Which two programs are you "locked and loaded with" and how did you arrive at that selection of those?
One is a wilderness program in Utah, but we've already ruled that one out. I am convinced these short and medium term programs have the potential to backfire, and I am particularly suspicious of any program in the state of Utah. The fact so many are clustered there is a big red flag - exactly what does the state allow that others do not?
The other is a boarding school in a different state. My selection was based on many hours of research (which is how I found this site).
One question in my mind is whether *all* of these programs are evil, or whether the sentiment in this forum is biased by the worst offenders (e.g. boot camps). Clearly there are people who have demonstrated closed-mindedness here, i.e. those who have concluded I am Whooter. If nobody new is allowed to post here without being harassed, maybe you should just close the site to new subscribers and have a circle jerk with those who share your opinions.
The boarding school has a facebook page and some of the graduates have posted positive comments about their experiences. Of course I have no way to verify that these are actual students, but they sure look real. I have not ruled out this option yet, but we have put it on hold. We're going to take the advise of BuzzKill and others, give therapy a try (even if our daughter will not participate) and try to learn some new strategies and coping skills. (Still think I'm Whooter?)