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Offline blownawaytheidahoway

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RAPS, the down and dirty.
« on: November 16, 2004, 01:02:00 PM »
OK. Let's have a rap.

Alright, I'll start:

First of all, I want to remember more. (I'm a real glutton for punishment, see emergent patterns from BM programs)
Secondly, I want to understand more about the methods carried out and the desired ends of the "facilitators". Translation: what the fuck were they thinking?
Thirdly, I want to understand the the history of this conflictive form of therapy. Was this approach a norm in cultic intimicy? There is a heap of issues tied up in this query: It is true in my opinion, that without the raps being as unrestrained as they were, the entire program would have failed in it's necessary quasi-complete fear based brainwashing method. I really, really thought the entire place was bugged my first several weeks. I just couldn't understand why Caroline Wolfe warned me on my third day that she knew what I had been up to, and that heard everything...shit...I believed that after she told me what I had been up to!
Fourthly, the encouragement all of us received to participate fully in blowing others away or for blowing snot with convincing emotion to pass the specific facilitator muster, cannot be ignored. If you remained recalcitrant for too long your number was up and you would have weeks of enduring screaming by any combination of facilitator/older students. Complying was mandatory! I was scared of snapping my first year. I learned to subjugate myself in order to escape more verbal assaults. It's never left me, but I'm trying to explore this...

The down and dirty of the whole implementation of "breaking kids down" was done regardless of what the individual in the hot seat really needed. Oh, CEDUites can claim that those assaults and specific "endictments"/ comments are as real as the CEDU philosophy, but herein is the problem.

I expect to explore this over the next several months and hope to invite all to comment in this string. Let's keep it honest. I especially hope to hear from Ex-Staffers. The insights they could bring would be invalueable. I'm just getting cocky now because I'm sure that ain't spelled right. But in all sincerity let's just see how low we can go.
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 07:00:00 PM by Guest »
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Life is a very wonderful thing.\' said Dr. Branom... \'The processes of life, the make- up of the human organism, who can fully understand these miracles?... What is happening to you now is what should happen to any normal healthy human organism...You are being made sane, you are being made healthy.
     \'That I will not have, \' I said, \'nor can understand at all. What you\'ve been doing is to make me feel very very ill.\'
                         -Anthony Burgess
                      A Clockwork Orange

Offline Anonymous

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RAPS, the down and dirty.
« Reply #1 on: November 16, 2004, 03:58:00 PM »
tell us the staff with commentary name by name and the cedu connection
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Offline blownawaytheidahoway

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RAPS, the down and dirty.
« Reply #2 on: November 16, 2004, 05:44:00 PM »
Who wasn't mean at times?
Who wasn't prone to have a bad day and take it out on a student they thought was bratty, spoiled, nasty, or just a plain easy target.
Which staff wasn't expected to carry out their duty to back other powerstaffers and support them in their conquests of verbal bloodletting?
Which staff didn't get caught up the need for oneupsmanship in the Dirt sessions versus the need for honesty by telling bizzarre truths that should better have remained hidden away from students?
Were there staff who cared to take a different approach to raps and how long did they last?
How many times did you see the new staff whom you liked, who you thought was a softie (and also arrived to work their first day with a spouse???) turn into an ogre after having been humiliated in front of a bunch of kids by one of the wolfish powerstaffers?
The whole damn system from top to bottom was a machine dedicated to the power pecking order! And you just knew that students could only do what they did for emotional survival.

Don't clam up people!
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 07:00:00 PM by Guest »
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Life is a very wonderful thing.\' said Dr. Branom... \'The processes of life, the make- up of the human organism, who can fully understand these miracles?... What is happening to you now is what should happen to any normal healthy human organism...You are being made sane, you are being made healthy.
     \'That I will not have, \' I said, \'nor can understand at all. What you\'ve been doing is to make me feel very very ill.\'
                         -Anthony Burgess
                      A Clockwork Orange

Offline Anonymous

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RAPS, the down and dirty.
« Reply #3 on: November 20, 2004, 02:25:00 PM »
Let it all out! :wave:
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Offline Helena Handbasket

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RAPS, the down and dirty.
« Reply #4 on: November 20, 2004, 04:09:00 PM »
Quote
On 2004-11-16 10:02:00, blownawaytheidahoway wrote:

"OK. Let's have a rap.



Alright, I'll start:



First of all, I want to remember more. (I'm a real glutton for punishment, see emergent patterns from BM programs)

Secondly, I want to understand more about the methods carried out and the desired ends of the "facilitators". Translation: what the fuck were they thinking?

Thirdly, I want to understand the the history of this conflictive form of therapy. Was this approach a norm in cultic intimicy? There is a heap of issues tied up in this query: It is true in my opinion, that without the raps being as unrestrained as they were, the entire program would have failed in it's necessary quasi-complete fear based brainwashing method. I really, really thought the entire place was bugged my first several weeks. I just couldn't understand why Caroline Wolfe warned me on my third day that she knew what I had been up to, and that heard everything...shit...I believed that after she told me what I had been up to!

Fourthly, the encouragement all of us received to participate fully in blowing others away or for blowing snot with convincing emotion to pass the specific facilitator muster, cannot be ignored. If you remained recalcitrant for too long your number was up and you would have weeks of enduring screaming by any combination of facilitator/older students. Complying was mandatory! I was scared of snapping my first year. I learned to subjugate myself in order to escape more verbal assaults. It's never left me, but I'm trying to explore this...



The down and dirty of the whole implementation of "breaking kids down" was done regardless of what the individual in the hot seat really needed. Oh, CEDUites can claim that those assaults and specific "endictments"/ comments are as real as the CEDU philosophy, but herein is the problem.



I expect to explore this over the next several months and hope to invite all to comment in this string. Let's keep it honest. I especially hope to hear from Ex-Staffers. The insights they could bring would be invalueable. I'm just getting cocky now because I'm sure that ain't spelled right. But in all sincerity let's just see how low we can go.  "


It all started here:  http://religiousmovements.lib.virginia. ... nanon.html
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uly 21, 2003 - September 17, 2006

Offline Helena Handbasket

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RAPS, the down and dirty.
« Reply #5 on: November 20, 2004, 04:45:00 PM »
Here's about as down and dirty as you can get: http://morrock.com/synanon.htm

Straight from a horse's mouth.
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uly 21, 2003 - September 17, 2006

Offline Anonymous

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RAPS, the down and dirty.
« Reply #6 on: November 22, 2004, 10:05:00 AM »
blownawy tells it like it is. I forgot so much yelling crying lying screaming and yelling. Picking on people anyone who resisted anything anyone who yelled back and got defensive. i remember black chairs and boxes of tiissues andmy ass falling asleep from four hours of not moving. I hated raps i hated raps i hated raps. so much lying and mean people picking on kids. seems being nice was not allowed.
why why why
 :evil:
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Offline Son Of Serbia

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RAPS, the down and dirty.
« Reply #7 on: November 22, 2004, 12:54:00 PM »
I hate raps, they are useless, have absolutely no theraputic value, and although at times they were entertaining, raps were nonetheless a total waste of time.  I got nothing out of them except for some very bad memories of other people's problems, which I never wanted to hear about in the first place.

I didn't want to hear about the girl who got ganged raped every night at the foster home, or about the guy who fucked his sister, or even his brother (I heard that one too). One guy used to make the dog lick his dick.  I never needed to know how many times so & so made herself throw up, or how many times a week some guy jerks off in the shower fantasizing about raping his dorm mates.  One guy used to stuff carrots up his ass to entertain his friends at parties, he even let people take pictures.....WHY THE FUCK DID I NEED TO HEAR ALL THAT????

I was a stupid, skinny, 14 year kid. I thought I knew everything when I really didn't know shit.... just like any other normal teenager!

Did I really need to know how many different places one could shoot heroin?  Did I really need to hear some 45 year old guy (Rudy Bentz) talk about how great it felt to fuck a piece of warm liver thru a hole in a milk carton? Or how about what it feels like to be fucked by your own father?  Did I really need to hear a 30+ year old male staff (steve laird) recall how tight a 13 year old pussy is?.... FUCK NO!!!

And what pray tell did these kids really get out of revealing all of this embarassing personal information (cop outs), besides humiliation that is?  

Did they find real compassion, understanding, or even some sound wisdom and/or guidance to ease their guilt?....FUCK NO!!! They got nothing of the sort from the child fucking, white trash, cedu criminals to whom they confided in.  Instead staff took this information and used it to degrade and label these kids.  They beat down on these kids over and over again. They broke both spirits and hearts,not to mention minds. For many former students, the damage that raps inflicted is irreversible.

Raps are nothing but a very sick tool that Cedu uses to exercise control, and in the use of their tool, Cedu staff know no limits to their cruelty.
Raps are sick, but then again, what else can you
expect from Cedu?

.[ This Message was edited by: SON OF SERBIA on 2004-11-22 13:22 ]
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Offline Son Of Serbia

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RAPS, the down and dirty.
« Reply #8 on: November 22, 2004, 12:58:00 PM »
[ This Message was edited by: SON OF SERBIA on 2004-11-22 13:20 ]
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Offline ProgramAHolic

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RAPS, the down and dirty.
« Reply #9 on: November 23, 2004, 10:53:00 PM »
Staff will tell you "You are only going to get out of the rap what you put into the rap" Now what does that mean?  In their minds it means pour your little heart out into everyone else's open hands so that they can tear it into nice little shreds and stab you once their done.  The staff get a sick thrill out of watching the students break down and crushing their world.  By putting a lot into raps you will ultimately get fucked over by staff for saying things they didn't know about, that they don't want you to say, or simply because they can.  You will also lose trust from those other students and be feared for what you might drag them into.  Raps are an easy way for staff to get the juicy information that they could not get themselves because they weren't doing their job properly.  Why help the students and guide them along when the students can just tell you everything that has gone "wrong" or what the staff missed?
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Offline blownawaytheidahoway

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RAPS, the down and dirty.
« Reply #10 on: November 28, 2004, 10:55:00 AM »
[ This Message was edited by: blownawaytheidahoway on 2006-04-11 05:31 ]
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 07:00:00 PM by Guest »
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Life is a very wonderful thing.\' said Dr. Branom... \'The processes of life, the make- up of the human organism, who can fully understand these miracles?... What is happening to you now is what should happen to any normal healthy human organism...You are being made sane, you are being made healthy.
     \'That I will not have, \' I said, \'nor can understand at all. What you\'ve been doing is to make me feel very very ill.\'
                         -Anthony Burgess
                      A Clockwork Orange

Offline Son Of Serbia

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RAPS, the down and dirty.
« Reply #11 on: November 29, 2004, 04:08:00 PM »
(BlownAway)  I'm not quite sure what it is that you're asking me, but I most definately stand behind everything I've said here about cedu and raps.

Could you be a little more specific?
Thanks.
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Offline blownawaytheidahoway

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« Reply #12 on: November 29, 2004, 05:18:00 PM »
I am trying to kick up more shit. For me, mostly. But I also want to keep the dialogue happening becuase I need the input. It keeps me inspired to try to capture the totalitarianism of the thing. When it seems a bit overwhelming I've taken to reading through the archive pages here. It would be cool to continue conversations that seemed to have died weeks/months ago. It's the coolest thing about a site like this and finding people like me and you. I go through and see how timid I was at first. Not sure if being angry was ok. It is in this veign that I try to revive it for myself here. I just see that there are only like four or five of us who are constantly pecking away, drilling cedu, re-invigorating the fight, feeding the monkey, putting forward our arguments...and I'm the newbie. But I need you guys. I'm trying to bring fresh interest to this site. New viewers who are education/law specialists. I went to Cedualumni.com and started talking some shit there too. Let's shake this tree! Raps were so fucked up. When I was reading on some conversations that I wasn't around for I saw comments that I wanted to bring to the topic I had recently created. It is then that I posted to you...and also to get my all important rap subject back to the top of the list!
Sorry, guess I'm long winded.
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 07:00:00 PM by Guest »
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Life is a very wonderful thing.\' said Dr. Branom... \'The processes of life, the make- up of the human organism, who can fully understand these miracles?... What is happening to you now is what should happen to any normal healthy human organism...You are being made sane, you are being made healthy.
     \'That I will not have, \' I said, \'nor can understand at all. What you\'ve been doing is to make me feel very very ill.\'
                         -Anthony Burgess
                      A Clockwork Orange

Offline iknowcedulies

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RAPS, the down and dirty.
« Reply #13 on: November 29, 2004, 06:10:00 PM »
staff are coerced into abusing by being fined if they do not do what the leader says    students buy into because they are easily conned and are desperate to show others that they are "serious" about the place and that the place "works" and that they have "friends" and that they are "loyal" .  it is all designed for them to get their way and you to be under their control so they can shake you and the state down for however long it suits them. they use the excuse of their "familys".   under cedu logic  the nazi's were okay as long as they were loyal to each other.  that means the kids are being used and if anyone deprogams them they are to be stopped by any means necessary and that means calling all the parents and turning them against those who have discovered that it is a racket run by those who do not know what they are doing and followed by kids who only want acceptance by their "friends".
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Offline equestrienne

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RAPS, the down and dirty.
« Reply #14 on: March 22, 2005, 02:09:00 PM »
Quote
On 2004-11-16 10:02:00, blownawaytheidahoway wrote:

Thirdly, I want to understand the the history of this conflictive form of therapy. Was this approach a norm in cultic intimicy? There is a heap of issues tied up in this query: It is true in my opinion, that without the raps being as unrestrained as they were, the entire program would have failed in it's necessary quasi-complete fear based brainwashing method. I really, really thought the entire place was bugged my first several weeks. I just couldn't understand why Caroline Wolfe warned me on my third day that she knew what I had been up to, and that heard everything...shit...I believed that after she told me what I had been up to!


if you want to understand this history - the "raps" (called "forums" at Cascade) were based on the Synanon Game. you can read about it here:
http://religiousmovements.lib.virginia. ... nanon.html
cedu = charles e. dederich university. don't buy that see - do crap.
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