Treatment Abuse, Behavior Modification, Thought Reform > Straight, Inc. and Derivatives
various people I'm remembering from Atlanta
kosmonaut:
Hey James, you have an amazing memory. Reading all those names brought back many faces. I'll be sending you an email.
hedwigfan:
Jim,
I'd love to hear from Cecile. My email address is jimkrislandt@msn.com. I have 12 year old twins. I finished med school in 2001 and am in the midst of anesthesia residency now.
I have no idea what I said to you, nor do I think I'd want to remember. I'm sorry for whatever I said and am sorry about what happened to you. I quit staff after that incident--Ashley, Letha, and I had taken that weekend off, and when we came back on Monday, it was clear that some bad shit had gone down over the weekend. I've run into survivors of that incident (Wesley) since then.
My memory from 83-85 is really poor, so I don't recall a lot of specifics. I have just now gotten into some intensive psychotherapy to start dealing with all this emotional baggage from Straight. i think we all suffer from PTSD to some extent. To make matters worse, my parents are still involved with other Straight parents and have a little straight group. I've never been able to escape it because they're at all the family gatherings.
i lived with letha for awhile after Straight. She kicked me out of our apartment after I realized I was neither an addict or alcoholic, and I haven't seen her since. I did get contacted by Abby Orr a few years ago for a Straight reunion, which I did not attend. ashley kilpatrick is married. Charles Clonts is still around. That's about all I know.
Please give my e-mail address to Cecile. Best wishes, Kris
kosmonaut:
--- Quote ---On 2002-10-10 23:41:00, Anonymous wrote:
Steve Callum- He was the guy who broke Mrs. ????'s nose. He had been smoking Jimson weed prior to admission, he was never altogther there. After he popped her, he was buried under a pile of phasers in the carpet room. He was taken away, rumour had it once I made trainee that he was taken up to the attic dungeon over the back dock and was severly beaten by a rotating group of fifth phasers who were highly trusted.
That was a Friday open meetign day I think, and we had an outdoor 'picnic' rap that next Sunday out in the little fenced in area on the side of the building. everyoen was having a great time, it was the first and to my knowlege only time we had been allowed an outdoor good time rap.
we were rollign along eating watermelon and having fun when it was decided that we needed to have a serious rap as well. Soon after we started the rap, Steve was trotted out in front of us, covered in bruises, and two Cobb County Sheriffs deputies came int othe area and arrested him for assualt and battery, felony charges, they took him away and we were all, ALL traumatized by that event.
Of course the fifth phasers who beat him up and covered him with bruises were not arrested for their own A&B on him overthe two days of isolation.
--- End quote ---
Hey James I believe his name was actually Mike McCallum (ClayL posted about this sometime back). I'm not much into violence but when Mike broke her jaw that was the ultimate statement about how our minds were being abused. That guy should have been put in psychiatric care, NOT Straight. I remember being horrified inside at how month after month they verbally and physically abused Mike, who at that point was just a shell of a human after 2 years of that kind of treatment. He didn't even register any facial expression or seem to understand what was happening around him. I remember there was some smartass 5th phaser, can't remember his name but he was a black guy, used to really get off on having Mike stand up in group so he could make fun of him. I wonder where that asshole is today.
I remember the outdoor bbq too. That was great getting some sun for a couple of hours. Amazing actually.
Anonymous:
Kris- I broke into tears after reading your last posting, thankyou for the apology, what you said is not really of consequence, this littel interaction has allowed me to work through some really heavy stuff moreso that I could have without making contact.
The cycle of abuse was difficult to break, as you were abused and manipulated, you aquired as we all did a "cult induced" personality that was not representative of your true self. The same was true of me, and that is why that awful nightmare in the bathroom took place.
I only hope that someday I will get the chance to apologize to young Mr. Ambrose. It chews me up inside what i became in that place, it was nothing like who I really am. I went os far as to revert ot my original name- James - Three years ago, and that was a part of my awakening process. As people in my new California life called out James- it is my belief that 'james' started to wwake up from the cult personality, whom I refer to as Jim these days.
If you have not already I strongly encourage you to read Dr. Lifton's writing on Thought Reform. It was a revelation for me. I found good therapy via refocus.org which has some listings for therapists that specialize in cult related abuse.
I always respected you Kris, and I am thrilled to hear that your life is progessing so wonderfully.
I have yet to go to school, but then I was living in a total daze for over 18 years, changing addresses two or three times a year, leaving no forwarding info, avoiding bank accounts and lots of other things out of fear of retribution from either the program or certain people who blamed me for their abuse.
I have settled down in Sacramento, and have established a domestic partnership with a wonderful man. I too came to the realization that I was neither a addict or alcoholic, and that I never was. I had been sexually abused for four years prior to experimenting with pot and alcohol, msot of the rest of the stuff I told them at my intake was made up- I was desparate, unconscious of it, but desparate to escape my sexual abusers, and the cult was ready to help me do that.
I am most enraged when I think about the fact that I revealed my sexual abuse during my intake in detail, and the program deliberately hid that from my parents. Had my parents been infomed of the sex abuse, they would have taken much different actions.
I began to wake up when my primary abuser- the clergyman at my church, died last year. It sent me into a spiral, and that was when I discovered Ginger, and Wes, and the entire thing. I went to the first conference in Bethesda, and then had a breakdown, and hav since done a great deal of work.
It was very difficult to bring my parents around, but they have started to understand the true nature of the cult.
It is my opinion that the program was primarily a political tool for Mr. Sembler and his totalist right wing agenda, and that all the rest was, as they said in Synanon- HOOPLA.
James
Anonymous:
When I withdrew the first time, in the spring of 1984, right after I made it to second phase and was set back ...I left the building after my exit conference with Ann C and my parents, they sent me out onto austell road with no money, no clothes, no resources at all, in fact they really didn't want to give me my ID back, but my parents insisted.
I walked down Delk Road all the way to I75, as I have posted elsewhere I remember seeing phasers drive by later that night, and they honked at me.
At any rate I walked over to an apartment, right at Delk and 75, the guy who I had lived with for a short time was named Jim, his mother was a single parent, and he was in his 20's. They had withdrawn from the program a couple of months prior to that, must have been in January 84 when they withdrew.
Does anyone recall his last name? What were the apartments called? They literally looked out onto 75.
They let me stay there one night, gave me a cigarette, and then I walked all the way to downtown Atlanta and ended up living in the Salvation Army Youth Shelter for a few months before I broke down adn came back to the cult begging to be readmitted to hell.
I had totally forgotten Charles Clontz that was a real flashback.
James
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