I remember spending 2 Christmas' in Straight. The thought about this topic came up last night while I helped my daughter put up a Christmas tree and decorate the front of the house.
Both of the Christmas' that I spent in Straight were not happy as I was away from my family. Sure my host parents were nice people, but they were not able to fulfill the viod in my life, which was the need to be with my family to have Christmas dinner, be part of looking for the christmas tree, decorating, and mainly be a part of the family.
From being in a program during the holidays especially it caused me to have a barrier that still exist in my life. I am not an anti-social person, but this time of year always triggers feelings and emotions for me. I have had people tell me to get over it and move on, but they do not understand how deeply this type of situation effects a person.
My first Christmas after I got out of the program I tried to do the family thing and it was ruined for me. Feelings of resentment for having been placed in the program dominated what should have been a happy thing. It seems that no matter how I try to get into the holiday spirit the program seems to have ruined it for me. I do however put on a plastic smile and act as if, but I know it is not real.
"Relate"
I can't help but feel the same way too, I think programs do cause allot of future damage emotionally and no matter how hard we try and suppress it,the feeling always surface. I sure don't have any answers on how to make the bad feeling go away,or how to overcome them.
I tend to close my eye's, so to speak, and move on,They say what doesn't kill us makes us stronger, and I try to believe that.But it is still a hard time to get threw.
Hey man this should be on the main page not burried here om OFFA.
I think none-ya should take a good look at the thread (OFFA) and relies that most of the posters here have allot of pent up emotions from programs, and probably and do need the, acknowledgement that yes those bad times did effect allot of people not just some of us, me included. And that not 1, but allot of us go threw the same depressions and emotional obstacle threw out the year.
If none-ya was to pay attention,( OFFA ) is probable the most view thread on the site.
Quick numbers for, Elan discussion from New Forum Policies
17 Jan 2010, 13:51
11 months = 26,432,views and 2045 post. Thats 2203 views per month,551 per week and 79 per day,
11 months = 2045 posts,thats 171 per month 43 per week.
That's more action than any thread on the forum, So yes this thread needs love and some consoling,to possibly break up all the hostility.Sorry if this thread is too hot for some, but thats what programs do to people and the real world isn't much different.Survivors need a vent hole,.
The ones who truly get fired on are Ex-Staff, but some don't seem to follow that,If the staff, were so wonderful in the programs, No one would have had a bad experience, now would they.?? Just food for thought.
We all have our depressions and horrible thoughts from the past,So don't minimize the people on (OFFA),
For the most part programs turned out more hostile people than not ,. :cheers: :cheers: :cheers: :peace: :peace: :rocker: :rocker: