We hope that you've been doing alright.....

[Rachael]

In another recent topic, someone wrote the following to me:

Pray you are well [...]

In this case, it is entirely possible that this was meant sincerely and genuinely. Chances are, it was. And in writing the following, I mean no affront to the person wishing me well.

That being said, in most cases on this forum or in the outside world when I've run into an AARC grad/staffer, it is not meant in such a nice way.

The implication underlying this type of statement is that since I have not graduated AARC and embraced the AARC way, I could not possibly be doing well. The belief is that us poor AARC strays must be having such a hard go of it being "dead, in jail, or in the gutter".


So, having heard this one too many times, I'd just like to say:

I'm fine! I am happy! I love my life and the people in it!


I am doing well, at one point a year or two ago I listed some of the things I've been doing since escaping AARC, maybe it's time to do so again...

I work for an Oil and Gas company playing on computers and making more than any other person I've met my age (and it just gets better with pending raises). I absolutely love my job and the people I work with; I can't wait to get to work in the mornings. I spend my day fixing complicated technical problems, responding to emergency situations and speaking with interesting people from across Canada in French and English.

My partner and I celebrated our three year anniversary on Boxing Day 2006, and we are expecting a baby girl to be born anytime now (due March 3). We are both completely ecstatic to be starting a family together and it's all fallen into place just at the right time. Both of our families are closely involved and also very excited about the first grandchild/great-grandchild.

I am a semi-professional athlete and spend part of my summer every year traveling across N. America going to races with my partner and also my youngest sister who's just started competing with us. I compete in speedboarding and streetluge.

I'm on the Board of Directors for a non-profit organization that promotes safety and our sport. As well, our non-profit is now in the second year of putting on an event with a budget of just over $110 000.

And of course, the only point which most AARCites seem to care about... I have not used any mid-altering substance since two weeks before I entered AARC. That is to say, I have not used any drug at all, with the exception of the very occasional glass of wine or beer (never more than one, and certainly not at all since I've been pregnant). I didn't smoke before AARC and still don't, and I even stay away from caffeine, save the occaisional tea that may have a bit. Of course, before I entered AARC I had already decided not to use drugs again (and stated so on many occasions), so take that as you may.

So... that being said, thank you all for your concern, but I am doing marvelously.


Rachael

[Anonymous]

I'm going to beat the next person to this so we can avoid future negative responses.

But all this means is that you're a dry drunk.

You're clearly a "hurt'n unit" or you wouldn't come to this forum and post such an angry topic.

You're in denial.

The disease is cunning, baffling, and powerful and it will catch up with you.

You can write coherently and you seem perfectly sane online, so this must mean that you're "in your head" in order to hide from your true feelings.

You're lying. Someone who's not an addict stays in AARC until graduation and then attends AA afterwards because they are not afraid to live without addiction. If you leave AARC it means that you were afraid of the the truth. You're an addict and you posted this because you're so ashamed of yourself.

Did I miss anything?

[Anonymous]

racheal,
have you considered pressing charges?
(PLEASE for the ones that arent as strong as you)

[brnd_n3w]

I think it can go both ways. There are always differing perspectives even when the facts are presented in only one fashion.  You can say something and tell it exactly how it is, and depending on who's reading it or who sees it, it is going to get judged based on that persons perspective/life experiences.  So either:

Rachael is doing extremely well. Or

She is a dry drunk doing extremely well, but like it was stated before, it will eventually catch up to her. Personally, I don't know her at all. But my story is kind of similar.

[Antigen]

Is this for real? Seriously, are you people still this washed or is this satire? Sometimes it's hard to tell.

[Oz girl]

what is a dry drunk?

[Antigen]

Dry drunk is an AA term for someone who doesn't drink or use mind altering drugs but rejects the cult's philosophy or is critical of the cult in any way.

[Anonymous]

Not really....a dry drunk is someone who does not use but still lives and feels the same way.
I don't think Rachael is a dry drunk and its good to hear she is doing well.I worked on staff when she went through and its good to hear she is happy.

[ajax13]

I have a close friend who was in AARC for an extended period. This person is a graduate.  On two occasions we have encountered former staffers in public, once in a mall and once in a grocery store.  On both occasions, immediately upon recognizing my friend, the staffers became visibly agitated and fled. The condescending tone I have witnessed from pro-AARC posters is disturbing in light of the indisputable proof that Vause falsely calls himself a psychologist, the indisputable links between Vause, the Union Institute and Miller Newton, and Newton's verifiably criminal practices.

[Anonymous]

As a former staff member I see graduates in public and am fine talking to them. Sometimes I get weird looks from them and will not approach if I sense they are uncomfortable. I talk to graduates who are not in the sober lifestyle and I do not judge them for it.  I live my life the way I choose and they do the same.None of us are wrong or right for how we live. I love AARC and I am not ashamed of the place that helped me but unfortunatly not everyone feels the same way-so what?!
Just my 2 cents

[ajax13]

As to your question "so what?", one of the staff members to whom I referred earlier was involved in the coercion of my friend to recant an accusation of abuse in one of the host homes.  Years after my friend's graduation, this counselor acknowledged that my friend's assault was irrelevant to her recanting.  Specifically, my friend had been bitten on the face, yet this was dismissed as self-mutilation in order to cover up the abuses inherent in a program of sending kids into the homes that have produced extremely self-destructive children. So yes, some of us are wrong in how we live if we assault kids or force kids to lie to cover up serious problems.  The suicides, the lack of staff accreditation, the vast amounts of money that went into a program run out of a warehouse beside a seismic yard with no medical staff and no residential facilities; all of these things are real and not a matter of opinion.

[Anonymous]

have you gone to the authorites ajax?
Confronting people on fornits will not redress what was done to you or the other kids. It certainly wont make them stop their abuse- its way of life for them

[ajax13]

The victim to whom I referred was, as I said, forced to recant.  This was not a recent incident.  Vause has had run-ins with the authorities, but he is in a very safe position.  The system is really quite brilliant.  Use former clients as counselors and put the clients in the homes that produce the clients.  If a young person comes forward with accounts of abuse, everyone involved but Vause is tainted and can be discredited based on their status as a drug user.

[Anonymous]

still, yes its hard. But surely you can try? Just file a report? Gather a group of survivors through this site and go together? Find people who specialize in cult abuse
inform the authorities of the system and why Vause is too blame.

Im not  unappretiative of the difficulties of getting the authorites involved, or the difficulty of simple coming foward, but surely there has to be some way or no one gets justice and the system continues.

try going WITH a lawyer and a journalist and a cult specialist to the authrotites

The authorites will be forced to be responsible by their precense.
have u gone to them with your experience yet?

[ajax13]

As AARC has been used by the authorities in lieu of incarceration for young people, a more evolved method than calling the cops and/or a lawyer and/or a journalist.  Some readers may be familiar with an incident out of the distant past wherein a young woman alleged that she had been stabbed after an inappropriate relationship with a particular authority figure.  The authority figure was absolved of all wrong-doing by the authorities and the young lady's injuries were attributed to her own acts.  This type of incident with the resultant response of the justice system is not unique in the annals of AARC.