Giving love back....

[Jay]

Hi...

My fiance spent two years of her life in one of Straight's facilities. Those monsters spent two years poisioning her mind, destroying her spirit. When she should have been developing as a person, growing and experiencing life, instead she was imprisioned by the one person that was supposed to take care of her, the one person who she was supposed to trust, the one person that was supposed to love her more than anyone else, her mother. And even after 17 years her mother isn't even capable of understanding what she's done to her own daughter.

My fiance has never known love from anyone her entire life. Her father was a abusive bastard, her mother uncaring bitch. And if that wasn't terrible enough add in two years of torture and brainwashing in Straight. I can understand why she has trouble believing in the word 'Love'. I would too.

My family background is the complete opposite of hers. I've a large caring family, and have never known what it's like to not have love. Which makes it all the more difficult to understand what she's been through. I mean, I understand, I know what she's gone through. But I don't think I will ever truly know.

I love her. I know this. She has a hard time believing it though. She can't believe me. I understand why, but that doesn't make it any easier. I know that this has to do with, both, her parents being completely devoid of any trace of humanity and being forced into Straight's "re-education" program. I can't tell you how much pain this has caused us. She's worth it though. She maynot believe it, but I do.

Unfortunatly because of Straight's influence we have some pretty tough times. I'm very thankful though, that this forum exists. It's allowed us insight into where this "no holds barred", break you down, drill sergeant, flay your heart open and make you feel like shit fighting style came from. I know now that this was part of the Straight Curriculmm of Terror. This is a part of the woman I love that isn't a part of who she really is. It's training. And I beleive that it's something that we can work through.

I'm not really sure if there's any advice that anyone out there has. I mean aside from never give up, never stop trying. I guess I just want to tell part of my story. If anyone out there knows what I'm talking about let me know. Strength in numbers.

Givin' love back... to the ones it was stolen from....




P.S. I love you princess.


[ This Message was edited by: Moobie on 2003-02-28 13:29 ]

[METALGOD8]

Thank you for being willing to be considerate of your fiance' and the situations that exist because of the Straight Curriculum of Terror. I offer my email address to you too, [email protected]. I would be happy to talk or whatever if you want. Tough times are common, but we will get through them.
Thank you,  MG8 :smokin:

[Anonymous]

You can't go wrong with the love. Love never fails. Keep up the love that never fails. You can stop any man but a man in love.

[Anonymous]

You can also find another sounding board and supportive spouses of survivors on the "spouse board. Just click on forums on the left and click on Spouses of survivors.
Whoever she is she sounds very lucky to have you , as  you seem very loving and caring.

[Anonymous]

I personally have found some healing to be in the following forms:

therapeutic bodywork: for example, massage, polarity therapy, energy field healing (see Hands of Light by Barbara Brennan), and other groovy stuff -- the integrity and capability of the bodyworker as well as how comfortable you feel with them are more important, I think, than the specific modality.  

anything that makes my life feel better. I personally like to clean the house. I always feel better. I also like to have a beautiful room. Good music & walks in nature, too.