Treatment Abuse, Behavior Modification, Thought Reform > News Items

Katies Story

<< < (10/22) > >>

FemanonFatal2.0:

--- Quote from: "Guest" ---
--- Quote from: "Guest" ---
--- Quote from: "psy" ---Out of respect for Katie, perhaps we can wait stay on-topic...  Just a kind request.
--- End quote ---


Katie, I really recommend joining the lawsuit to help with your independence, something you should be further along with now—and would have been had you not been incarcerated and tortured/brainwashed throughout your entire adolescence—I can promise you, justice  is the best cure for depression and ptsd!
--- End quote ---
http://www.turleylaw.com/
--- End quote ---

The Turley suit is not taking new plaintiffs at this time.

But guys, lets remember that she is just now coming to terms with her stay in Cross Creek, she has mentioned to me that she doesn't think she was abused, yet she also said that she had been restrained and isolated, so I think she has a way to go before she understands the gravity of the "treatment" she received in CCM. I think we should let her get to that point in the story before we suggest lawsuits, at this point I would be more inclined to suggest that her parents were even more psychologically abusive then the program was. In fact, from what I gather, and as sad as this sounds she might have been happier at CCM than she was/is at home.

try another castle:

--- Quote ---It’s interesting that Castle mentioned being brainwashed into idolizing his dad.
--- End quote ---

I should, perhaps, elaborate on that.

The seeds had already been sown when they separated. People now are more knowledgeable in terms of how to create a healthy dynamic between the parent who has custody and the one who does not. But in the 70s, that was not the case.

My mother had custody. As such, when my father had visitation, every time was "fun time". Junk food, staying up late, toys, chuck e cheese and water slides. If you see your kids every other week, you want to make the most of it, you know? My dad's mid-life crisis/bachelor lifestyle, with the porsche and the boat and the good looking girlfriends didnt help, either. All of this easily sets up a "good guy/bad guy" situation. My mom was the disciplinarian, she had to deal with my drek every day, whereas I normally only got one or two star-studded backhands from my father during the weekends, which were quickly forgiven, since I was so happy to see him. (And no, he is not a child abuser. 70s parents did things differently. You mouthed off, the riposte was the hand of dad, and I have always had an extremely foul, vulgar mouth. Doesn't mean its right, though.) It paled in comparison to the whippings and thrown objects from my mother. It never occurred to me that if I were living with my dad, things would have been just as explosive.

It is known now that parents with visitation have to have down time with their kids as well, to prevent this lopsided perception issue.

All my mother heard from me was how badly I wanted to live with him. Every time I came  back from a visit, I'd be in tears. This certainly didn't help her emotionally. She was the one who had to take care of me, clean up after me, discipline me, go to the parent teacher meetings, get a job a substitute teacher so she could support my sister and I, while the old man walked out, didn't pay much child support (especially for a kid with as many medical problems as I), and basically embraced the lifestyle of a recent college grad. Trust me when I say that many times she wished I COULD go live with my father, and she said so often, at about 90 decibels.

CEDU exploited that. They oversimplified the situation. Never addressed the overall issue, never put it in its proper context. (ESPECIALLY never talked about how the relationship became primarily materialistic, and was initiated by the parent.) Not only that, they also encouraged demonizing my mother, who certainly didnt deserve that. They exacerbated the already slanted perception. So he was the one I cried about every time they played "I need you" or "what about me?" in propheets (ugh), this despite the fact that after finally living with my father full-time before I was placed, I couldn't stand him, and he and my stepmother kept their bedroom door locked at night because they thought I was going to kill them. (which was ignorant and paranoid on their part. So I was into wicca, big whoop-de-doo.)

However, coming out of the place, everything was suddenly hunky dory, even though NOTHING in our relationship had been resolved. Especially since any parental issues kids work with at the place is done in isolation, and not with the parent. As such, the honeymoon had the half-life of a mayfly.

The sad thing is, the thought of seeing him as my hero today makes me cringe, and to this day, even though I remember clearly my crying fits after visits when I was a child, I honestly can't comprehend why I felt that way. I was made to scream about it so much at CEDU, that whatever true sorrow I felt about the divorce was run through a grinder and rendered into dust. The issue was never really addressed, it was simply killed, and true perspective was never achieved. I was made to regard it as if I were five years old again.

My connection with my parents was effectively severed. It took me years to rebuild one with my mother. I dont know if it will ever happen with my dad.

My friend and fellow alum S experienced the exact same thing. We pretty much freaked each other out when we had a conversation about it as adults. The similarities were uncanny.

Which is why I staunchly maintain that programs do not help families. They destroy them. No matter how much gets patched up afterwards, over a period of years, it will never ever be the same again.

Programs constantly encourage and facilitate regression in their "therapeutic" practices. As a result, it makes it impossible for the kid to relate to their parents as an adult when they get out. You basically pick up where you left off before you went into the clink, with about ten trunks more baggage.




--- Quote ---I think we should let her get to that point in the story before we suggest lawsuits,
--- End quote ---

Agreed. Now is the time for decompression and debriefing between her and her folks, on whatever level that may be.


Hopefully it will work out better than it did for some of us. All I can really offer is my perspective, so I hope it can help.

Anonymous:

--- Quote from: "FemanonFatal2.0" ---In fact, from what I gather, and as sad as this sounds she might have been happier at CCM than she was/is at home.
--- End quote ---

You win the prize for stupid.

Anonymous:

--- Quote from: "FemanonFatal2.0" ---
--- Quote from: "Guest" ---
--- Quote from: "Guest" ---
--- Quote from: "psy" ---Out of respect for Katie, perhaps we can wait stay on-topic...  Just a kind request.
--- End quote ---


Katie, I really recommend joining the lawsuit to help with your independence, something you should be further along with now—and would have been had you not been incarcerated and tortured/brainwashed throughout your entire adolescence—I can promise you, justice  is the best cure for depression and ptsd!
--- End quote ---
http://www.turleylaw.com/
--- End quote ---

The Turley suit is not taking new plaintiffs at this time.

But guys, lets remember that she is just now coming to terms with her stay in Cross Creek, she has mentioned to me that she doesn't think she was abused, yet she also said that she had been restrained and isolated, so I think she has a way to go before she understands the gravity of the "treatment" she received in CCM. I think we should let her get to that point in the story before we suggest lawsuits, at this point I would be more inclined to suggest that her parents were even more psychologically abusive then the program was. In fact, from what I gather, and as sad as this sounds she might have been happier at CCM than she was/is at home.
--- End quote ---

Kaite, contact these people anyway. Lawsuits against the people who tortured you, heal. Criminal charges are  even better, if you can get the feds to help you
there is no healing without justice, imo

FemanonFatal2.0:

--- Quote from: "try another castle" ---Programs constantly encourage and facilitate regression in their "therapeutic" practices. As a result, it makes it impossible for the kid to relate to their parents as an adult when they get out. You basically pick up where you left off before you went into the clink, with about ten trunks more baggage.

--- End quote ---

Thank you for that Castle, I really enjoy reading your posts.  :notworthy:

I think the same is true for WWASP as well... We were taught to accept that our parents were always right, and perfect (well the ones paying the paycheck that is) and anything we had to say about how they acted was automatically turned around to point out some kind of problem we had that justified their actions. I never understood it, yet I saw it time and again and not just from staff but the upper levels and other kids too... that was simply part of the doctrine there "obey thy mother and father, they can do no wrong". I can remember one time in particular there was this 14 year old girl who was such an amazing person to be around, she had a great sense of humor and a quick wit, you might say she had an attractive personality. Her problem was with "partying" apparently she drank and smoked weed but you could really consider that normal teenage stuff, she kept up her grades and rarely got into any trouble. Her mom however was a mentally unstable, abusive, drug store addict/ alcoholic and this girl told us of some really fucked up shit that her mom did to her and her dad (who moved to a different city just to escape her mother). Yet, for some reason people always gave her feed back that she was somehow taking advantage of her mothers illness in order to use drugs (only weed mind you), or that she was the one driving her mother crazy. There were more than a few times I would just laugh out loud at the ridiculous concepts the program tried to force on us, i feel sorry for those that came to believe it but I just don't see the logic in that. Our parents are human too and they also happen to be half of the goddamn problem.

I really think programs are designed to be the child repair factory for parents, not actually help the kids. That's why when it came time for the kids to come home all we knew is the program jargon and not how to maintain a healthy lifestyle. This really got in the way of relating to our parents as anything else besides the authoritarian despite the fact that we were of the age that we were supposed to be making our own decisions, and the parent child relationship would be dissolving. I think it was hardest for me to talk to my mom when I got home, because instead of confiding in her, I was always afraid that she would punish me or more namely that she would send me back to the program. Trust with my mom wasn't established until well into my young adult years, after I had moved out and wasn't under the threat of her parental wrath. Now, as that fear of her authority wore off, we get along much much better.

Navigation

[0] Message Index

[#] Next page

[*] Previous page