http://www.theglobeandmail.com/life/the ... /comments/Comments from above article:
spinal stenosis
12:26 PM on November 18, 2011
This comment is hidden because you have chosen to ignore spinal stenosis. Show DetailsHide Details
Gone are the days when children should be locked up out of sight. As a community we need to support this type of approach, if it is effective. We must realise that it is a very small percentage of kids who end up with this kind of troubled and criminal background. A child needs more than anything else, compassion from their parents. If they are not in a position to provide it, they need help also, from therapists. The majority of kids who are institutionalised have stormy family lives, either because of their behaviour or because of their parent's behaviours. We need to look at programs like this. I know, I worked with troubled youth for years before this model of sending therapists into the home became known. We worked in a vacuum. the kids would go home on weekends and come back to us a mess of emotions. they would go from the structure of the group home setting to chaos at home with parents unable to cope or change. The social workers had workloads of up to 50 people. We need to look at how we structure our costs in institutional care and this one seems to save money for the social network as well.
0 replies1 reply 0 replies1 reply Please wait while we perform your request.
Abuse Reported Report Abuse
Score: 3
Name withheld
HeidiPG
12:36 PM on November 18, 2011
This comment is hidden because you have chosen to ignore HeidiPG. Show DetailsHide Details
I am a parent of a teen with mental health problems. He has been in treatment for 3 years and has made great progress in learning to control his anxiety and depression with the help of psychiatric medications, intensive counseling and a caring school structure. In addition we have participated in family counseling every two weeks for the last year and have learned a great deal about our family history and the dynamics this history brings to our relationship with our child.
We are currently completing a parenting course based on a book "Parenting from the inside out" by Dan Seibel which has been very helpful in improving our awareness of how we can affect our son's mental health, and together we are making great strides.
If we hadn't been willing to participate in the process, our son's progress would not have been as good. Now he is finishing his grade 12 year, achieving high marks and has set goals for his post-secondary plans.
The hardest part of the process was getting into the system for help at the beginning, due to the lack of funding for access to mental health services. We waited 8 months for an assessment, then another 5 months to see a Psychiatrist for a diagnosis and treatment plan. Once we were in, things progress, but while we were waiting, he had slipped so badly he lost a school year and was thinking about suicide.
I am so glad we got help and our son has survived his teen years. We couldn't have done it alone, and indeed we have repaired our relationship considerably through our participation in the process.
1 replies1 reply 1 replies1 reply Please wait while we perform your request.
Abuse Reported Report Abuse
Score: 3
Name withheld
cdVictoria
12:16 PM on November 18, 2011
This comment is hidden because you have chosen to ignore cdVictoria. Show DetailsHide Details
Another factor not mentioned in this article is the severe shortage of adolescent mental health services across the the country. Many kids are undiagnosed, misdiagnosed or diagnosed but on a wait-list for psychiatric help. Bipolar disorder and other mental illnesses are not caused by poor parenting.
1 replies1 reply 1 replies1 reply Please wait while we perform your request.
Abuse Reported Report Abuse
Score: 1
Name withheld
CLM1
3:17 PM on November 19, 2011
This comment is hidden because you have chosen to ignore CLM1. Show DetailsHide Details
A lot of posters are pretty unforgiving. The article isn't about blaming parents. Whether the parents did or did not contribute to the mental illness or delinquency of their child (and loving, stable families can 'produce' troubled kids) isn't the point. The family probably needs help to help their child and some strategies.
I have to wonder about those who blame permissive parenting, a school system that doesn't 'fail' kids, etc. What do you think happened in past times? Kids who failed school somehow learned their lesson, straightened up and flew right, and suddenly passed? Or dropped out and got menial jobs that no longer exist?
Whether it's nature or nurture that created the problem, we all have to live with the consequences of troubled teens. Heidi and her family deserve kudos for the support of their son, who is now on his way to being a contributing member of society, which is what every parent wants for their kid.
1 replies1 reply 1 replies1 reply Please wait while we perform your request.
Abuse Reported Report Abuse
Score: -1
Name withheld
cyan blue
11:52 AM on November 18, 2011
This comment is hidden because you have chosen to ignore cyan blue. Show DetailsHide Details
Finally, Canada may be turning a corner here. It is about time, given the vast number of people whose lives have been harmed from, and numbers of repeated cycles of, poor parenting. Most of this harm happens by the time the kid is seven. If they have not learned the meaning and significance of a consistent "no", if they have not experienced delayed gratification, if they have not learned to take some risks and acquire some skills by themselves that boost their self-esteem - and all this in an environment of love, then sadly they are set up for failure.
For the sake of kids we need to view parenting as a responsibility, not just a "right". Kids don't fail grade two, kids don't fail BMI assessments, kids don't fail behavioral tests - parents do. Except for the one-in-a-million child-variant, it really is not rocket science.
0 replies1 reply 0 replies1 reply Please wait while we perform your request.
Abuse Reported Report Abuse
Score: -2
Name withheld
starla8383
11:30 AM on November 18, 2011
This comment is hidden because you have chosen to ignore starla8383. Show DetailsHide Details
Children are a product of their upbringing and environment. A teenager doesn't become troubled in a vacuum. Blaming the trouble on the child alone won't get the heart of the issues, and will likely breed resentment. Parents can't mess up their kids and then bring them to someone else to be fixed.
I'm Not an Alberta Redneck
12:31 PM on November 18, 2011
This comment is hidden because you have chosen to ignore I'm Not an Alberta Redneck. Show DetailsHide Details
It is primarily the environment, specifically peer pressure. By creating a school system where everyone "succeeds" those who learn this the soonest and act on it, become the leaders and soon are enticing others into this disruptive and ultimately dysfunctional lifestyle choice. (to often put it mildly)
We need schools where such troublemakers are not allowed to prowl the halls, recruiting new members of their gangs.
Abuse Reported Report Abuse
Score: 1
Name withheld
johnnynorth
1:57 PM on November 18, 2011
This comment is hidden because you have chosen to ignore johnnynorth. Show DetailsHide Details
"Parents can't mess up their kids and then bring them to someone else to be fixed."
If they have messed up their kids, then they do need outside assistance. The assistance should not just be for the kids, but also guide the parents.
Abuse Reported Report Abuse
Score: 3
Name withheld
toronto2vancouver
3:01 PM on November 18, 2011
This comment is hidden because you have chosen to ignore toronto2vancouver. Show DetailsHide Details
I'm not sure why this comment has a negative score, you are actually on target for a lot of it. Some therapies focus exclusively on parent training for teens and are very successful. It's typically a combination of genes and environment that leads to psychopathology
Abuse Reported Report Abuse
Score: 1
Name withheld
BH1
3:55 PM on November 18, 2011
This comment is hidden because you have chosen to ignore BH1. Show DetailsHide Details
I think part of the negative response is due to the implied idea that all children's problems are a direct result of bad things their parents did. I don't think that's what this article or therapeutic approach is intending to say. It's just that families must be part of the solution -- _regardless_ of whether or not they literally 'messed up their kids'. To rephrase what you said, people can't heal in a vacuum.
Of course, troubled kids very often do come from troubled families, that's fair enough. But sometimes there's more to it than that. We're born with individual personalities and have a lot of influences and experiences besides our parents, parents may mean well and have the skills to handle one child but not a different or more difficult one, and that doesn't even start to address the issues of kids who've moved from home to home.
I think part of the point is that the best results come when everyone who is spending a lot of time with the 'patient' knows what to do to help them best.