I take it the jury or sentencing judge did not put much weight on the tesitmony quoted here. Having assisted in the defense of more than one first degree murder case I can say that it's a terrible thing for everyone. Tragic for the victim and family, tragic for the defendant and family. Tragic for the persons who have to prosecute and defend. Even more tragic when persons who have been victims themselves become the perpetrators. Even more tragic still when things that are suposed to help people only end up making the situation so much worse.
My heart hurts for these folks. But logic tells me that most of them actually did what they are accused of doing. What hurts is that so many of them have been so stripped of personal value and so morally degraded that they attach no value at all to their life or the lives of other people. when that is the case, it just appears to us who are on the outside, that it was easy for them to kill. Or, in some cases, they fight back with such overwhleming ferocity (sp?) that they lose control and kill by accident - or even worse, they over-kill on purpose. Odd concept, but it happens.
Maybe some of you reading this might remember going to some place in your mind, escaping to a place where that wasn't filled with the negative Seed. I gues we who were able to do that kind og escaping/traveling are the lucky ones. I've said it here before: No one is inherenetly bad and I really belive that - even guys like this. something happened.
I've had to "shut down" to make it through some expericences - especially later in my life when I was the victim in a physically, ect. abusive marriage. It was only then, at that moment when I choose to walk away because some small inner voice told me that I had no ability to eract in-kind that I became afraid of what I could do. nd - onlells you you can't react in kind - That's when I realized how close I'd been to crossing that line - how just one more little push could have made the difference.
My professional work has helped move me away from that, but reading just this one excerpt brings it all back. Very chilling.
Maybe based on my experiences I could be claimed as a Seed success, but I don't believe I'll allow them to take credit. Afterall, if it wasn't for all of the stripping away expereiced in the program, I might have had enough of a sense of self to have made other choices in my life. Any way, thanks be to the good powers in the world for sparing me and my baby from all that could have been.
Thanks, too Greg, for the oppotunity to tell my "success" story. I didn't kill someone.
T