Treatment Abuse, Behavior Modification, Thought Reform > Facility Question and Answers
The Carlbrook thread
Charly:
I could see the bans-thing to a certain extent, but it tended to be applied very arbitrarily. My son said if the head guy felt like it he would just say to a kid, "You're on bans with XXXX" for no reason.
The thing that I DID understand was the fact that a lot of the girls had real boundary issues with boys- that was a big part of their problem. My son was warned by some pretty good therapists to stay away from this one girl and he didn't. It was pretty disastrous for both of them. She told my son he was "helping her" and he bought it. She is still a mess- 3 years later.
psy:
I might as well answer my own question in case there aren't any cedu vets handy.
A "friend" means "the harsher the truth to tell, the truer the friend that tells it" NOT "the harder..."
If you are a "friend" you are supposed to be a friend by helping others to "follow the program" IE. rat on other students. If you are a friend... you will confront other friends in group, attacking them about flaws you see in them...
that is program friendship. Getting close... god forbid love.. is verboten.
Charly:
That is why they had 4 in a room- so there wouldn't be twosies forming. I agree they probably had that view of friendship. My son actually made some good friends there- he is still in touch with a lot of them- especially the girls.
psy:
--- Quote from: ""Charly"" ---I could see the bans-thing to a certain extent, but it tended to be applied very arbitrarily. My son said if the head guy felt like it he would just say to a kid, "You're on bans with XXXX" for no reason.
--- End quote ---
If they had a reason, they may have had a hunch.. and that was enough...
--- Quote ---The thing that I DID understand was the fact that a lot of the girls had real boundary issues with boys- that was a big part of their problem. My son was warned by some pretty good therapists to stay away from this one girl and he didn't. It was pretty disastrous for both of them. She told my son he was "helping her" and he bought it. She is still a mess- 3 years later.
--- End quote ---
He fell for a girl.. Since when do young people listen to their elders about love? That whole area is a "learn by doing" thing exclusively.
psy:
--- Quote from: ""Charly"" ---That is why they had 4 in a room- so there wouldn't be twosies forming. I agree they probably had that view of friendship. My son actually made some good friends there- he is still in touch with a lot of them- especially the girls.
--- End quote ---
This isn't to say friendships didn't form... Lots of "bonds" formed... how many could be considered "friendships" is another argument entirely...
When you're in group. you learn almost everything there is to know about other people. It's hard not to get closer as a group. But it's not always closer in a healthy way... Like I said.. attacking was love...
Great analogy: Group was verbal fight group.... with emotions and words...
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