CEDU- propheets

[Anonymous]

hello :wink:

i have been searching all night, but have not come across much information.

i finally emerged from the cedu think tank when i graduated from boulder creek acadamy in '97. (also had the priveledge of a few stays at ascent and ibhi). unfortunately, over six years later, i still have nightmares in which i vividly relive the sensation of being trapped within an "emotional growth" program.

i came online tonight because i am repeatedly bothered by not only the things that i do remember-- but also those that i cannot.
counselors alsways encouraged us to write all about our propheet experiences immediatly following them- and now i wish i had listened.

i came online searching for info on the propheets and came across this forum...and the words of others who have endured cedu's twisted interpretation of therapy.

if anyone knows of websites or other forums...or just wants to discuss or share memories, please email me---- [email protected]

[shanlea]

Who thought that synanon type therapy and the abuse and confrontation of CEDU would be effective?  When staff members heard all that, didn't it scare them off? Didn't people know you don't teat kids the same with verbal abuse.  The stuff taht kills me is that I never had a rap brrage directed at me that had any basis in truth (no, I'm not in denial.  Staff decided what the truth was and went with it) I was just a deeply insecure, profoundly hearing impaired student who was lonely and violated and sleep deprived and low achiever prior to CEDU.  I wasn't a bad kid or a liar to my folks or a druggie. I neede help building myself up not tearing myself down, being treated like I'm on quarantine.

For me, the staff comments have been particularly helpful for insight and closures.  Are any of you from RS in 1987?

[mikehunt]

On 2004-06-16 23:29:00, shanlea wrote:

"Who thought that synanon type therapy and the abuse and confrontation of CEDU would be effective?  When staff members heard all that, didn't it scare them off? Didn't people know you don't teat kids the same with verbal abuse.  The stuff taht kills me is that I never had a rap brrage directed at me that had any basis in truth (no, I'm not in denial.  Staff decided what the truth was and went with it) I was just a deeply insecure, profoundly hearing impaired student who was lonely and violated and sleep deprived and low achiever prior to CEDU.  I wasn't a bad kid or a liar to my folks or a druggie. I neede help building myself up not tearing myself down, being treated like I'm on quarantine.



For me, the staff comments have been particularly helpful for insight and closures.  Are any of you from RS in 1987?"

that's not fair... i think it is effective for some, however, it is not by any means effective for all (or even most...)
the thing is, cedu would be much more effective if you were able to see the situation from a perspective aside from your own (which i was unable to do until recently.)  the thing is, they have a lot to teach... they just go about it the wrong way because they're incredibly ignorant and the werkers refuse to think for themselves.  even if the skool was built with less-than-noble intentions (this is where i believe the problem lays... therapy is intended to be molded to the individual to help them personally; a standardized approach is not genuine therapy... screaming at a suicidal self-loather about how they're fucking up everything is NOT a good way to help them love themself,) it's still got a lot of important concepts backing it up (e.g.- "little girl": children personify innocence... they are divine beings until they are programmed to be otherwise (remember the chrome ball metaphor?)  being able to embrace your "little girl" basically means to be rid of your social programming, which is a fabulous concept in itself.  now, why cedu would want you to be rid of your social programming... well, that's a WHOLE other issue; that's where motives step into play, and that's where my problem begins.)

[CEDU IS A CULT]

who needs regular piss tests more than a former blowski who has his finger on the button?
--Chuck Beyer

[CEDU IS A CULT]

This is naive.  Here's something to keep in mind when deciding their motives.  $5900 per month plus profeet, haircuts, store, etc charges  X 100 students =over $590,000 per month.  That's over
$7,080,000 per year and they use the students to do the dishes, landscape, build rock walls, work the farm, chop wood, Saturday maintenance crews, etc.  I mean it's fucking brilliant.  By the way how the hell can $5900 dollars a month be justified!!  Face it our parents were fucking idiots!!

Karate is a form of martial arts in which people who have had years and years of training can, using only their hands and feet, make  some of the worst movies in the history of the world.
-- Dave Barry

[mikehunt]

what's naive?

[shanlea]

What's not fair?  

I realy feel CEDU was verbally and emotionally abusive as well as dishonest to the families. This was nurtured through the program.  If you had no big dirt you had better come up with something.  That whole "little girl" stuck in an oven did not ring any bells for me because the staff didn't give a crap about the state of my inner child.  Also, when I am taking accountablity and working on something, as an individual, I just like straight talk not cedu terms and bs.  My "inner child" was too busy freaking over those freaks to be worth mentioning.

[mikehunt]

On 2004-06-17 21:38:00, shanlea wrote:

"What's not fair?  



I realy feel CEDU was verbally and emotionally abusive as well as dishonest to the families. This was nurtured through the program.  If you had no big dirt you had better come up with something.  That whole "little girl" stuck in an oven did not ring any bells for me because the staff didn't give a crap about the state of my inner child.  Also, when I am taking accountablity and working on something, as an individual, I just like straight talk not cedu terms and bs.  My "inner child" was too busy freaking over those freaks to be worth mentioning. "

it's not fair to say that cedu was completely ineffective for everyone; cedu, indirectly, helped mold me into the militant fuck i am today... i might have never had to tap into my power like i did, had it not been for cedu (and my need to rebel as a survival instinct)
like i said, cedu might not have had honest motives, but that shouldn't take the value out of their werds (altho, for many, it does... the whole "little girl" concept is now anchored for you by the hate with which it was given to you.  in straight terms: return to the state of innocence you once possessed; be carefree, worryfree, just free in general.  live your life spontaneously [don't worry about what others are thinking of you and want you to do, it's not as important as your true essence being fully present in every present moment.])  you must be able to see past their bullshit and shed light on what you can in order to benefit from such an experience (otherwise, you're just wallowing in your misery of what a horrible experience it was.. every horrible experience has an equal positive charge (remember the pendulum?) which one you experience just depends on your focus; if you're too busy focusing on the horrors, you'll miss out on the valuable lessons, which were, in the end, much more valuable than your sad stories, don't you think?)  a lot of cedu's little kitch-phrases were very powerful; a lot of the concepts they based their program on were very useful.  the thing is, they messed up in execution because their heads and hearts were in the wrong places.  
forget them as people... forget their methods of teaching you this stuff; in all honesty, they were awful teachers.  but think of it like this: have you ever taken an academic class on a subject which you really enjoyed, but the teacher just pissed you off so badly and kind of crapped on your interest in the subject?  maybe the teacher didn't even crap on your ineterest; maybe you just realized that the teacher wasn't doing your subject justice.  it's not the subject's fault that the teacher was no good... thus, there's no need to stop studying history because you've had one awful teacher. (this is why i dropped out of skool... i can teach myself better than any academically trained teacher can teach me; i know how i function.)

_________________
laura solomon
cedu vet. 1996-1999
RIP[ This Message was edited by: mikehunt on 2004-06-18 09:07 ]

[CEDU IS A CULT]

What I find disturbing is that during cop out sessions, many kids admitted to molesting children.
By law this should have been reported!!  
Mikehunt, you keep trying to look at the positive benefits of CEDU.  That is so rebellious to be able to find those benefits after leaving.  Myself? There were no redeemable qualities.  There is no little kid.  I think many on this site are still a little brainwashed.  It was all just a bullshit fantasy.  Just a bad dream.  Can someone really look you in the eye, admit to fucking their neighbor's horse and then you tell them you accept them?  Give me a break, I think it's just plain sick.  Tim Brace even admitted to being a homosexual in a straight marriage.  All I could think is get away from me you faggot.

Great spirits have always encountered violent opposition from mediocre minds.
-- Albert Einstein

[mikehunt]

On 2004-06-18 13:41:00, Bryan Felsher wrote:

"What I find disturbing is that during cop out sessions, many kids admitted to molesting children.

By law this should have been reported!!

molesting kids at the skool or at home?  

Mikehunt, you keep trying to look at the positive benefits of CEDU.  That is so rebellious to be able to find those benefits after leaving.  Myself? There were no redeemable qualities.  There is no little kid.  I think many on this site are still a little brainwashed.  It was all just a bullshit fantasy.  Just a bad dream.  

so, you think i'm brainwashed... i guess that's cool.. you're entitled to your opinions, but i hope you don't think they're absolutely correct; you don't know me, your opinions about me are based on your reflections of yourself and, inevitably, your ignorance (when it comes to your knowledge about me as a person.)
i've taken on my elements of brainwashing... the little bit that did seep in was a strong inclination to be confrontational and abrasive (a survival tactic... you get eaten alive if you cannot defend yourself)  i have, however, spotted this, recognized its nature, and i fight it constantly (now, the inclination is diminishing.)
if i'm brainwashed, i don't know what kinda brainwashing cedu did... it must've been them programming themselves for self-destruction or something, because i'm dedicated to shutting them (and others like them) down.
it seems like you're so set on rebelling against this brainwashing that you get caught up in negativity.  any positivity, you associate with this conception you have of being brainwashed.  that sucks... i refuse to let something like cedu smut up and ruin my outlook on life.  i refuse to hold my reflections on cedu to a different standard than those to which i hold my other reflections... EVERY situation has its up side and down side; cedu taught me tons about human nature and "social engineering".  cedu made my life miserable for years, and out of that misery came something fabulous: me, the strong willed woman who's not afraid to go against the grain and defy the norms.

Can someone really look you in the eye, admit to fucking their neighbor's horse and then you tell them you accept them?  Give me a break, I think it's just plain sick.  Tim Brace even admitted to being a homosexual in a straight marriage.  All I could think is get away from me you faggot.

Great spirits have always encountered violent opposition from mediocre minds.
-- Albert Einstein

"

ever heard of this thing called "forgiveness"?  everybody does things in their lifetime that they're not too proud of..  i believe very strongly that everybody in the werld has done at least one thing that would make at least one other person scowl.  it's not so important what you've done in the past as it is where you are now relatively.  what if, one day, someone you loved with all your heart disclosed something like this (having fucked their neighbors horse) to you?  you know in your heart that it was a disclosure that brought them tremendous pain (in thinking that you would reject them) and thus, it took an even more tremendous amount of courage to tell you... you never could've imagined that they would've done something like this because of the amount of growth between that time and the present.  now, would you tell this loved one that they're a "sick fuck" and that you could no longer love them?  if that's the case, i sure hope you'll allow yourself to open up your heart some more.

(that quote under your post is one of my favorites...)

chances are, you'll prolly disregard all of this by claiming that i'm a "brainwashed fool".  let me give you another reason:  I'M JUST A NASTY FUCKING DYKE.  


_________________
laura solomon
cedu vet. 1996-1999
RIP[ This Message was edited by: mikehunt on 2004-06-18 15:47 ]

[Anonymous]

They never did anything by the book - They were abusing kids themselves - Why would they report abuse?
I waa a therapist there and I reported the abuse directly to child protective services. I was nieve. i tyhought the state really cared. After going to the attorney general and the govenor I realized that there is no state proterction - just state paid workers who take our tax dollars to pretend they have a function when actually all they do is collude to take federal grants.

I'm now a converted libritarian who wants to eradicate government

[Anonymous]

CEDU wouldn't report kids being molested by family members because that would be like biting the hand that feeds them.

[mikehunt]

On 2004-06-18 18:05:00, Anonymous wrote:

"CEDU wouldn't report kids being molested by family members because that would be like biting the hand that feeds them."

true dat... my mom told me that they said something to her along the lines of "don't believe what your kids say about us because we don't believe what they say about you."  that line of manipulation fits best into this scenario.

[Anonymous]

Did your Mom ever figure out CEDU for what it was?

[mikehunt]

On 2004-06-18 22:12:00, Anonymous wrote:

"Did your Mom ever figure out CEDU for what it was?"

not until i told her about the research i've been doing recently on cedu and other synanon based skools... i think it was my drive to make a change that made her realize that there really was something wrong.. i'm so glad that she's finally starting to believe me...
this is because i'm at a much more rational point in my life than i was right after i got out.  the fact that my story hasn't changed over the past 7 years although my mentality has changed drastically probably had a lot to do with the iradication of the communication barrier between my mother and i... she respects my mentality much more than she used to, due to massive amounts of growth, and i'm now much more credible and trustworthy (especially when it comes to reflecting on the intense moments of my past that have the potential to twist my perception of reality into a false dramatization.)

_________________
laura solomon
cedu vet. 1996-1999
RIP[ This Message was edited by: mikehunt on 2004-06-19 00:04 ]