get away with telling as little about myself over the next 5 wks and just talking to the kids there. But doing this only made the staff more angry. They took me out of my bed in the middle of nights to "confess" when I was really only witholding information about myself, not anything that I was doing or would do.I was put on 2-4, 5:30's, and shadows. At this point they were puzzled. Since I didnt talk much in discovery groups, the staff was sure that I was a supsicious student that had something to hide, when really all I was trying to do was protect myself. During the last few weeks, I started to get annoyed and desperate. I wasnt getting any sleep and I was blamed for things that I haden't done. When someone had drugs or something was stolen, I was under suspicion. At this point they were puzzled, and I started to confess to things I hadent done just to get the staff off of my back and get some rest. They told my parents on the phone that I was "minupulative, stubborn, and had an attitude problem". My parents were not allowed to talk to me since I was on phone restriction for most of the time, but they knew that something wrong was going on. When my parents came for the last day and we all met in discovery groups, the staff told them everything that wasnt true about me. How I had smoked in the bathroom, how I had stolen things, how i was minupalitive and lied. But they finished off with telling my parents that there was still hope for me, and that deep down I was a good person etc. and could be saved if I attended Hyde school in the fall. My parents were not buying it, and I was saved. Hyde is not like other boarding schools, and its a sticky situation when you only hear good things about the school from the school itself. The sad thing is that I think the kids there feel that if they were to tell the truth about how difficult and exhausting the school is to the parents on a tour or on a visit, etc, there would always be someone there to rat them out and they would get some kind of accountability. Its very cult-like there if you know what I mean, not one person can go astray or else all eyes are on them. Im thankful that I am not going to that school, and I have the utmost sympathy for the kids who are attending now and are having a tough time. Just keep your chin up, and wait until you can attend college! Keep posting!"


Your experience during summer challenge is incredibly similar to what I saw during my full year at Hyde.  And what you describe is pretty mild compared to what I saw during the rest of the year.  Summer challenge is a much "lighter" experience than the regular year.  During the regular year I saw what you saw PLUS a boatload of more extreme things.  I saw staff yell at kids, call them names, and embarrass kids in public.  I sat in family seminars and saw parents yelling at their kids, kids yelling at their parents, parents  saying awful things to other parents, staff saying awful things to parents, you name it.  There are a few good people at Hyde, but most of the people I met have real serious problems and they're not getting the right help there.  There are so many Hyde students with serious mental and emotional issues, and I never met anybody on staff who could provide counseling.  Hyde doesn't believe in counseling, which is amazing to me since it admits so many kids who have serious issues.  

Thank you for telling people what it's like at Hyde.  Where did you go after leaving?  I hope it worked out.
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Offline Anonymous

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« Reply #49 on: January 03, 2006, 04:35:00 PM »
Quote
On 2006-01-03 08:19:00, Anonymous wrote:

"I agree that the current climate has made it harder to fill a school like Hyde, because the first tier schools are taking the under-achiver that Hyde does so well with . . ."


I think you're absolutely right about the fact that Hyde is having a harder time enrolling students because more traditional boarding schools are taking the kinds of kids that used to go to Hyde.  I also think Hyde's deteriorating reputation is affecting enrollments.  Based on my time at Hyde it seems that the school is taking many kids it can't serve effectively.  I'm amazed at the number of Hyde students with real significant psychiatric issues and substance abuse issues.  As far as I know, the school doesn't have anybody on staff to provide mental health counseling, and they have the part-time guy come in to do substance abuse groups.  That sounds like a recipe for disaster, with so many kids who need counseling and no real counseling program.  

I really disagree with your statement that Hyde does so well "with the under-achiever."  That's not what I've seen.  Hyde may be ok with the kid who underachieves and doesn't have much more than an "attitude" problem.  But as far as I can tell there are SO MANY kids at Hyde who have so many more problems, and the school does a terrible job with those kids.  I've seen so many kids fall apart at Hyde, and so many of these have serious mental health problems.
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Offline Anonymous

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« Reply #50 on: January 07, 2006, 09:46:00 AM »
I can't believe I came accross this website, I am now in the process of dealing with the situation that my youngest son who has been attending Hyde since November 2005 refuses to go back and I supporthim completely on this, yet his father (we're legally separted) who is an ex-Hyde student is trying his hardest to convince me otherwise.  In the first place his father sent him there because he could not discipline my son properly and since he has residential custody of him I felt really I could not relly help my son and agreed to send him there.  I have seen my son go from a vibrant, energetic, bright young man to a mummy.  I see his fear and agree with all of you who talk about this being a "cult-like" situation.  I went there for their spring retreat and that is exactly how I felt, that I was in the middle of a cult and was actually amazed to read how so many people on this website reffers to Hyde in the same way I do!  Last night my ex took me out for a coctail to do his best to convince me that my son is being a quiter and needs to go back and finish this year.  I see his point of view but I also see and feel the unhappiness in my son.  He has chosen to be with me and stay in my house during the holiday season because he could not even stand being next to his father.  Instead of this helping a relationship between father and son it has made my son angrier.  

When I heard my ex talking to me last night I saw all the "Hyde" lingo and expressions being said to me,and I even told him that all that comes out of his mouth is pure Hyde.  My ex never graduated from Hyde, because at the time he went his sister was also going and his family could not afford to have two kids going to that same school, well Mr. Gauld (father) and other Hyde officials, told him at the time that they would much rather have his sister attend Hyde than him because she showed more leadership potential hthan he did.  This, I believe completely scared my ex and actually when he went to one of the FLC's he got an apology form all of the Gaulds because they "did him wrong" then.  As a matter of fact even though my ex graduated Hig School from another school, he last night told me that he willbe receiving his diploma from Hyde very soon, he just has to give a lecture or a speech in front of the school and he will receive it.

My middle son is also attending Hyde and it has not seem to affect him emotionally at all, but his little brother tells me that he just "goes with the flow and does everything they tell him to do there". . .

I certainly feel that this place may be good for some kids but definitely not for my youngest and as I said I am so glad I found this place where I can see other's oppinions on this school.  I was made to belive by my ex last night that I am crazy by thinking this way about Hyde and it being a cult.

And as far as the school providing records for me to transfer him to another school, it has been extremely difficult to get anything from them.  The Registrar has given me nothing but attitude when I have been calling her every single day after she promises she will fax the records "as soon as she gets approval form the business office" and I have not received a thing.  The other day she could not do ti because it was snowing in Maine and she had to go home. . . .

I look forward to reading more from you all.
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Offline Anonymous

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« Reply #51 on: January 07, 2006, 06:01:00 PM »
Quote
On 2006-01-07 06:46:00, Anonymous wrote:

"I can't believe I came accross this website, I am now in the process of dealing with the situation that my youngest son who has been attending Hyde since November 2005 refuses to go back and I supporthim completely on this, yet his father (we're legally separted) who is an ex-Hyde student is trying his hardest to convince me otherwise.  In the first place his father sent him there because he could not discipline my son properly and since he has residential custody of him I felt really I could not relly help my son and agreed to send him there.  I have seen my son go from a vibrant, energetic, bright young man to a mummy.  I see his fear and agree with all of you who talk about this being a "cult-like" situation.  I went there for their spring retreat and that is exactly how I felt, that I was in the middle of a cult and was actually amazed to read how so many people on this website reffers to Hyde in the same way I do!  Last night my ex took me out for a coctail to do his best to convince me that my son is being a quiter and needs to go back and finish this year.  I see his point of view but I also see and feel the unhappiness in my son.  He has chosen to be with me and stay in my house during the holiday season because he could not even stand being next to his father.  Instead of this helping a relationship between father and son it has made my son angrier.  



When I heard my ex talking to me last night I saw all the "Hyde" lingo and expressions being said to me,and I even told him that all that comes out of his mouth is pure Hyde.  My ex never graduated from Hyde, because at the time he went his sister was also going and his family could not afford to have two kids going to that same school, well Mr. Gauld (father) and other Hyde officials, told him at the time that they would much rather have his sister attend Hyde than him because she showed more leadership potential hthan he did.  This, I believe completely scared my ex and actually when he went to one of the FLC's he got an apology form all of the Gaulds because they "did him wrong" then.  As a matter of fact even though my ex graduated Hig School from another school, he last night told me that he willbe receiving his diploma from Hyde very soon, he just has to give a lecture or a speech in front of the school and he will receive it.



My middle son is also attending Hyde and it has not seem to affect him emotionally at all, but his little brother tells me that he just "goes with the flow and does everything they tell him to do there". . .



I certainly feel that this place may be good for some kids but definitely not for my youngest and as I said I am so glad I found this place where I can see other's oppinions on this school.  I was made to belive by my ex last night that I am crazy by thinking this way about Hyde and it being a cult.



And as far as the school providing records for me to transfer him to another school, it has been extremely difficult to get anything from them.  The Registrar has given me nothing but attitude when I have been calling her every single day after she promises she will fax the records "as soon as she gets approval form the business office" and I have not received a thing.  The other day she could not do ti because it was snowing in Maine and she had to go home. . . .



I look forward to reading more from you all."


I am sorry to hear about your son's painful experience at Hyde.  As you can see, there are lots of people who have the same concerns about the Hyde cult as you do.  I have had those same feelings whenever I've attended a family weekend or FLC.  As you said, some kids do okay at Hyde (although I've met quite a few who talk about how they play the game and just keep their head down), but for many it's a terrible environment that turns out to be very harmful.  I hope you're able to work things out and find a good school for your son.  You should know that many people have left Hyde for similar reasons and have found much more appropriate schools that provide a much healthier environment. Good luck.
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Offline Anonymous

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« Reply #52 on: January 08, 2006, 11:49:00 AM »
I learned an invaluable lesson from my experience with sending my daughter to Hyde, which was, by the way, highly recomended by several mental health professionals. My daughter has a pervasive LD which affects her co-ordination,her sense of time and space, her reading of body language , and the list goes on. She is highly intelligent and on the surface her 'quirks' may appear to be behavioral.I mistakenly thought that she needed to learn how to survive in the real world, learning disabilities or not, and Hyde, I was told ,would be the place to teach her how to 'self advocate'. I couldn't have picked a more inappropriate placement for her, since none of her difficulties were ever considered.She was bombarded with punitive measures for much of what was not her fault or for her inabliltiy to play the social games that her peers and interns played ,with her being the dupe. What was even more alarming was that many of the kids there do have severe emotional /behavioral problems stemming from external sources rather than a primary neurological source, and while Hyde's philosopy may help some of these kids, the kids who have internalized emotional fallout stemming from a physical or nuerological disability , such as a learning disability ,stand to lose far more than their own self -respect and self worth. This type of negative, punitive environment for those with LD'S could be a death sentence. My first impression of Hyde was that it reminded me of Amway with its therapeutic meetings that seemed to camouflage the hidden agenda of the 'LEADER'. I looked at this with some amusement, but when I saw first-hand that some of the kids there were being punished for behavior that was a direct result of their LD, I realized how destructive this type of school was for my daughter. She went into Hyde mildly depressed with no history of drug or alcohol abuse and certainly no suicidal intent. After being there for less than 2 months , she was routinely cutting her wrists.  Her story might have ended in tragedy, had I listened to Hyde and stopped ' making excuses for my daughter and get with the program'.What I did learn was an invaluable lesson for myself and also for those parents who have a child with a primary LD. The best school is one that has a population of kids with LD'S or related disorders so that you know the staff and teachers and all those invloved with your son or daughter have a 'working 'experience and are trained specifically to work with the specific LD's. There also should be no behavioral mod programs set in place specifically to break ' bad behavioral habits or tendencies', since the strategies that best work  for kids with LD'S with emotional and behavior fallout are very different than those which are used with kids with a primary psychiatric / emotional disorder. I doubt very seriously if Laura Gauld would have her child at Hyde if he were diagnosed with say, Aspergers or high functioning autism or any related disorder or learning disablity , unless there was a very supportive, nurturing environment within the school, which is not what comes to mind when I think of Hyde. Be warned if this profile sounds like your child's, steer clear of schools like Hyde. I remember one boy there, who had a LD, whose one characteristic was 'impulsivity'. He had vowed to 'accept his consequence', whenever he had acted inappropriately, without anger or a sense of injustice, as was his tendency in the past. I remember thinking 'how sad', that the school isn't focusing on the cause of his behavior, rather than being bent on changing it with punitive measures. I often wonder how things worked out for this kid at Hyde.....for surely changing ones behavior from the outside can sometimes result in an iron exterior but with nothing more than a hollow and empty core .
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Offline Anonymous

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« Reply #53 on: January 08, 2006, 12:10:00 PM »
Quote
On 2006-01-08 08:49:00, Anonymous wrote:

"I learned an invaluable lesson from my experience with sending my daughter to Hyde, which was, by the way, highly recomended by several mental health professionals. My daughter has a pervasive LD which affects her co-ordination,her sense of time and space, her reading of body language , and the list goes on. She is highly intelligent and on the surface her 'quirks' may appear to be behavioral.I mistakenly thought that she needed to learn how to survive in the real world, learning disabilities or not, and Hyde, I was told ,would be the place to teach her how to 'self advocate'. I couldn't have picked a more inappropriate placement for her, since none of her difficulties were ever considered.She was bombarded with punitive measures for much of what was not her fault or for her inabliltiy to play the social games that her peers and interns played ,with her being the dupe. What was even more alarming was that many of the kids there do have severe emotional /behavioral problems stemming from external sources rather than a primary neurological source, and while Hyde's philosopy may help some of these kids, the kids who have internalized emotional fallout stemming from a physical or nuerological disability , such as a learning disability ,stand to lose far more than their own self -respect and self worth. This type of negative, punitive environment for those with LD'S could be a death sentence. My first impression of Hyde was that it reminded me of Amway with its therapeutic meetings that seemed to camouflage the hidden agenda of the 'LEADER'. I looked at this with some amusement, but when I saw first-hand that some of the kids there were being punished for behavior that was a direct result of their LD, I realized how destructive this type of school was for my daughter. She went into Hyde mildly depressed with no history of drug or alcohol abuse and certainly no suicidal intent. After being there for less than 2 months , she was routinely cutting her wrists.  Her story might have ended in tragedy, had I listened to Hyde and stopped ' making excuses for my daughter and get with the program'.What I did learn was an invaluable lesson for myself and also for those parents who have a child with a primary LD. The best school is one that has a population of kids with LD'S or related disorders so that you know the staff and teachers and all those invloved with your son or daughter have a 'working 'experience and are trained specifically to work with the specific LD's. There also should be no behavioral mod programs set in place specifically to break ' bad behavioral habits or tendencies', since the strategies that best work  for kids with LD'S with emotional and behavior fallout are very different than those which are used with kids with a primary psychiatric / emotional disorder. I doubt very seriously if Laura Gauld would have her child at Hyde if he were diagnosed with say, Aspergers or high functioning autism or any related disorder or learning disablity , unless there was a very supportive, nurturing environment within the school, which is not what comes to mind when I think of Hyde. Be warned if this profile sounds like your child's, steer clear of schools like Hyde. I remember one boy there, who had a LD, whose one characteristic was 'impulsivity'. He had vowed to 'accept his consequence', whenever he had acted inappropriately, without anger or a sense of injustice, as was his tendency in the past. I remember thinking 'how sad', that the school isn't focusing on the cause of his behavior, rather than being bent on changing it with punitive measures. I often wonder how things worked out for this kid at Hyde.....for surely changing ones behavior from the outside can sometimes result in an iron exterior but with nothing more than a hollow and empty core ."


Although I am terribly saddened by your story, I am so happy that you took the time to tell the public about your painful Hyde experience. What you have shared is moving, poignant, and, compelling.  Your story about Hyde and its destructive methods sound so very familiar.  Our family has heard many similar testimonials.  In your case the child involved had significant learning disabilities.  In many other cases the students have significant issues with anxiety, eating, and mood disorders.  What so many of these Hyde stories have in common is that this school is absolutely the wrong place to help kids who struggle with these issues.  Hyde's steady diet of shaming, humiliating, confrontational tactics (with occasional supportive conversations thrown in there) is the worst possible "medicine" for these kids.  Fortunately, some of us have seen the light and are getting our kids out of Hyde.  It's take some of us some time to figure out that there are far more appropriate schools and that Hyde is a disaster for many kids.

Your comment about Hyde's Amway qualities is right on target.  There's no question that many of Hyde's strongest fans have bought into this "group think" pyramid-type structure.  It's a very seductive, scary environment for many of us who smell cult when we arrive on Hyde's campus.  

I don't know whether you've had the time to read on this website other parents' testimonials about Hyde and the damage the school did to their children (and some parents), but your sentiments are shared by many others.  We have found that some educational consultants and professionals refer families to Hyde based on very superficial Hyde marketing information.  It's important to get the word out to these folks that underneath Hyde's exterior is an awful lot of destructive pathology.  Stories like yours contribute a great deal.  Thanks, and good luck with your efforts to move beyond Hyde and find a more appropriate setting.
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Offline Anonymous

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« Reply #54 on: January 08, 2006, 01:32:00 PM »
I wrote the post about the situation I am going through with my son not wanting to go back to Hyde.  Today is Sunday, and I still have no school records, his father has completely boycoted my son's decision and since he has residential custody of him I am affraid that he will come and pull him out of my house by force and take him back to Hyde.  My son spoke to him last night and tried to "negotiate" telling his father that he will go back and finish this term only on the condition that his father would give me residential custody (which he is willing to) and child support (which he is not willing) and a car. . . well my ex called me later on last night (about 11:00 pm) telling me that he would agree to all that and suggested that our son and that he should be on the bus at 7:00 am for Hyde, well of course that did not happen, I am just so depressed right now because I do want my son to be happy unfortunately I do not have the resourses to put him in another private school and I know his father will not do so either especially due to the fact that he has solely funded their Hyde education and he is now facing a no refund policy.  

The only place I have to offer to him right now is my local public school, which is in a suburb in NY and does not have the best reputation.  My son assures me that he has the will to make this work until I can move to the next town close to me which has a much better public school system which is where he started out in the first place and he wants to finish High School there.  He has not been diagnosed with any learning problems, dissabilities, as a matter of fact he is quite a bright young man, the only problem was the fact that due to a nasty separation between his father and I his father was given residential custody and he was unable in the 8 years he's had my two youngest sons to discipline them therefore he chose his "alma matter" Hyde to do so.

I am very conflicted because of my option versus his.  My son as I see it and feel deep in my gut needs love, needs his mother and he has told me so.  His father insists that I am giving him the "easy way out" he will not have to work, on the other hand my son tells me that what he is choosing is not the easy way, he is choosing to stay with me, who has to struggle to make ends meet and he is willing to work hard both in school and getting a job.

Even with his father agreeing to even buy a car for him, he is now telling me that his hate for that school is so strong that he doesn't really think he can go back, although his father has agreed to his demands. . .

Just pray for me, I certainly have been doing so.  I have never felt so strongly about something and am willing to support my son in every way.  I have his father's entire family calling me and my son pleeding for me to let him go back, I am not holding him hostage, he just is plain refusing and is threatening to either quit school altogether or run away if he is forced to go back.  As far as legality I don't know if his father can do that, I know that at 16 in NY kids can legally quit without parents intervention and this is what I am affraid will happen besides the fact that if he does go back what are going to be his punishments at Hyde and the emotional scars that this may inflict him. . .
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Offline Anonymous

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Hyde School, The Most Truthful Informative Post I have Seen
« Reply #55 on: January 08, 2006, 04:37:00 PM »
Quote
On 2006-01-08 10:32:00, Anonymous wrote:

"I wrote the post about the situation I am going through with my son not wanting to go back to Hyde.  Today is Sunday, and I still have no school records, his father has completely boycoted my son's decision and since he has residential custody of him I am affraid that he will come and pull him out of my house by force and take him back to Hyde.  My son spoke to him last night and tried to "negotiate" telling his father that he will go back and finish this term only on the condition that his father would give me residential custody (which he is willing to) and child support (which he is not willing) and a car. . . well my ex called me later on last night (about 11:00 pm) telling me that he would agree to all that and suggested that our son and that he should be on the bus at 7:00 am for Hyde, well of course that did not happen, I am just so depressed right now because I do want my son to be happy unfortunately I do not have the resourses to put him in another private school and I know his father will not do so either especially due to the fact that he has solely funded their Hyde education and he is now facing a no refund policy.  



The only place I have to offer to him right now is my local public school, which is in a suburb in NY and does not have the best reputation.  My son assures me that he has the will to make this work until I can move to the next town close to me which has a much better public school system which is where he started out in the first place and he wants to finish High School there.  He has not been diagnosed with any learning problems, dissabilities, as a matter of fact he is quite a bright young man, the only problem was the fact that due to a nasty separation between his father and I his father was given residential custody and he was unable in the 8 years he's had my two youngest sons to discipline them therefore he chose his "alma matter" Hyde to do so.



I am very conflicted because of my option versus his.  My son as I see it and feel deep in my gut needs love, needs his mother and he has told me so.  His father insists that I am giving him the "easy way out" he will not have to work, on the other hand my son tells me that what he is choosing is not the easy way, he is choosing to stay with me, who has to struggle to make ends meet and he is willing to work hard both in school and getting a job.



Even with his father agreeing to even buy a car for him, he is now telling me that his hate for that school is so strong that he doesn't really think he can go back, although his father has agreed to his demands. . .



Just pray for me, I certainly have been doing so.  I have never felt so strongly about something and am willing to support my son in every way.  I have his father's entire family calling me and my son pleeding for me to let him go back, I am not holding him hostage, he just is plain refusing and is threatening to either quit school altogether or run away if he is forced to go back.  As far as legality I don't know if his father can do that, I know that at 16 in NY kids can legally quit without parents intervention and this is what I am affraid will happen besides the fact that if he does go back what are going to be his punishments at Hyde and the emotional scars that this may inflict him. . .

"


This sounds like a pretty awful situation.  I hope you are able to work out the issues with your ex husband in a way that's best for your son.  I have no idea why your son doesn't want to return to Hyde.  What are his reasons?

I know that Hyde is likely to say he's a quitter, and I also know that many kids who don't want to return to Hyde decide that NOT because they want to quit but because they're smart and have figured out that Hyde is a very bad setting for many kids, especially those with mental health struggles.  Perhaps your son is one of the perceptive Hyde students who sees right through the Hyde propaganda and knows that he'd be better off elsewhere.  I realize some kids may want to get out of Hyde for the "wrong" reasons (just to find an easier path), but I know for a fact that a number of Hyde kids are very thoughtful and just don't buy the Gauld rhetoric and brainwashing.  

Good luck.  This is a tough situation.
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 07:00:00 PM by Guest »

Offline Anonymous

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Hyde School, The Most Truthful Informative Post I have Seen
« Reply #56 on: January 08, 2006, 06:33:00 PM »
Thank you for your well wishes.  He has seen past all the bull and brainwhashint, as I said he has no mental problems, only anger issues with his father and although they have been addressed ad Hyde, he just tells me that he tells them what they want to hear.  He does not believe in their kind of "therapy" and their methods of treating the students.  He is emotionally depresesd from tat place, he lost all hs spunk being there ad it is my mission to help him find it as well as restoring his relationship with his father.  I think I can do it better having him with me and going to weekly therapy sessions if necessary rather athan an FLC and/or Family Weekend here and there.  I participated in one of the family weekends and it brought more anger to all of us than anything.

My son is smart and has always been very persuasive and I feel they have crushed his spirit in this place.  

His father is already as I said before using all the "Hyde lingo" and calling him a quiter, etc etc and he also mentioned he is taking the easy way out, but in my view is it really the easy way out what he is taking?  He knows that he has a lot of hard work ahead of him now especially to prove all those who don't believe he can make it outside of Hyde wrong, including his father.  He has me and I am not an absent mother and intend to become involved in every way I can.  I am local, work close to home and to his new school.

I am 100% confident that he can make it without Hyde.  They are not the answer to everybody.

Thanks again.
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 07:00:00 PM by Guest »

Offline Anonymous

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Hyde School, The Most Truthful Informative Post I have Seen
« Reply #57 on: January 21, 2006, 05:39:00 AM »
i went to hyde school where the motto amongst the student is (fake it till you make it) the school is overly cultish and i have to say that i dont know some one who graduated from there who did not regret it. i would like to start a official website showing the obvious flaws of the school and it philosopy if you would like to get involved please email me at ****@****.com

I hope some of you wil get involved and help fight hyde, i would love to get enough ppl together to get some real publicity possibly evin news coverage. its about time to shut this shame of an intitution down, and close its doors forever the last thing we need in this world is another cult
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 07:00:00 PM by Guest »

Offline Anonymous

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Hyde School, The Most Truthful Informative Post I have Seen
« Reply #58 on: January 21, 2006, 05:41:00 AM »
i went to hyde school where the motto amongst the student is (fake it till you make it) the school is overly cultish and i have to say that i dont know some one who graduated from there who did not regret it. i would like to start a official website showing the obvious flaws of the school and it philosopy if you would like to get involved please email me at ****@*****.com

I hope some of you wil get involved and help fight hyde, i would love to get enough ppl together to get some real publicity possibly evin news coverage. its about time to shut this shame of an intitution down
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 07:00:00 PM by Guest »

Offline Anonymous

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Hyde School, The Most Truthful Informative Post I have Seen
« Reply #59 on: January 21, 2006, 09:05:00 AM »
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On 2006-01-21 02:41:00, Anonymous wrote:

"i went to hyde school where the motto amongst the student is (fake it till you make it) the school is overly cultish and i have to say that i dont know some one who graduated from there who did not regret it. i would like to start a official website showing the obvious flaws of the school and it philosopy if you would like to get involved please email me at ****@*****.com



I hope some of you wil get involved and help fight hyde, i would love to get enough ppl together to get some real publicity possibly evin news coverage. its about time to shut this shame of an intitution down"


"If you build it, they will come."  Remember that phrase in a very famous sports movie?  Start the website and let us know the address of it. I know a lot of people myself who would join in.  This is a good idea in order to warn potential parents and students of the harmful ways at Hyde and also for those harmed by Hyde to be able to get things off their chests.  I look forward to an update from you!  You have the support of many people out there, some who are afraid to come forward on this site, but who monitor it on a regular basis.
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 07:00:00 PM by Guest »