What about "Carlbrook School"?

[Anonymous]

Thank you to everyone who thanked me...at the beginning of last summer, my ex showed me this site (he's went to Carlbrook too). I initially posted a reply to some outside person who had a question about Carlbrook. I didn't expect to come back to this site. Now, I check it at least a few times a week. It sounds stupid to have a website be important to you but whatever. I'm trying to sort out what happened there and this site (and the people on it) have been instrumental in doing that. So thank you to everyone. Please keep writing on this site. It helps more than you know.

To use a patient's issues against him, as a form of power over him—a therapist could lose his license for something like that. It's a betrayal and abuse. And to do it in front of a group, that's public humiliation.

I feel like phrases like that get thrown around a lot here -- "lose their licenses," "abuse," etc. I'm not denying the emotional manipulations or how it fucked us up but I'm interested to know what exactly went on in LEGAL terms. Could a therapist actually lose his or her license over what went down at Carlbrook? Could anyone ACTUALLY be prosecuted for child abuse? It's one thing to go, "we had to sit in Suspension for weeks, it sucked" or "how messed up was Animus?" but was any of it illegal? Yes, they violated our trust. Yes, it was manipulative. But was any of it actually illegal?

I feel like Carlbrook must be very careful about not breaking any laws. My mom told me this a few months ago: When I first started at Carlbrook (I couldn't have been more than a post-Integ @ this point), she had a bunch of Carlbrook parents from the area over for dinner and Tim Brace and a member of the transition staff came too. Tim kept selling Carlbrook and my mom went, "Well, I mean, it's basically just a cult, right?" (she didn't mean it in an attacking way, just an honest, half-joking way) and Tim pushes his seat back from the table and gets flustered and defensive and keeps saying no no no it's not at all and then in the end he admits that Carlbrook used many cult-like practices but they have to be very careful about saying the word "cult" because of some formal state statutes because they'd get in trouble.

I love Tim Brace. I think he's a loving father figure who genuinely means well. Do I think he's perfect? Of course not. I think he's had a really tough life; I think he's been dealt some really unfair cards. However, I think he's risen above any "sob story" he could have used as an excuse and worked extremely hard to help people in pain. I love the man with my whole heart but I'm not naive enough to not see his flaws: I think he's needy. I don't understand the pathological need he has for everyone to love him. I resent him for only stepping in to play the "good guy" part (he got to be all nice and understanding but that was only because he didn't have the responsibilities that the advisers did to punish/regulate/whatever us -- it made me mad how he'd agree with me that XYZ wasn't fair but then wouldn't do anything to stop/prevent XYZ).

But, at the end of the day, I think he believed in what he was doing. I love him for that. Do I agree with everything he did? No, I don't support the system that he supports. But I can't fault him for it. He sincerely loves every kid that walks in the doors of the Commons. He honestly thinks that what he is doing is right. Some of it is in my eyes, some of it isn't. But I would rather have someone like Tim than someone like Denise Prendergast or Nathan Webber who seemed sadistic and stupid and inappropriate and petty and mean who I think manipulated the system and used their power to fuck with kids and play favorites. Also, Tim is receptive.

When I went back for Veneratio, I was able to sit down with him and say, "Tim, X was really messed up. Y really hurt me. You should change Z. You're hurting kids by doing XYZ." I expected him to tell me to get out because I would poison the kids' workshop or something but instead, he just held me and hugged me and apologized. He said, "I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry. None of this was ever meant to hurt you. All we wanted to do was love you and help you." For most of the Veneratio breaks, Tim and I sat in a corner with another girl talking about the parts of Carlbrook that we wanted to change and that had hurt us. He explained to us the reasoning behind the parts that had fucked with us. He listened when we told him how things should be done. I seriously believe that he heard us. Some things have changed at Carlbrook. Not a lot, but some.

Speaking of which...I had my last Transition Call the other day. I was ranting to my transition adviser about the confusion I feel towards Carlbrook -- how I love it so much but hate it at the same time, do I have Stockholm Syndrome, do I have PTSD, did Carlbrook hurt more than it helped, this part of it was so unforgivably hurtful, I still have bad dreams about that part, you should tell the kids this at the beginning, you need to individualize the process more, etc. She told me that she wanted me to write down a list of all the problems that I have about Carlbrook, all the feedback I have for the staff, all the ways I want it to change, and they'd go over it in a Board Meeting. So do you guys have anything you want to add to the list? Please let me know.

For the record, the Board is Tim Brace, Grant Price, Justin Merritt, Andy Coe, Kelly Dunbar, John Henson, Dr. Bender, Jonathan Gurney, and Gillan. I trust Jonathan Gurney and Dr. Bender completely. Tim and Andy I love so much but I can also see their flaws -- Tim is more accepting of criticism than Andy is but I think they're both good people who would listen to our complaints. Kelly, John, Justin, and Grant are too far removed from the therapy process to take any of our feedback personally. My feelings for Gillan are complicated...I hate his assistant dean, Greta. I think his approach to therapy is completely WRONG (totally clinical, very detached, all about pills and diagnoses rather than feelings). But he saved my best friend's life and he seems like he would see feedback/criticism as interesting rather than an attack. Sooo...I think the Board would be the best group of people to go to in this situation. Also, we can present direct criticism towards specific advisers since they won't be in this meeting.

(I just realized how completely obvious it is who I am now that I said all of this. Oh well. I don't really care.)

Sorry for the really long post, guys...in summary: Are any of the things they do to us @ Carlbrook actually ILLEGAL? What can therapists actually lose their licenses for (other than sex with patients/ignoring suicidal threats)? Give me any criticism/feedback you have for Carlbrook staff so I can give it to the Board.

[blombrowski]

Lk,

Thanks for sharing your story and your perspectives on your experiences.

Without knowing the full details about everything that happened at Carlbrook, but understanding the basis for some of the workshops, here is the complicated answer:

In the state of Virginia, because of the way that Carlbrook sells itself as a "boarding school for underachieving students" and not a "therapeutic boarding school" such as Little Keswick, they are not licensed in the state of Virginia.  

Arguably, you could go to the Commonwealth of Virginia Interdepartmental Regulation of Children's Residential Facilities and claim that Carlbrook is in violation of State law by providing therapeutic services without being licensed.
http://www.dss.virginia.gov/sample/faci ... facts.html

What the psychologists themselves do may not be violative of any laws, but they certainly may be violative of professional ethics and could be the basis for revocation of their professional license.  I'm not a lawyer and do not know the laws that pertain in this situation.

What is indisputable that in the State of Oregon, Mount Bachelor Academy, a program that used many of the same kind of "therapeutic techniques" as Carlbrook, those therapeutic techniques were found to be in violation of Oregon licensing standards.  I suspect that they would be at Carlbrook too if they were appropriately licensed.

The short answer is:

That Carlbrook uses these "therapeutic techniques" on the youth that they work with, and they have failed to obtain a license, they should be in violation of Virginia law.  Whether you go to that website, and press a complaint and the authorities enforce that law is another story.  

As for Tim Brace, he sounds a lot like that Bill Hoffman character.  Check out some of Hoffman's facebook posts when things got hot and heavy, and he couldn't play the nice guy anymore.

[Anonymous]

Blombrowski, thanks for your insight.

Some background on Tim Brace. He was the headmaster/director of Mt Bachelor Academy before Sharon Bitz. He was kind of a company shill, Aspen brought him in when they had their big falling out with Linda Houghton, the school's founder. (This falling out was, I've been told, in part over giving Educational Consultants referral fees: Linda supposedly didn't believe in it--even though, as I understand it, she wasn't opposed to rewarding educational consultants in other ways, or allowing them to both invest in the school and give refer partents to it.) Brace was, I believe, at RMA immediately before MBA.

[Anonymous]

I'm still trying to figure out who you are lk. I'm not sure if I knew you or not, but its seems you attended Carlbrook within the last 2 years. I have reached the point where talking even more about my complaints is going to be detrimental to me. It is kind of like when you break your leg, yet you continue to touch it. The first couple touches are needed in order to determine the severity, but after awhile, it becomes painful. Therefore, I encourage you to look back at my posts. Unlike you, I'm not that great at condensing my experience which can explain for my long posts. Even if it becomes painfully boring to read, I urge you to continue reading. My situation was very unique. I have recently reached the point with the people responsible for sending me there (not my parents) that it was a mistake. However, I blame Carlbrook more than them because if they had any form of professionalism, then they would have realized it wasn't right for me and let me leave. Instead, people like Kimberly, Dr. Bender, Denise, and many others tried very hard to convince me that I NEEDED carlbrook to survive. Even though I wanted to leave, their manipulation worked on me for awhile. When my 18th birthday came around, I had already formulated my escape plan. Stupidly, I cancelled all arrangements because I thought my life would be horrible if I left. However, my will power remained strong enough that I retained my moral code (which is much better than any of those standards they came up with!) and left anyway.

I now realize that if I did stay there, I would be extremely worse off. My academic dreams, life experience, and healthy uninterruped natural mental maturing would alll be thrown away. In my month at Carlbrook, I told people I was bored. I said that I knew what I needed to do thanks to some knowledge which i acquired during my time away (learned more about myself, by myself), and the only thing left to do is test try it. That was immediatley laughed at saying that if a post-teneo person isn't ready, how could a pre-integ? That's all I was to them. Everyone was the same. Everyone was forced to aim towards the same goal. If you cried out for your individualism, you were punished. If there was anything I learned during my year away against my will, it was that respect needs to be given to the "self." It is our identities which keep us strong, make us different, and drive our passions...

[Anonymous]

You'd only know me if you were still there in August 2007.

[Anonymous]

yo fucker that calls himself paperclip donnt bash on the shit that actually fuckin helped u, u went there cause u couldnt handle ur dads death, it really fuckin sux that u would spit spit in the face of ur big brither the day u left, thinking you were so fucking smart, yea u got a 4.o so wat, u know my animus flower is stuffed with ur 4.0 bitch, the only reason u fuckin bash on carlbrook is because u were too much of a fuckin pussy and thought that you couldnt do it and that scared the fuckin shit out ouf you, so fuckin get honest and tell shit the way it actually is and for anyone else bashing on carlbrook, if you didnt get wat u needed out of it i guess that fuckin sux for you, but i did and i know alot of people who did and i am in no way a fuckin carlbrook poster child but get ur shit shit fuckers and if your gonna talk sit about people say it to their fuckin face. so carlbrook haters and liers, FUCK YALL!!!

I am Honest and Responsible- Anonymous
Sigma, Dec '09

[cooltherapy]

I got an idea for a christmas card to Tim Brace...
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Dear potential child molester,
Thanks for ruining almost two years of my life. Go listen to some loud music and cry your tears away with teenagers who think you're a pedophile. No matter how many b.s. speeches you give or how many ties you put on, you'll always be a pathetic drug addict in my mind. Enjoy brainwashing people, causing extreme mental trauma to undeserving teenagers, and making a shit load of money off of people's ignorance. Have fun dressing up in suits with the other pathetic losers you call founders and living in a completely idiotic illusion. Do us all a favor. just because you're a failure in life doesn't mean that you need to bring down other people as well. The only kindness you receive is not even sympathy, its pity.

Merry fucking christmas,
Someone you used to say you love

P.S. Maybe this Christmas, you'll give the greatest gift of all and admit that you're full of shit.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Anyone think he'll read this during a morninig meeting?

Guest - you are THE SHIT. I have to say, I agree with you so much. Don't know who you are or if I was with you at Cbk - but goddamn, couldn't have said it better myself.

[cooltherapy]

lk, Doom got creepy w/ me too! And w/ a few other girls in my graduating class. You think he's all nice until he starts hitting on you and making you uncomfortable! Like he'd tell me he couldn't live w/o me and that he loved me more than anyone in the world! Wtf! that's not okay in my book!!! My adviser put me on P-Bans w/ him but he would still try to break them! I'd be like uhhhh Doom I'm on bans. Soooo awkward...I felt sooooo unsafe w/ him.

That's just ridiculous. He's a wonderful guy and a good friend. He cares, unlike the majority of the staff at the school.

[cooltherapy]

lk, Doom got creepy w/ me too! And w/ a few other girls in my graduating class. You think he's all nice until he starts hitting on you and making you uncomfortable! Like he'd tell me he couldn't live w/o me and that he loved me more than anyone in the world! Wtf! that's not okay in my book!!! My adviser put me on P-Bans w/ him but he would still try to break them! I'd be like uhhhh Doom I'm on bans. Soooo awkward...I felt sooooo unsafe w/ him.

[Anonymous]

the only reason u fuckin bash on carlbrook is because u... thought that you couldnt do it and that scared the fuckin shit out ouf you,

I don't know either of you but I think it's messed up if what's going on in a progrgam is "scaring the fucking shit" out of kids--Mr. Paperclip or wats right or anyone. There's a big difference between testing your limits/pushing yourself and having someone pressure/coerce you. Especially when you're a kid or adolescent and the person pressuring is an adult or a caretaker or role model, I'm under the impression that kind of stress can be really unhealthy and-- depending on the kid, his or her past and all that--sometimes damaging.

And wats right, you can name call and make personal attacks all you want, it's not going to make anyone think more of your opinion or your school. I can imagine there's more to you than that one post and that you probably care about the people at Carlbrook a lot. But reading your post as an outsider what it tells me is that Carlbrook just graduated a barely literate bully.

[cooltherapy]

But reading your post as an outsider what it tells me is that Carlbrook just graduated a barely literate bully.

We're not all so dim-witted John Henry. It is amazing to me, though, the amount of kids who "qualify" for the school IQ wise (yes, they test our IQ's before admitting us) who don't know how to spell or form sentences. It's embarrassing, really.

"wats right" - your "animus flower" isn't going to get you into college - and neither is your grammar. As I just said, you are an embarrassment. Continue following your shepherd with the rest of your sheep-family. The black sheep are forming our own community. And unless you're willing to listen, you're not welcome as far as I'm concerned.

You're going to wake up one day. I understand that you just graduated and haven't looked objectively at what you just experienced yet, but insulting a group of people who could potentially wind up supporting you is just a silly idea.

Good luck "holding people in standard" out here in the "real world." People aren't going to take you very seriously.

[Anonymous]

lk, Doom got creepy w/ me too! And w/ a few other girls in my graduating class. You think he's all nice until he starts hitting on you and making you uncomfortable! Like he'd tell me he couldn't live w/o me and that he loved me more than anyone in the world! Wtf! that's not okay in my book!!! My adviser put me on P-Bans w/ him but he would still try to break them! I'd be like uhhhh Doom I'm on bans. Soooo awkward...I felt sooooo unsafe w/ him.

and nice use of the carlbrook lingo "cbk student"

unsafe? really? can we not detach ourselves from this bullshit? if you're going to sit around and bitch about the bs carlbrook put us through, why don't you woman up and start using "grown-up" words?

She’s relating her experience in her own way. Who are you to tell her how to do that? Loaded Language

[cooltherapy]

She’s relating her experience in her own way. Who are you to tell her how to do that? Loaded Language

She's bashing a very good friend of mine and supporting Carlbrook lingo in the process. What's wrong with pointing out why I think it's distasteful, not to mention it being in support of the school that she is so eager to tear to pieces?

[RMA Survivor]

Tim Brace was originally at CEDU, a school founded and based on the Synanon, EST and LIfeSpring Cults.  He then went to the other CEDU school called RMA in Bonners Ferry, Idaho.  I was at RMA during his time there as the director.  The stuff he admitted to doing in his past was criminal and horrible and I didn't get the impression he had changed.

Mount Bachelor Academy was started by CEDU/RMA staff.  Tim was just one of them.  MBA used the same cult system CEDU/RMA were based off of.  Isolating kids, barring open and non-supervised communication with the outside world, banning people from speaking to others, forced labor, humiliating group therapy sessions full of screaming abusive insults at each other and peculiar workshops utilizing sleep deprivation, hot/cold temperature control, blaring loud and repetitive music while coercing kids to divulge information about themselves.  

MBA, like CEDU/RMA before, were eventually shut down.  Investigations determined that the program and it's systematic abuse of teens, the humiliations inflicted upon them, that unlicensed and untrained staff were performing unlicensed therapy based on principles proven to be damaging to people were illegal and/or unethical and they revoked their license.  Tim Brace was a part of creating these programs.  A part of the abuse.  No amount of hugging or other uninvited physical contact such as smooshing can reduce the criminal behavior of Tim Brace and the other people involved in such practices.

You asked if there was proof any of it was illegal?  Odds are strong that if Tim Brace is involved with Carlbrook, many of the same practices that were found to be illegal at Mount Bachelor Academy, that got CEDU/RMA shut down from lawsuits and criminal investigations are probably evident at Carlbrook as well.  Thus it is likely Carlbrook could be shut down if investigated.

Many of the posters on this site are not recent graduated.  Some are.  But like myself, we graduated programs twenty or more years ago.  It can take years to recognize that you have been abused.  Cults have a way of making you believe that what you took part in was good for you and everyone else.  There is a time when you "wake up" and that often doesn't happen to those are who still 18-22.  It requires a certain self-reflection that is different than the type the program teaches.  A level of personal honesty to be able to question what you went through and see it objectively.  When I was 18, I didn't think twice about the raps and propheets, the strange exercises we had to endure.  I did it, I graduated, I left.  But at the age of 41, I can look back at what went on, what we did and I have the education and knowledge to make a neutral decision about it all.  I am old enough to be able to recognize what it abuse, what is right, what is wrong, what is helpful, what is not.   Society calls this wisdom.  And on hindsight, I can say unequivocally that CEDU/RMA were abusive and cruel programs with little merit, and that what I know of Mount Bachelor tells me it was the same.  And that because Tim Brace worked at these programs, and now works at Carlbrook, and that because Carlbrook uses many of the same practices, that Carlbrook is also abusive and cruel.  No different than the other programs Tim Brace was associated with.

[Joel]

Edited: Wednesday, October 06, 2010