Treatment Abuse, Behavior Modification, Thought Reform > Hyde Schools
Re: HAPA
Ursus:
Comments left for the above article, "Naked Men: The ManKind Project and Michael Scinto" (by Chris Vogel, Oct 4 2007, Houston Press), #s 21-40:
Mark Jones · 10/08/2007 9:52:33 AM
I am very sorry for the man's family. At the same time, it is truly unfortunate and irresponsible to blame the Warriors for this man's death. Obviously, he was a very troubled man--and the Warriors failed to save him from his demons. This is not to say it is the Warriors' fault that he is dead. I suppose one could go back over the past few months and find many people and experiences that adversely affected him. Are we to sue all of them for his death?Mark Jones · 10/08/2007 10:02:00 AM
I was greatly disappointed by this article. The writer's sensationalist treatment of the rituals show exactly why they are secret. Taken out of context, they seem bizarre, cultish, and even nutty. In their proper context, they are part of a deeply moving and meaningful experience.Susan Dancy · 10/08/2007 11:26:36 AM
My heartfelt sympathy and condolences to the family and friends of Michael Scinto. I know many men who have participated in the MKP weekend and, for them, it has been a life-affirming experience. Although I agree with some of the concerns raised in Mr. Vogel's, I found the majority of the comments biased, exagerated and ignorant of the reality of the process. The men I know who are involved with MKP are not perfect. But they are sincere. It is not a cult. It is a community.Susan Dancy · 10/08/2007 12:42:09 PM
"Michael Scinto was literally scared to death." Yellow journalism at its worst. Shame on you, Houston Press.Susan Dancy · 10/08/2007 12:42:11 PM
"Michael Scinto was literally scared to death." Yellow journalism at its worst. Shame on you, Houston Press.anonymous · 10/08/2007 6:55:04 PM
Too much opportunity for blackmail. Either overt or covert.Derrick & Shelley · 10/08/2007 8:24:21 PM
After reading this article we strrongly believe that this group should be under further investigation. They are preying upon young men who have emotional and physical problems. They are going after easy targets,the ones who are despertly seeking help. Unfortunely a life was lost for this story to be made published. Justice will be served.Frances · 10/08/2007 10:41:08 PM
Despite the outcries in the comments, I found this article to be a balanced and focused look at a troubling event. Perhaps not all MKP events are like what Michael Scinto experienced, but even the smallest amount of oversight of the events could have prevented his death and gone a long way toward reassuring the public that the majority of MKP events are not as traumatic. Mr. Vogel's article revealed what can occur when organizations are permitted to operate in the dark, using secrecy, fear, and intimidation to reduce the conversation to whispers. Thank you Mr. Vogel for opening the door.Derek Dujardin · 10/09/2007 8:58:14 AM
This "Mary" has never been to a weekend and therefore has very distorted view of it. I can't believe the Houston Press would run one-source story. For the vast majority of the men who go through the weekend, it's quite thearputic. The fact that her son is off drugs is something she should be grateful for and she doesn't seem to want to give any credit to this fact that perhaps the weekend worked for him. I've been to one weekend and have staffed another. The weekend is not intended to make your comfortable. It's intended to push you to make a breakthrough, and breakthroughs are never comfortable, change is never comfortable. The comment about guys grabbing each other's dicks in the sweat lodge is an absolute fabrication. Trust me, if that kind of shit was happening every weekend, to over 4000 men around the world, do you really think men would invite other men to such a weekend? Do you think this organization would be around for 23 years? Use your head.ABC · 10/09/2007 9:58:23 AM
So, you folks who are so impressed with this fellow's research ... Why didn't he discover that Scott Cole hasn't been executive director for nearly two years? Why didn't he discover that Mel Taylor isn't merely a member, but is chairman of the board of the Mankind Project, Houston? These seem to be basic facts. He missed them.Joey Johansen · 10/09/2007 8:43:19 PM
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ Derrick & Shelley wrote on October 8, 2007 @ 08:24PM: After reading this article we strrongly believe that this group should be under further investigation. They are preying upon young men who have emotional and physical problems. They are going after easy targets,the ones who are despertly seeking help. Unfortunely a life was lost for this story to be made published. Justice will be served. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ If you base your assumptions and judgments on one source of information, which several readers found to be quite biased, do you really believe you are on solid footing? Two "facts" in your comment are disputable: 1) The average age of MKP members is probably about 40, so it's a bit of a stretch to say that the organization "preys on young men." (Although I'm sure many of them would be flattered to be called young!) 2) None of the men who I know in MKP (six of them) had "emotional and physical problems" prior to participating in the MKP weekend--at least no more than any other average human being! You make it sound as if MKP members are lurking around homeless shelters, mental health facilities, and rehabs trying to recruit members! In addition, it is my understanding that many MKP members who are also recovering addicts/alcoholics recommend that a man have at least one year of sobriety/clean time before participating in the MKP weekend. Of course, a year of sobriety is no guarantee, as was unfortunately the case with Mr. Scinto, but it does suggest that MKP does *not* seek to exploit a man's vulnerability. They aren't stupid; they realize that if they accepted a bunch of guys with severe mental illness that they would open themselves up for criticism and lawsuits. That's why they screen applicants. As I said earlier, maybe they need to modify the screening procedure--I don't know--but to assume that they are exploiting men is way off base. However, I can see how you got that impression from Mr. Vogel's sensationalized, one-sided article.Joey Johansen · 10/09/2007 9:17:48 PM
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Frances wrote on October 8, 2007 @ 10:41PM: Despite the outcries in the comments, I found this article to be a balanced and focused look at a troubling event. Perhaps not all MKP events are like what Michael Scinto experienced, but even the smallest amount of oversight of the events could have prevented his death and gone a long way toward reassuring the public that the majority of MKP events are not as traumatic. Mr. Vogel's article revealed what can occur when organizations are permitted to operate in the dark, using secrecy, fear, and intimidation to reduce the conversation to whispers. Thank you Mr. Vogel for opening the door. ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- How do you know it was balanced? Have you talked with people who found the article to be very biased, to contain several errors, to have relied heavily on a discredited "cult expert," etc.? You also state, "... even the smallest amount of oversight of the events could have prevented his death ..." How do you know? I don't think you realize how difficult it is to evaluate and accurately predict if a person will commit suicide. The vast majority of people who have suicidal thoughts do not act on them. The vast majority of recovering alcoholics/addicts do not commit suicide. The vast majority of individuals suffering from depression do not commit suicide. It is true that each of those three factors increase the risk of suicide but even if a person possesses all three risk factors the odds are much, much greater that he will *not* commit suicide that that he will kill himself. Another way to look at this issue is if we involuntarily committed every person with suicidal thoughts, alcohol and other drug problems, and/or depression our nation's entire economy would come to a grinding halt because tens of millions of citizens would be locked up on psych wards. Given how difficult it is to evaluate and predict if a person will commit suicide, how can we expect an organization like MKP to determine with 100% accuracy who will and will not commit suicide after attending an MKP weekend? If we were to demand such a predictive accuracy, then shouldn't we expect if of all organizations? For example, shouldn't churches and other houses of worship be required to screen all people who attend their services or become members to determine their suicide risk? Now, I recognize that some of you will object to the comparison by stating that churches don't charge money for their services. That's true to a point, i.e., generally people aren't officially turned away because of a lack of donations. On the other hand, I don't know what your church is like but I don't know many church goers, myself included, who aren't frequently asked for money--from the pulpit, with the collection plate, from the fund raising committee, for the capital campaign, to benefit the scholarship fund, to support the national office, etc. So I'd hardly call churches "free!" Others might object to my comparison claiming that churches aren't a "personal growth organization" like MKP. My reply to that argument would be: "Really?" I thought that personal growth, of which spiritual/religious growth is a big part, was one of the main benefits of church involvement. It is for me and I think is for most sincere church members. (Of course, there are always the "see and be seen" crowd who dress to impress, drum up new business for themselves, pay lip service to the true meaning of their faith, and are non-stop gossips but that's thankfully the minority of religious persons.)Michael · 10/10/2007 10:30:11 AM
I can't believe some of these comments that people are writing. How can they not have sympathy for this Scinto family? This was a very powerful story and hopefully it will save lives rather than destroy them. My heart goes out to the Scintos and I pray for them and wish them the best of luck. Please have faith, believe and do not pay attention to all the rude people, but know that there are people out here who do care. Nice job, Vogel....Susan Dancy · 10/10/2007 10:58:31 AM
"I can't believe some of these comments that people are writing. How can they not have sympathy for this Scinto family? This was a very powerful story and hopefully it will save lives rather than destroy them." _______________________________________________________________________________________ I have sympathy for the Scinto family and am greatly saddened by the terrible emotional pain they have been through. My comment is that the MKP is an organization of men who, for the most part, seek to make postiive changes, not only in their own lives, but in the world. It is not some secretive cult trying to lure unsuspecting and vunerable men into its evil clutches. It is an organization of men supporting other men in personal growth, intergrity and accountability. The process of the weekend is not about secrecy. It is about confidentiality. Maybe after this tragedy and the publicity around it, some of those "secrets" will be revealed. Will it take some of the magic and mystery away from the experience? Probably. Will it diminish the good work these men are doing? I pray not.anonymous · 10/10/2007 2:18:03 PM
I attended a party where most of the men were members of the mkp. I've never seen so many disfunctional men in one place before. They seem to be the ones that don't quite fit into normal society. The mkp is the blind leading the blind. They can be summed up in two words....fruit loops.Anonymous · 10/10/2007 3:51:38 PM
Warriors.... COME OUT AND PLAAAAAYYYYYY! CAAAANNNNN YYYYYOOOOUUUUU DIG IT!!!!!anonymous · 10/10/2007 6:43:50 PM
I find it fascinating that Joey Johansen has nothing better to do than comment on every f%$#ing posting. Get a freakin' life.Bob · 10/10/2007 7:26:06 PM
Chris, I thought I'd also post this here. I hope you don't mind. "Bob" here. I am one of the men Mr.Chris Vogel contacted. I gave him permission to share my experience with MKP and my recovery program. Years ago my wife "Cathy" and I thought we had made friends with another couple in recovery. We all spent time together. Good times and bad. That all went away when I started to express my concerns about that Warrior Weekend. Yes I got information off the internet. But who doesn't these days ? I also got back-up information from human sources. I was told I wasn't ready for the Weekend. It wasn't for me. But I was also told that I had wounds and Shadow Work to do. A lot to do by their count. I was angry but two people I love dearly, my wife and my recovery sponsor made comments to me that snapped me right out of my self-centeredness and help put me back on track with my program. From my wife one day: "Why are you angry ? You're still alive and sober." From my sponsor: "Tradition number 10" It reads " Alcoholics Anonymous has no opinion on outside matters; hence the A.A. name ought never be drawn into public controversy" Our middle son has come back in to his recovery program. Today, he is alive and sober. I can't imagine a child of mine killing themself regardless of the reasons. Our hearts and prayers go out to Michael's family. Warm regards, "Bob"Tim · 10/10/2007 9:59:31 PM
I was not there on the Houston weekend, so I cannot speak for them; however, I can say that of all the men that I know in MKP, they all live their lives from their integrity and are committed to improving their lives and their communities. Experiencing the NWTA was one of the most powerful things I have done in my life. An issue that had plagued me for 13 years was removed that weekend and has allowed me to live an incredibly joy filled life. Is the weekend intense? Yes it is. And it was because it was intense that enabled my healing to happen. Is it perfect? No. Is there anything I would change? Yes. I had a man on my weekend joke about what was going to happen during the next exercise (his statement was not true, and I felt he was just trying to screw with my head). I have read the MKP protocols and they are about creating a safe space so that men feel safe enough to look at the issues that plague their life and I want to challenge any staff men to adhere to them and not to put in their sideways comments that they think are funny, because we never know the effect that those comments will have on another human being. That being said, I would still recommend it to any recovery minded person who has been on his recovery path for at least 2 or 3 years. I would like to add that I do not believe that any one single event would cause a person to commit suicide, that it would take years of feeling that one was in a hopeless situation to come to that point. I would at this point like to say that that does not diminish how his family feels and that my thoughts and prayers are with them through this incredibly trying time.Reversable Goldfish 10/11/2007 12:54:36 AM
I just completed (10/07) the Gateway Weekend of the New Warrior Training, the weekend for mostly gay, bi & questioning men, though hetero men also attend. It was a traumatic weekend for me. The methods of MKP are not for everyone. Yet 26 of the 27 men who attended seemed to have a meaningful powerful weekend. The description of the weekend in the article is basically accurate, though I didn't see or experience everything mentioned. Out of context or not, it paints a general picture that's more accurate than not. I could have left if I wanted and felt no pressure to stay. I wanted to understand what they kept promising would be revealed. I didn't. Oh, and I didn't have my car. During my time of prolonged physical and psychological discomfort, I wondered if I would need therapy to recover from the weekend. Now, safe at home, I don't think I will. I came to the weekend with reasonable skills at knowing my limits, asking for what I want, and setting boundaries. Many men attend these type of events because they don't have these skills. Articles like this are difficult. It focuses on a few bad cases and then talks about a few good cases, like 50% like it and 50% don't, but that's not really the case. The problem is that the container that the MKP creates to do its work can't contain (or perhaps even recognize) the problems when they come up. They aren't set up for the exceptional situation. The MKP could be right for some men. It was not right for me. If it doesn't sound right to you, don't go. There's better stuff out there. I am discouraging most of my friends from going. (As a side note: what's pagan about being in the woods naked? It's like saying Christians like war.)
° ° °
DannyB II:
duplicate
DannyB II:
--- Quote from: "Ursus" ---Sorry, Danny, hadn't meant to drive you over the brink. I was merely pointing out that, despite your claims to the contrary, two mental health professionals HAD indeed been consulted and quoted in Chris Vogel's article re. the merits or demerits of Mankind Project's New Warrior Training Adventure.
Whether or not you or I or anyone else agrees or disagrees with what these two professionals said or even the veracity of their credentials ... is immaterial to your claim, and hence immaterial to my refutation of it.
Those concerns, thoughts, opinions, etc. are certainly up for discussion, however! :D
--- End quote ---
Sorry Chris Vogels, your main man for this article is loosing precious ground.
It would have helped if you, would have done some investigation on your own. I'm thinking???
This gentlemen (Joey Johansen) covers the article pretty well, in my opinion anyway.
Your professionals, have you been able to locate one yet, that even knows "MKP" exists. :)
Joey Johansen · 10/09/2007 8:43:19 PM
Derrick & Shelley wrote:
On October 8, 2007 @ 08:24PM: After reading this article we strrongly believe that this group should be under further investigation. They are preying upon young men who have emotional and physical problems. They are going after easy targets,the ones who are despertly seeking help. Unfortunely a life was lost for this story to be made published. Justice will be served.
Joey Johansen wrote:
If you base your assumptions and judgments on one source of information, which several readers found to be quite biased, do you really believe you are on solid footing? Two "facts" in your comment are disputable: 1) The average age of MKP members is probably about 40, so it's a bit of a stretch to say that the organization "preys on young men." (Although I'm sure many of them would be flattered to be called young!) 2) None of the men who I know in MKP (six of them) had "emotional and physical problems" prior to participating in the MKP weekend--at least no more than any other average human being! You make it sound as if MKP members are lurking around homeless shelters, mental health facilities, and rehabs trying to recruit members! In addition, it is my understanding that many MKP members who are also recovering addicts/alcoholics recommend that a man have at least one year of sobriety/clean time before participating in the MKP weekend. Of course, a year of sobriety is no guarantee, as was unfortunately the case with Mr. Scinto, but it does suggest that MKP does *not* seek to exploit a man's vulnerability. They aren't stupid; they realize that if they accepted a bunch of guys with severe mental illness that they would open themselves up for criticism and lawsuits. That's why they screen applicants. As I said earlier, maybe they need to modify the screening procedure--I don't know--but to assume that they are exploiting men is way off base. However, I can see how you got that impression from Mr. Vogel's sensationalized, one-sided article.
Joey Johansen · 10/09/2007 9:17:48 PM
- Frances wrote:
On October 8, 2007 @ 10:41PM: Despite the outcries in the comments, I found this article to be a balanced and focused look at a troubling event. Perhaps not all MKP events are like what Michael Scinto experienced, but even the smallest amount of oversight of the events could have prevented his death and gone a long way toward reassuring the public that the majority of MKP events are not as traumatic. Mr. Vogel's article revealed what can occur when organizations are permitted to operate in the dark, using secrecy, fear, and intimidation to reduce the conversation to whispers. Thank you Mr. Vogel for opening the door.
Joey Johansen wrote:
How do you know it was balanced? Have you talked with people who found the article to be very biased, to contain several errors, to have relied heavily on a discredited "cult expert," etc.? You also state, "... even the smallest amount of oversight of the events could have prevented his death ..." How do you know? I don't think you realize how difficult it is to evaluate and accurately predict if a person will commit suicide. The vast majority of people who have suicidal thoughts do not act on them. The vast majority of recovering alcoholics/addicts do not commit suicide. The vast majority of individuals suffering from depression do not commit suicide. It is true that each of those three factors increase the risk of suicide but even if a person possesses all three risk factors the odds are much, much greater that he will *not* commit suicide that that he will kill himself. Another way to look at this issue is if we involuntarily committed every person with suicidal thoughts, alcohol and other drug problems, and/or depression our nation's entire economy would come to a grinding halt because tens of millions of citizens would be locked up on psych wards. Given how difficult it is to evaluate and predict if a person will commit suicide, how can we expect an organization like MKP to determine with 100% accuracy who will and will not commit suicide after attending an MKP weekend? If we were to demand such a predictive accuracy, then shouldn't we expect if of all organizations? For example, shouldn't churches and other houses of worship be required to screen all people who attend their services or become members to determine their suicide risk? Now, I recognize that some of you will object to the comparison by stating that churches don't charge money for their services. That's true to a point, i.e., generally people aren't officially turned away because of a lack of donations. On the other hand, I don't know what your church is like but I don't know many church goers, myself included, who aren't frequently asked for money--from the pulpit, with the collection plate, from the fund raising committee, for the capital campaign, to benefit the scholarship fund, to support the national office, etc. So I'd hardly call churches "free!" Others might object to my comparison claiming that churches aren't a "personal growth organization" like MKP. My reply to that argument would be: "Really?" I thought that personal growth, of which spiritual/religious growth is a big part, was one of the main benefits of church involvement. It is for me and I think is for most sincere church members. (Of course, there are always the "see and be seen" crowd who dress to impress, drum up new business for themselves, pay lip service to the true meaning of their faith, and are non-stop gossips but that's thankfully the minority of religious persons.)
Anne Bonney:
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/artic ... z0zQWWIQOx
My (very) weird weekend with the naked woodland warriors who travel to remote England to 'reclaim their masculinity'
By Tom Mitchelson
Last updated at 1:53 AM on 13th March 2010
How our man found himself with 65 naked men chanting, drumming - and screaming their rage against women to 'reclaim' their lost masculinity...
The temperature has plunged to freezing. I am deep in a remote English woodland outside Exeter.
I have been blindfolded and I am standing, holding hands, with a long line of men - who, until about 24 hours ago, I'd never met before.
Together, we are stumbling through the scrub as beating tribal drums guide our way. Oh yes, and we are naked. Totally naked.
Wild man: Tom Mitchelson embraces his inner warrior
Abruptly, my blindfold is ripped off and I see we have been led to a shadowy candle-lit room. There are about 65 of us in a double horseshoe formation.
This is a ceremony where we are to become 'new warriors'. And then the dancing begins.
I wish I were somewhere else. Anywhere else. So why on earth am I here?
I have signed up to the ManKind Project, an all-male group boasting 1,700 UK members that aims to release men's 'inner warrior' and reclaim their masculinity. I am about to graduate from their New Warrior training course.
It was launched in 1985 in the U.S. by a former marine, Rich Tosi, a therapist, Bill Kauth, and a university professor, Ron Hering, under the guise of providing 'educational services'.
They claim to be a not-for-profit company and nearly 40,000 men have attended their courses worldwide.
But things haven't been going well. Five years ago one of their recruits, Michael Scinto, made a complaint to the Madison County Sheriff in Texas that he'd been abused during a traumatic weekend with the project.
He subsequently committed suicide and his relatives filed a wrongful death lawsuit against the ManKind Project, which eventually settled out of court and claimed it would change certain of its practices.
I had also been tipped off by a number of concerned wives - who'd noticed disturbing changes in their husbands' behaviour since attending one of ManKind's UK weekends away.
Tom signed up to the ManKind Project, an all-male group boasting 1,700 UK members that aims to release men's 'inner warrior' and reclaim their masculinity
My aim is to go undercover to find out just how serious these allegations against them are - or whether they're just a bunch of misguided men who need a break from their women.
My first experience of the organisation is not pleasant. After signing up online to attend their initiation weekend, I am sent an intimidating amount of paperwork - including a confidentiality agreement. Of course, they have no idea I'm a journalist, and it's costing me £500 for the privilege.
Everything I read from them is baffling non-speak. They claim the weekend is a 'process of initiation and self-examination that is crucial to the development of a healthy and mature male self'.
They claim they help move men away from the 'comforting embrace' of their mother - something, on the face of it, some wives might even encourage. Then I am told I will 'confront' my 'dependence on women', to help me move into the 'masculine kingdom'.
To be honest, it all sounds absolutely ludicrous. But nothing as ludicrous as what I discover when I arrive at the training centre in the West Country.
As I enter, I am asked to line up with my fellow recruits and we are ordered to 'observe the sacred silence'.
This is all before we've been shown to where we're staying. It's all rather bizarre, as they begin a strange game where I am asked to walk up to a man who stares at me, with black camouflage paint on his face. The process is repeated again, and again.
They claim they help move men away from the 'comforting embrace' of their mother - something, on the face of it, some wives might even encourage
Then I am ordered into a Dutch barn, where yet another confidentiality agreement is thrust in front of me, forbidding me to mention anything that happens over the weekend.
They seem to have a paranoid fear of anything getting out. This, I suppose, should have set even more alarm bells ringing.
Next, I am shouted at to hand over all the food I've been ordered to bring - any food, but enough for three men. I feel as if I'm on a military boot camp, although I suspect most of the participants are really just accountants from Slough.
We are all told that we are on a 'journey' and we 'will never be the same again'. Then we are led into a darkened room, where more people shout random words at us.
I seem to have wondered into a Marx Brothers film, but without the laughs.
The unnamed men, dressed in black with their black face paint, want me to hand over my mobile phone, watch, books and food. I do, but I am subjected to a complete search of my bag and my body.
They discover half a bottle of rum, notebook and pen. The faux commando is livid. He shrieks: 'Do you have problems following orders?' I nod guiltily, stunning him into silence.
We are directed to another dark room, where all the new recruits and I sit for more than an hour. In silence. At this point, I'm just wondering what on earth is going to happen next.
Suddenly, three men burst in, give me a bandana for a blindfold and take me to a place where drums are beating. I remove the blindfold to see I am surrounded by what I can only describe as the Men In Black.
Many of the men in the group talk about their relationships, work and feelings of anger and regret
A leader holding a wooden staff decorated with feathers rambles on about the mission of the weekend, using the pompous jargon that would later become very familiar: words like 'shadow', 'warriors', 'masculine', 'commitment' and 'responsibility'.
He tells us how to be a man. It's hard to take from a man wearing face paint, carrying a feathered stick.
Having finished his speech, he calls upon men at random to stand up and explain why they were there. Hard to say why, but people are starting to open their hearts.
One man cries as he answers questions about his unhappy marriage. The guards stand in a threatening circle around us, staring aggressively in silence.
I am starting to feel very uncomfortable. When I signed up for the course, they told me I couldn't drive there because there was a shortage of car-parking spaces.
Instead, I was told I should join the others on their minibus to travel several miles from the station, so it is with a sinking feeling that I realise I am stranded.
Many of the men talk about their relationships, work and feelings of anger and regret. 'Sharing', they call it. They all appeared sincere and open. Not buttoned up and repressed, but here-it-is, take-it-all, heart-on-my-sleeve types.
It is here that I learn a piece of warrior etiquette. When a brother 'shares', the correct response is to raise both hands as if surrendering and waggle your hands. At the same time, you say ' Ahho'. At first, I mishear and say 'Ahoy'.
Until the early hours of the morning, we engage in a series of exercises. I have to tell one man what makes me a man, and then wait while he tells me what makes him one, too. We are asked to describe how we fail to stand up to women.
When Tom signed up for the course, they told him he couldn't drive there because there was a shortage of car-parking spaces
'They're always getting at you to put the seat down on the loo,' one of the staff men explains by way of example. For a supposed female reign of terror, this seems a weirdly banal example.
We are told to explain to each other what type of man we are. One of my 'brothers' tells me he is a liar and cheat. I suspect he means he has had affairs.
Another tells how he feels worthless, a third man explains he doesn't know how to control his anger, and another tells me his wife won't let him ride his bike.
It's not long before the blindfold is back on and we are asked to imagine we're in an African village. To assist this illusion, the Men In Black rattle pots, flick water at us and make vocal noises to represent a bustling settlement.
It's not entirely convincing. We are asked to imagine capturing a wild man who terrorises villagers and cage him. We then have to set him free.
We have been asked to visualise meeting an animal along the way. This becomes our 'warrior' name. And I spend the rest of the time with Mighty Condor, Courageous Wolf and Intrepid Panther.
It is odd that no one opts for a sheep, wombat or guinea pig. I, however, become Relaxed Penguin. Oh Lord. Now I've written that, they can identify their Judas.
It's very late. I am tired and hungry and even my sleeping bag in a freezing yurt with strangers seems attractive. It's not. I don't sleep because, a couple of hours later, the rhythmic banging of drums begins.
A man appears at the door: 'Men, we have work to do.' We are ordered to strip and line up for a cold shower. While each man steps under the water, the others watch and count to 60.
I manage to get a few words with some of the participants and they are mostly between the ages of 35 and 45.
They are not all - as I'd supposed - saddos. They work in careers such as banking, IT, education and business and all strike me as intelligent, articulate and enthusiastic about their participation in the project. The majority seem to feel that their lives are not going as they wish.
After breakfast (a handful of nuts and a spoonful of porridge) we spend the morning sharing how we feel. We roar like lions. We talk to our childhood selves and watch the staff men act out scenes such as where one man says yes and the other says no.
Over and over. It was like watching a section of a Pinter play performed by nine-year-olds.
Then it is time for what I found one of the most disturbing parts of the weekend - where we are effectively 'broken free' of our emotional past.
We are divided into three groups, each of which has a so-called 'sacred carpet', and for about an hour each man is subjected to emotionally manipulative questioning, on the carpet, that probes into his past.
Some of the staff are very skilled at reading visual signs of hidden emotion. At times, three inquisitors demand the answers to questions that eventually leave a man weeping and apparently broken.
This is happening simultaneously on all three mats. At times, it is impossible to hear what was happening on my own mat because of the wails and screams from the other groups.
I feel as if I'm on a military boot camp, although I suspect most of the participants are really just accountants from Slough
The majority of the men who participate in this spectacle positively welcome this treatment. Others appear less keen. The objective seems to be to provoke a violent reaction from the person in the circle.
One man of about 40 has an issue with his mother. He felt she had treated him badly when he was younger.
A staff man is chosen to represent the mother and, while other men stand in front of him, he is goaded to confront her by pushing through a human barrier.
Instead, he flies into an uncontrolled rage. Staff become panicked and shout 'safety' as they try to immobilise him. If these staff men have any professional training, I am unaware of it.
The qualification they seem to share is that they are graduates of the course I am now on. ManKind deny that any therapy takes place. They call it training.
Another man sobs as he is told to act out beating his stepfather and mother to death. Again, he feels that they ignored him as a child and treated him with disdain.
A third man is pinned to the floor by six men and has to wrestle his way out from under a blanket, cheered on by the watching men. It is extremely disturbing to watch.
Many of the men seem to feel they suffered mental or physical abuse from their parents. They all appear to be functioning in day-to-day life, but these horrors appear easily released under the persistent and intimate questioning of their inquisitors.
I make up a story about feeling guilty for hurting a former girlfriend. I give no specific examples, but feign deep upset. They suggest my behaviour had started in childhood. I tell them it hadn't.
Deprived of food and sleep and subjected to the raging emotions of people around him, Tom is instructed to strip, put his blindfold back on and hold the hand of the man next to him
They talk of regressing me. I don't know if these amateur psychiatrists could achieve that or not, but they opt for getting me to wrench the guilt from my stomach by wrestling a rope up through my legs being held by four men.
Most of the men I speak to afterwards seem delighted by this experience. In fact, this is a point at which some men seem to embrace the Warrior Brotherhood.
To me it seems like a way of initiating people into a kind of cult. This session is clearly designed to be the pivotal moment in the weekend.
Now comes the time when we are awarded our warrior's insignia.
Deprived of food and sleep and subjected to the raging emotions of people around me, I am instructed to strip, put my blindfold back on and hold the hand of the man next to me.
It is now we begin the walk in the woods that leads to that candle-lit ceremony where we become New Warriors.
As I am led, blindfolded, naked and freezing, I am strangely resigned to this new, weird way of life. The other men in the group are all relaxed about such a journey.
In the candle-lit room, we are led by hand around the circle of men. Our animal names are called and all the men cheer.
With horribly vivid images playing in my mind of pot-bellies, male genitalia and saggy bums, I return to my yurt and sleep for a couple of hours.
The cult-like intensity with which some of my fellow warriors converted to the brotherhood astonished me
Morning arrives and, after standing in a field 'reclaiming my paternal name', we begin 'sharing' again.
At this point, we're sprayed with burning sage and instructed - naked again - to get in the sweat lodge. This is a tent heated by burning coals.
It is pitch black inside and we are told to shout blessings, make noise, howl, quote poems and sing songs. We are finally given a meal consisting of the food we brought, and then we say our goodbyes by silently staring at each staff man.
The participants hug one another and proclaim their love to their fellow brothers. They give blessings and thank each other for the 'strength' and 'joy' they have received.
I get home and close the door behind me. I have never felt so relieved to be back in the real world. It takes me two full days to get the strange mantras and patterns of speech out of my head.
The overriding message of the course seemed confused: That we were suppressed warriors and had become emasculated; that we had to reconnect with the wild man; and to get in touch with our feelings. It was 21st-century New Age meets Neanderthal man.
The cult-like intensity with which some of my fellow warriors converted to the brotherhood astonished me.
I had been given a chilling lesson in how easily - and how fast - the kind of men I rub shoulders with every day can alter: can become aggressive and subservient by turns; and gripped by something strange.
And something else shocked me. This was an organisation that aimed to tell me how to be a man.
Yet not once during that weird and frightening weekend did I ever hear it acknowledged that we men share a world. With women.
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DannyB II:
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