Honesty (aka Self-Disclosure)- The first and most important rule. Honesty meant disclosing everything that was in my head all the time- keeping no secrets from the group. Honesty meant talking in the morning about how I considered masturbating the night before & relating about how I found the strength in the first step to resist. Honesty meant talking about how "admitting that I was powerless over thoughts of self gratification" and "trusting God and Straight Inc.", I could keep myself from acting on these perverted druggie thoughts. There is a line in a Grateful Dead song that nailed this concept for me: "Honest to the point of recklessness, self-centered to the extreme". Honestly meant making self incriminating statements in group, trusting that no one would later tell the police about it. Often this resulted in Straight Inc. threatening to obtain court orders. No client could progress through Straight Inc. without adopting full self-disclosure as a way of life.
Confidentiality (aka Secrecy)- Confidentiality meant never revealing anything to anyone outside Straight Inc. about what happened inside Straight Inc. To do so meant risking the lives of all the people enrolled, past present & future. (by the Straight Inc. standard I am risking peoples sobriety by composing this website). We were told that people outside Straight Inc. would not understand. WE were told that talking to outsiders about Straight Inc. could get Straight Inc. shut down, and that we would be risking the lives of all the clients to do so. What I do, and say and hear here, remains here.
No talking behind backs-This was the ultimate tool for breaking lateral associations. Lets suppose I witnessed Jane talking to Sue about flowers, or Bill and Bob discussing departure from the program. In order to reference these events in the future I would have to say something like "I saw two female fourth phasers talking about flowers" or " I was told that two male fifth phasers were discussing ways to cop out" etc. This avoided direct reference by name to anyone. However, If I were a person in group talking to a fifth phaser about a chain of command report turning someone in for suspicious behavior or thought, then I could name names. Or if directly inquired by a staff trainee or higher I could name names. Only in very rare instances was anyone allowed to name names in front of the entire group, and then it was a dramatic incident with many upper staff members and maybe even clinicians in the room.
Knock on all doors before entering-The idea was that behind any door may be people discussing information that was not for my ears. Therefore one must never open a door and walk through it without a verbal confirmation to enter. On the other hand, when a trainee or higher approaches a door that is guarded, then the sentry would open the door for the staff member as a sign of respect.
Eat everything on your plate-This rule was often enforced in a violent and abusive way. Often the food was so unpalatable that no one wanted to eat it. But newcomers were often forced to eat what was on their plates. Sometimes we had as little as ten minutes to eat and then our food was taken away. It was dependant on the whimsy of the staff, the time constraints, and the level of intensity of the group.
Always talk about myself-This involved relating to raps with "I" Statements exclusively. "You" statements would invite criticism, repeated violations would invite hostile confrontation.
Respect the chain of command-There are really two rules here: 1. Know all the names and all the staff levels at all times. 2. Do not speak to anyone outside of the direct chain of command unless told to do so. So a newcomer would first speak to his oldcomer, who might refer him to a fifth phaser in group, who might take a note down on a small piece of paper. He could pass it along to the staff trainee on duty, or next level of staff on duty at the time, or let it wait until the regular C.O.C. pass-through time each day. At no time would any phaser engage a staff member in conversation without following the C.O.C. to do so would invite aggressive confrontation and possibly restraint in the form of a gagged mouth.
No one enters or leaves group without staff permission-This applies to every phaser. For example, I am a fourth phaser taking a newcomer back to the intake rooms, we have to stop at the guarded door and wait for staff acknowledgment to the sentry before he would allow us to exit the room. No exceptions. Only trainees or higher could walk in and out of group at will. Staff could allow for "In and Outs" for individuals involved in ongoing projects or responsibilities.
No druggie clothes or druggie ties of any kind (friends or hangouts)-This was a prohibition on anything that was a tie to a client's past. Clothing, music, pictures, names, high school yearbooks, etc. These things were all thrown away in the name of breaking these ties to the past. We were coerced and pressured into reporting all these kinds of ties via the C.O.C. Staff would report this information to parents who would dispose of clients property indiscriminately.
No druggie friends in the same foster home-No one who had done drugs together in the past, or who had common ties that were related to drugs in the past, could ever be housed together. To do so was to risk a stronger than normal lateral alliance.
No eye games- This meant that we were not to make eye contact with other people sitting in group. We were not to attempt, or respond to any attempt, to communicate via eye contact. This behavior would invite rigorous verbal assault and if continued would invite aggressive or violent physical battery.
No talking out in group- This prohibited any conversation, or utterance of any kind. The only person talking in group was the person who had been recognized by the staff. Talking out in group meant verbal assault and would regularly lead to physical battery.
Pay attention to the person talking- This meant that I was expected to intently listen to and look at the person talking at all times. Any failure to do so would result in an immediate physical assault from another group member. My face would be turned towards the person talking often against my will and in a violent fashion. Any resistance to this forced physical battery would result in a full assault by multiple clients, which typically ended with a five point restraint. Paying attention to the person talking was very important.
Newcomers wait 3 days to relate, 14 days to progress- New intakes had to wait three days in order to have the right to speak in group. It was expected that a new intake would get motivated even though if called on by staff this person would have to stand up and say "I am not allowed to relate yet" and sit back down. New intakes had to wait 14 days before they were eligible to request advancement of any kind. Talk or T&R first, eventually asking to go home (second phase).
No playing off- A classic cult lingo thing - Playing off referred to the typical adolescent process of trying to manipulate parents with strategic questions. We were strictly prohibited from asking multiple authorities the same question, we simply had to learn to value of obedience.
No talking in lines or in bathroom- Each Day we were lined up at least three times to move around. Sometimes for dinner or a rap in another room; always at night before leaving. We were never allowed to talk during these lines. We were not allowed to talk in the bathroom either. This had a dramatic long range effect on most of us- we do not talk in bathrooms. Furthermore, for years my "bathroom time" was so traumatized by this and other practices that I can not stand to have anyone in a bathroom with me, it would trigger a panic attack. A decade of my life without the pleasure of sharing a bath with my spouse.
No asking staff or fifth phasers questions during raps- In between raps, during bathroom breaks, during dinner and lunch etc, these were the times to ask fifth phasers questions. Asking staff questions just really never happened unless a staff member encouraged it during a break or meal.
Dress respectfully, no shirts with decals or letters on them in group- For us in Straight-Atlanta this was interpreted as : no blue jeans, no t-shirts, shirts with collars only, for girls it was about the same, a blouse and slacks were the way to go.
No reading, TV, radio or playing an instrument until third phase. Second phasers may read the bible.- This was at times interpreted to include the writing on a cereal box, or the label of a shampoo bottle in the shower. It is a strange thing to be completely cut of from the information in the world around you. Newcomers caught reading illicitly would face instant verbal assault and potential physical battery.
No R rated movies. No pro-drug music, radio stations or TV shows.- The funny thing is that one persons pro-drug music was another's anti-drug music. we would often sing "Fire and Rain" while in group. I used to listen to it on drugs. Of course since we had all reported our "druggie" ties and music, we could be watched to insure that we did not listen to anything that we had listened to in the past. Our ties to our own pasts were completely cut.
No make-up, jewelry, wallets, watches, belts, money or identification.-From second phase forward you can wear a belt. From third phase forward you can carry a wallet with ID and wear a watch. Third phasers may carry necessary daily funds, fourth phasers may carry $10, fifth phasers may carry $15.
No Mouthwash or Cologne- Both contained alcohol, and at anytime, anyone of us might decide to get drunk by drinking this stuff. Also these things could be used to hide the smell of drugs. Finally, this stuff was "window dressing" or "gilding the lily" and we were supposed to be focused on our "drug problem" not our bad breath or body odor.
If you are sick and in need of medical attention in the building, use the chain of command and/or the medication line; at home ask your parent or the host parent for medical assistance through your oldcomer.- Many people considered this one of the prime problems with Straight Inc. Access to a medical doctor was tenuous at best. Chain of command requests could take a day to go through. A good fifth phaser might force some through, but doing so too often could invite verbal assault. The biggest problem here, the first step in the chain of command is not a clinician or even a nurse. It was most often a kid from 15-21 years old who had to make an assessment on the fly about whether a medical complaint was valid and/or serious enough to risk being attacked himself for forcing these concerns up the chain of command. The medication line was where we could pick up our prescribed meds, but we had to have pre-approved staff permission for even an aspirin. Some oldcomers and host families saw this as meaning that giving an aspirin to a kid might cause him to cop out and do drugs again. So we were regularly denied access to over the counter medications. During colds and flu's we were not allowed to take standard cold remedies due to their alcohol content. We were not allowed to use OTC palliatives at all without a complex pre-approval process that was often unproductive. We were never allowed to carry our medications on our person. Finally, what if we did give an aspirin in a foster home and the kid had a allergic reaction ? Then what ? I still believe that many foster parents would have phoned a fifth phaser or a staff member, before calling 911.
No stopping off to or from the building, check out all stop offs- This meant that we were not allowed to stop at the store, or to get gas or any other diversion during travel to or from the building or home. We could get specific staff permission to stop off for gas or such issues on a one time basis each time we needed it. This often had to do with the risk level of our newcomers and the neighborhood of our stop-off. There was a specific lingo for requesting a stop off and it was always at the end of the night. We would get bogged down in this process of requesting our stop-offs and drop-offs. Drop-offs differed from stop-offs, a drop-off meant leaving my newcomers at someone else's house for transport to the building (like carpooling). This could get complicated if you had druggie friends or ties in the process etc. This was one of the points that full self-disclosure was a big expectation. Newcomers who identified potential problems with stop-offs and drop-offs due to druggie associations saved the staff both trouble and time.
No hitchhiking or picking up hitchhikers- DUH ! I can recall that when I withdrew the first time I was walking down Delk Road at night, and phasers were drivign by on the way home - they honked at me, it felt like shit for sure.
No borrowing money- Strictly forbidden and both parties involved could expect strong verbal assault.
Report all possible cop-outs- This was an essential tool for staff. Anyone who had a suspicion about another phaser could report that phaser via the chain of command. The reported phaser, who may have done nothing wrong other than expressing an undesirable thought, could expect verbal assault and a possible setback.
No talking to cop-outs, terminations or withdrawals- Anyone who had left Straight Inc. without seven stepping was off limits. This included ones own family members. Brothers and sisters, mothers and fathers were split apart because someone left early. Additionally phasers were strongly discouraged from associating with seven steppers.
Report all suspicious persons around the building or the foster home- Anyone who was hanging around the building or the foster homes would be reported. We were told that there were people who wanted to break our confidentiality and who might want to get us back onto drugs. Looking back I have to laugh at this idea. That any of my friends from Huntsville Alabama would come to Atlanta and try to get me back on drugs was a ludicrous proposition. Most of my friends, so called druggies, were moving along with their college careers and becoming fully realized people, while I was languishing in a mind control facility run by neo-puritans.
No listening to the radio or watching TV while writing your moral inventory- A moral inventory was quiet time each night and was a very important thing. Listening to the radio or watching TV would ruin the process by distraction.
No hanging out in the parking lot- We were not to hang around the building unnecessarily. If we had business or we were meeting a friend for a permission we were to get in and get out.
No lifting weights until third phase- This was to prevent any early phasers from becoming distracted from their drug problems.
No use of the telephone until fourth phase except for dime therapy on second and third phases- Literally this means that no first phaser may ever use a phone. Second and third phasers can call other phasers, failure to participate in dime therapy would lead to a setback or verbal assault. Dime therapy, the process of calling other phasers and fine tuning the compulsive confession syndrome, went on through aftercare.
No sending or receiving packages or letters, and no answering the door, until fourth phase- In theory this was to prevent our druggie friends from sending us drugs via the mail. In practice it meant that our grandparents and extended family could not write to us with their support or encouragement. Answering the door was considered dangerous, there could be old druggie friends at the door, or worse there could be trial lawyers waiting out there to help the phaser sue the program. If a neighbor came over for a cup of sugar, they would be asked to wait outside and never allowed to see the newcomers.
Maintain the anonymity of foster parents while on first phase- This related to the times that as a first phaser I earned talk with my parents. I was not to reveal the name or location of my foster home in any form. My parents were not to ask about it, nor were they to inquire about it from staff. It was a taboo topic for parents. Parents who were foster parents were not allowed to reveal who was a newcomer in their home to anyone. In this way Straight Inc. assured that no family that was new to the program could make the decision to pull their kid out in the middle of the night, or without intense confrontation from staff first. Straight Inc. was well aware that parents, in addition to clients, were more likely to "cop-out" in the first phase of the program.
A parent must be in the foster home with phasers at all times- A good idea, I have to admit this is a really good idea. Of course leaving this kids in the homes of non-clinicians was insane to start with, but at least we were not left alone with the teenage tyrants.
What I hear in staff office or the lobby remains there- Things that I overhear or aspects of conversations I have in these two areas must not be repeated.
No phasers in file room, staff office, or the executive area without staff permission- I do not recall any phaser ever entering the staff office. Phasers who self withdraw or were being terminated would get one on one counseling with the clinical staff. No phaser had any reason to enter the file room.
No knives, scissors or sharp objects around newcomers- Newcomers were in essence prisoners under constant suspicion. Many is the time I can remember someone sneaking a plastic fork or knife home to carve in their own arms or some such self abuse. In a foster home this lead to complex dramatic behavior to insure that a newcomer did not get up and run across the room, grab the knife out of the hand that feeds them and kill the foster family. Of course if these kids were really this violent they should never have been sent to a foster home in the first place.
Newcomers may not talk to each other, a oldcomer may supervise nuke-to-nuke therapy- In group as a newcomer I was too busy working on my drug problem to be giving advice to others. At home there were times when one newcomer could really help another to adapt, so oldcomers could hold little mini raps at home to let nukes talk to each other.
Banking is limited to a joint bank account with parental co-signature required for all withdrawals or checks- This really applies to third phase or higher. For some kids whose parents needed to be able to write checks in their name it was from day one.
No taking photographs of phasers or parents- Obviously this would have threatened the secrecy of the cult. Of course when straight wanted the press to take pictures of an open meeting they would let them. I seem to vaguely remember being instructed to sign a release at one time for some such media coverage.
Nobody enters or leaves executive rap- This means that if I need to use the bathroom during an exec rap that was just too bad. I should hold it till the rap is over. Exec rap typically lasted 2 hours and we were offered the chance to use the bathroom prior to the rap. But what if I didn't need to go then & had to go fifteen minutes later? Can you imagine what it is like to be told you can not go to the bathroom ? Some clients did end up soiling themselves prior to being allowed to relieve themselves.
No animals in the building- Seemingly A simple common sense rule. But I have learned since that many facilities treating adolescents have found that animals are therapeutic. Straight Inc. just didn't want us to have any kind of link to the natural world or the outside world. As flawed, twisted, morally corrupt & diseased individuals we had been privileged to ever pet an animal, and now we had to earn this right back through our suffering, self-disclosure and guilt.
Report cards must be sent through the chain of command- This meant that I was required to bring my report card to the building and turn it in to a fifth phaser. A bad grade or comment would lead to verbal assault. Often these assaults would lead to setbacks or startovers.
If you are late you make up one day for yourself and one day for each of your newcomers- Group started at a certain time each day, being on time was defined as having my newcomers and myself settled into group and ready to motivate at the start of the first rap. Being late meant that I had to spend one of my days off in group. If I had two newcomers with me, then I had to spend three of my future days off in group. Second and third phasers could loose our days off when we made fourth phase as a result of tardiness during our earlier phases. I remember one family that had a chronic tardiness problem, and this person spent the first month of his fourth phase with no days off due to being late so often as a second and third phaser.
Dime Therapy- Before going home on second phase, one must collect the phone numbers of 3 fourth phasers, 2 fifth phasers, 1 trainee and 1 junior staff member. This list would grow over time. However, as staff members departed and group members graduated, we had to remove their names and numbers from our dime therapy lists. retaining contact information about such persons was to invite confrontation.
To use dime therapy on second and third phase- I ask the parent or foster parent to dial the phone and confirm that the number reached is a phaser. Then I can talk on the phone. A parent must also answer the phone for any second or third phaser.
Permissions-Permissions must be filled out and in the box 72 hours prior to the start of the permission. Permissions have to be detailed, with all the data about who, where, when, what, why, how of the trip. A trip to the mall was a common permission. The Zoo was a big one. Eventually mixed sex permissions were also required. That was always uncomfortable for at least one or two of the kids involved. Sometimes it was the first time they had been alone with other male and female peers for years. Fifth phasers did not require a permission when accompanied by their own parents or foster parents. Fifth phasers only had to have 24 hours advance notice for a permission.
Fourth phase permissions-Fourth phase permissions must be accompanied by an parent. As fourth phasers we were working on our social skills. This was often difficult for clients at first and having an adult around was an added measure of security. I remember people flipping out about eating in a restaurant that had a bar. I remember people becoming hysterical about seeing someone drinking or smoking in public. Fourth phase permissions were therefore often approved by staff with full knowledge that the planned trip would likely be a test of the clients sobriety.
Third phasers may go outside in the yard if accompanied by a parent- This was possibly the only time in my life that I wanted to mow the grass.
Third phase work/school permission- at the beginning of third phase we got a three hour permission to go get clothing or books or register or get our job. This first permission must be with a parent, and had very limited rights. Having a luxury like a meal at a restaurant, or doing anything not directly related to the act of going back to school or work would invite intense verbal assault and most often a set back of some kind. This was often a first test of the humility and self disclosure of the client. Parents were encouraged to report the mood and behavior of these third phasers. Even requests as simple as a chocolate bar were reported to staff.
Fourth Phasers Time In- Fourth Phasers must be in the building by 6:30 on school days. Open meeting nights (Mon & Fri) at 5:30. being late would result in confrontation. Being late without a good reason would mean a setback.
Extracurricular activities- No sports or clubs until fifth phase. These activities were viewed as potential distractions from my drug problem. So ended my involvement in sports ( soccer, baseball, tennis) because of my drug treatment ? By the time I was eligible to return to my high school sports career I was so involved in Straight Inc. that spending time in group as a staff trainee was more important to me than sports. Being in control of other peoples lives is far more stimulating than being on a team.
Empathy and Sensitivity- This meant that in all my actions, I was to try and understand the emotional state of those who are relating or around me, and to be able to react to that state in a way that was consistent with the program. This could lead to profound moments of emotional connection between clients, and could also lead to vituperative attacks on non-compliant clients. A newcomer might be relating in a pat way, and an aggressive oldcomer might stand up and "apply empathy" and start yelling at the newcomer... "I was in your shoes one time, playing games, wasting time, I can empathize with you, but this is bullshit, you have to get out of your head and start working the program...etc . Empathy was used as a weapon as much as a tool in my program in Atlanta. Sensitivity, as in kindness, I do not remember much sensitivity of this kind in my days in group. I remember people poking at each other, and I remember people telling me that they were only sitting on me to be sensitive to my needs. I do not think this is what our society generally considers to be sensitive action with regard to teenagers who experiment with pot, or are victims of sexual abuse. Sensitivity also means "easily influenced, changed or damaged, esp. by a physical activity or effect" . This is certainly the definition that I would suggest applies to most survivors of Straight Inc.
Oldcomer Rules
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Oldcomers are responsible for the general supervision of a newcomer - This is far ranging statement but fails to reveal the scope of its own meaning. This meant that as an oldcomer I was responsible for all of the actions of my newcomers as well. I was responsible for seeing that the newcomer performed daily personal hygiene in detail. I was responsible for getting them to and from the building. I was responsible for seeing that they all write their MI's each night. I was responsible for seeing that they remember to bring in lunches. Every aspect of my newcomers life is my responsibility except dealing with their drug problems. That was the newcomers problem. And since I was doing everything else for them, I was going to be damn sure that my work was not wasted, I was going to insure that they complied. My own advancement on the phases was riding on this fact and I knew it.
Never turn my back on my newcomer-Newcomers were not to be trusted for even a second. At all times newcomers were to be treated as a potential threat to the lives of anyone around them, including themselves. From the first day in Straight Inc., even the first minute, everyone is brought to understand that they are a suicide threat. Within days that is internalized and the newcomer begins to believe that he or she really is a suicide threat and will confess to a suicidal ideation or similar concept as a way of gaining the groups acceptance. By never turning my back on my newcomer- I reinforce the concept all night long at home. This of course means that all newcomers must go through all daily bodily functions with some one watching their every move. No privacy, not even a second, for weeks, months and sometimes even years at time.
The oldcomer is responsible for seeing that the newcomer learns the tools for personal change (steps & signs etc) - It was my job as an oldcomer to insure that any newcomer living in the same home fully memorized the steps, signs and serenity prayer verbatim. Being one word off was not good enough, it had to be perfect. As I was taught, and so I taught many others- every word was selected for a reason and is very specific, so it is vital to memorize them correctly or it may throw the entire program off. If my newcomers failed to achieve this task in the first seven days then it would reflect most poorly on me and my foster home.
Oldcomers go over the newcomers Moral Inventory nightly - As an oldcomer I was required to review each of my newcomers Moral Inventories each night. I was to read the entire thing first while my newcomers waited quietly. Then I was to offer some feedback and enter into a therapeutic discussion with them regarding what they had written. Reviewing MI's took differing amounts of time with different newcomers. I do remember some nights staying up until 0300 or 0400 in this process. We would rise at 0600 the next day and go for twelve hours of group.
The oldcomer maintains supervision of the newcomer by the belt loop - Anytime day or night that my newcomer was outside of the main group room with me, I was expected to maintain complete physical control over them by holding onto their belt loop and the top of their pants. This involved running my middle finger through the loop and then twisting it up and over as I grab a handful of the back of the pants. In this fashion I could fairly well control exactly what the newcomer was doing. Three were foster homes who had devised ways to have certain rooms be "safe" so that oldcomers did not have to hold onto newcomers. Anytime a door was opened to the outside at a foster home the newcomers had to be restrained. This lead to thousands of episodes of chaos and stress in foster homes when a parent would return home from work or a grocery store etc. A simple knock at the door from a solicitor caused a flurry of activity as oldcomers scramble to restrain newcomers. The would generally end up in a shouted discussion to the effect of "we can't open the door".
Only fifth phasers with staff permission can be home alone - Being at home alone was for some reason considered to be truly dangerous. I guess the theory was "idle hands are the devils workshop". Even fifth phasers who spent time at home alone with any regularity faced the scrutiny of their peers or staff. Lower phasers, who sometimes had been sober and enrolled longer than the fifth phasers above them, were simply not trusted enough to allow this behavior.
Job hunting permissions and jobs must be approved by staff - All employment related actions had to have staff approval. Many kids who did go to work were employed by businesses owned by families within the program. There were clusters of phasers in jobs, once a manager got a taste of this completely respectful and obedient employee class, they would go back after more - aggressively. So employers in the area learned to tolerate the quirks of the program and come to see it as a great source of low maintenance, low cost labor.
Clients on third phase re-entering school do so on the following Thursday - This meant that no matter what a third phaser was going to spend at least three full days in group before returning to school. This was important observation time. Additionally this rule made it mandatory that a kid make a decision about school or work within 7 days of the phase change. Third phase was a transitory phase, not meant to be longer than 21 days.
Oldcomers must sleep in front of the door of the room holding newcomers - Oldcomers were required to put themselves bodily between a newcomer and the locked doors. If the room had windows large enough to climb out, then an oldcomer must be in front of the window as well.
During drop-offs insure that clients are inside the destination prior to departing - This was to prevent an oldcomer and their newcomers from being alone together. Leaving prior to their admission to the destination puts them at risk for copping out or facing a empty home or building with no way to travel. If the newcomer overpowered the oldcomer then they could be trailed in the car.
There are to be no items in a bedroom or bathroom around a newcomer that can be used as a weapon or to get high - AS above, nothing sharp, nothing with any alcohol, nothing that could be used to get high at all, and nothing that could be a weapon- that includes tooth floss, we could use it to strangle our oldcomers.
All clothes to the building 24 hours after a client leaves your home - we were supposed to deliver all clothes to the building within 24 hours of a foster home change. This was rarely achieved. For one thing these homes were often doing 3-6 loads of laundry a day, it was a nightmare, and getting someone's clothes sorted out of the pile was a struggle. We were expected to keep our names on all our clothing.
