Treatment Abuse, Behavior Modification, Thought Reform > The Seed Discussion Forum

Group Think

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Johnny G:
I always thought the only people having fun were on Arts team, the rest of us were just there to get beat.

Tried playing hard once or twice and found out that the loser team was just supposed to go thru the motions.  Then I got banished to the house to work on something, or just watch TV, hang out, whatever - it was alone time, somewhat free to at least think my own thoughts and relax.  I am also athletically challenged especially when it involves round or spheroid objects that you should throw, hit or catch.  WHat exposure I had to the games there definitely sucked, so it WAS a privledge to have something else to do.

jgar:
:lol:  :lol:  :lol:  :lol:  :lol:  :lol:  :lol:

LOL Johnny.
I think you left the Seed just before I came in. I went in around October of 83

Anonymous:
greg, its only sad if its wasted. and you can do soemthing like this, not neccessarily even what you want and not feel it was wasted. or lets say, fully wasted. if there was something useful during that time, then it was worth some price. i've thought about that for myself personally, choosing to stay when i knew there were things i did not like, but it met certain goals at the time. maybe another choice might have been better, but then we dont get to live the alternate reality so i wouldnt know if something else would have turned out better or worse. but i dont think my time was wasted, or better stated, all of my time was wasted. some things i just ignored, like i was spinning my wheels and i knew it but was just waiting for something else. taking what good there was as more important at the time then what i was giving up. every decision in life can offer some gain, and some loss. its a matter of what your goal is in this way. my goal was met in some regards, so i never felt that was wasted. this was just a choice. one direction of many i could have gone. i knew i chose to stay. i knew i sacraficed some things by doing so. it was annoying living with people who had more difficulty with roomates then i did, even though they might have been older, silly to listen to them lecture. but i knew what i was doing. i think the people that had the hardest time at the end, were the ones that stayed but never knew why. maybe it was peer pressure, maybe they just didnt know what they wanted in life, or fear kept them there. i think they have the hardest time because they feel like they never made a choice? one reason why i think you have to take control of your life, making your own decisions, or asking advice if I want you to but knowing you are soliciting someone's opinion and giving up your own free will if you chose to listen. its still all your choice. they dont suffere the consequences if the person's advice is bad, you do. some people just didnt seem to get that. i watch some of them now still looking for someone else to tell them what to do. makes me want to scream. after all that, and yet they still dont want to make their own choices? mind you...they complain about how they couldnt make choices...but they repeat the behavior. now thats frustrating.
i've said it before, but i think the biggest tradegy at the seed was it preached one thing, but did another (i.e.think for yourself, but surpressed free thinking) and people didnt either have enough sense to see the duality, or for various reasons surpressed their thoughts when they saw it, a bit like jgar is talkingh about questioning his thoughts that might have questioned the seeds perfection. some people just seemed to think well the seed has to be perfect, so it must be me thats wrong....when it wasnt them. they were seeing parts of the truth.

Anonymous:
Anonymous,
I get what you are saying here. Sure I was court ordered into the seed. Yes, I fought signing the intake paper. No, I didn't want to be there. Yes, I was scared- only because I had no idaea what the seed was all about. For myself, I listened to the raps, and low and behold, I started learning something about myself. I was 17 yrs old in 1973 St.Pete seed. I had been running away all the time, selling drugs, doing every drug I could get my hands on, I drank myself to oblivion, had some very bad trips, and lost it on PCP at school. I helped with strong armed robbery, broke into cars and homes. I would hit my mom with anything I could grab a hold on, including an iron. I screwed up my families life. Me and my subconscious decisions.
I was just surviving. Not living, not feeling, just running. Away form what, whom??? Myself.
 In the seed I felt a part of something different. Sure I hated the 10 - 10's. Hvaing to live with the feamle staff for a month, but guess what? I learned I hated myself. I didn't even know what real feelings were. I was an empty shell walking around this planet without a clue.
  I became very close to many people, and believe it or not Susie Connors took me under her wing. I be able to go in the back office and sit there with her, just talking. She never talked down to me, she listened to me, and guided me.
To me, the seed is not a frickin cult. It was the only place in town where kids like me could go and learn something about myself, and have lifelong bonds of frienships. I have lost 17 old friends through overdose. I would be dead right along with them if my parents didn't make the choice to lift me up out of the streets and put me somewhere where I couldn't self-destruct anymore. I learned I had choices, and those choices I made would be good for me, or I would suffer the consequences. I am remaining anon because I can't stand drama, and I just don't choose to hear the rebuttles.
  That's all from me, a former seedling who is still alive and very happy.

marshall:
anon wrote:

---------qutoe------
"To me, the seed is not a frickin cult. It was the only place in town where kids like me could go and learn something about myself, and have lifelong bonds of frienships. I have lost 17 old friends through overdose. I would be dead right along with them if my parents didn't make the choice to lift me up out of the streets and put me somewhere where I couldn't self-destruct anymore. I learned I had choices, and those choices I made would be good for me, or I would suffer the consequences. I am remaining anon because I can't stand drama, and I just don't choose to hear the rebuttles."
----------

Since you're choosing not to hear this, I suppose it's pointless..but: Ever wonder why you can't stand the drama (of someone disagreeing with you or questioning what you say) or why you choose not to hear the rebuttals? Doesn't real honesty mean the willingness and ability to question ourselves and entertain the possibility that we may be mistaken? The Seed demanded that we do this in regards to our pre-seed life. So why not apply the same principle to examining our conclusions, beliefs and assumptions about the Seed program itself and the effects it might have had upon us? BTW, I think I learned some good things at the Seed too and was able to use them to positive effect...especially after I was out of the program itself. But this in no way inhibits my willingness to attempt to honestly examine the program or it's methodology. I'm glad you have a good and happy life. Happy holidays to all.

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