Obesity is only one of the behavioral problems we treat at Straight, Inc.-by-the-Sea! It's brought on by avoiding oneself with food---and will lead to nothing but a lifetime of depravity, culminating, of course, in jail, institutionalization, and DEATH! Parents, don't indulge those little fat fucks----and don't despair, either. We can get them in shape with a PBJ diet and plenty of excersize raps. Ask anyone, the kids at the original Straight, Inc. were among the fittest in the nation. Sure, a couple of ingrate malcontents will bitch and moan about certain gastronomical consequences which the druggies brought upon themselves, but research by qualified professionals has shown that the soup at Straight constituted a well-balanced diet in and of itself. Those PBJs were just little treats, you see.
See ya on front row, lardass!
Love ya! Have a seat!