Treatment Abuse, Behavior Modification, Thought Reform > The Seed Discussion Forum
Group Think
marshall:
Well, I finally made good use of; "Made direct amends to those we had harmed." Ten years after graduating the seed I looked up my former best friend from high school (that's 'old druggie friend' in seed lingo) and apologized to him for being such an arrogant asshole right after I left the seed (& attempting to get him into the program). He graciously forgave me. I've done similar direct amends to several of my old friends. There were so many that I was rude and condescending towards simply because they smoked pot from time to time or drank alcohol. The seed reasoning was that if they were friends with me before the seed then they 'must' be horrible druggies.
It was part of the same all or nothing, good or evil thinking. 'Before I came to the seed I was a complete asshole, now I'm straight and happy and love everybody...' What a crock. I'd mouth this stuff at the time even though I was lonely & miserable at the seed. I wish I had all of the years the program (and court system) directly and indirectly stole from my youth. In my case, I literally had no choice but to complete the program. If I screwed-up, I would have been sent back to prison to serve the remainder of a 5 year sentence. Those were the terms of my probation. Talk about motivation for going with the program!
cleveland:
Marshall,
I wonder what, from your perspective now, would have made a difference when you were a kid? There are still a lot of these kinds of programs out there, using the same language and structure, justified because kids "need" them. You were in some serious trouble - what would have helped you then? If you could magically go back, what would you do for the person you were 20 or 30 years ago?
marshall:
I would simply try to be a friend to that person and listen to his concerns with an open heart The serious trouble that I was in was of a legal sort. If I were living during the prohibition years and had been arrested for selling bathtub gin or illegal whiskey it would have been a similar type of trouble. I use no illegal drugs but I am opposed to the nation's drug laws. Prohibition does not work and creates more harm in it's attempt to alleviate drug use. I don't know that I needed any specific help other than being allowed to be a typical teenager, testing limits, rebeling and growing up without being subjected to adult prison and a mind control cult at 17. My best guess is that I would have outgrown my fascination with drugs...just as I've witnessed countless other teens pass thru this phase to go on to live happy, productive lives.
Ft. Lauderdale:
Marshall, I do remember you I think - glasses?- 5 years of time wasn't just handed out for being a bad boy was it? So you went to the Seed for a much cushier time. Sorry Pal something is missing here? Unless everyone in the Georgia court system had it out for you as a 17yr old. Am I missing something?
Ft. Lauderdale:
I really do feel a certain percentage of kids would have stopped doing drugs and grown out of it on their own if they had a decent family and were just normal teenagers. I personally didn't see alot of "normal" ones. Yes some people were overboard about things. I really never got into hero worship or was moonie like. Have you ever seen kids durring a pep rally I never got into that when I was a kid either. School spirit. I needed something and the seed is what I got... and It did help me. I said why we sing jingle bells...and felt a little uncomfortable doing it but I think that was good for me. Yes I really do. It helped break me out of the depressed slump or lethargic attitudes I posessed. I never had a nice christmas as a kid someone was always calling the police on someone or someone was getting hit or yelled at or something along these lines ::boohoo:: I know you may say whatever...
Yes I was the perfect moonie canidate (is that dating myself?) I don't know what one says today about that. People showed me kindness. This I desperatly needed. I wasn't yelled at and locked in a room and I went to the bathroom by myself. It helped me yes I did need to move on did I yes.
Was I envolved for a long time- yes. Did I ever witness abuse -no. Did I ever see a kid get yelled at- yes. Was the Seed perfect-No. I have never heard Antigen or even you Greg(funny I always feel like I talking to Greg???) Talk about anything nice or good about your experience. Was it just hell on a daily basis? or was your heart touched by anyone or ??? Antigen I know you were never on the program but did't anything ever strike you as nice or good? I really do want to know.
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