The postulated ideals are most laudable; certainly that was the clincher in my case. But before your initial interview is over, you're already sucked in by the insinuation that you are running away from a challenge by not attending, or that (you or) your goals are shallower/more superficial, more materialistic, or more primitive than theirs...
I could not agree more. The Hyde ideals are laudable, as you say. That's what drew me in. Like you, it seems, within hours I realized that Hyde's laudable goals are so far from reality at the school. Sadly, many Hyde staff twist these goals in unimaginably destructive ways, mostly to suit their own pathological purposes. The distance between Hyde's public rhetoric and the lived reality is vast. What I find so depressing is the stark contrast between the core values, on the one hand, and, on the other hand, the punitive, arrogant, self-serving and destructive ways in which many Hyde staff treat students and parents. I am sickened by what I've seen in seminars, where staff and alumni parents patronize, insult, and berate students and other parents. This is particularly compelling when I see a kid who's obviously suffering from some major psychiatric problem get stomped on emotionally because he can't quite get the Hyde mantra. I think it's criminal that Hyde treats these kids this way; many of these kids shouldn't be at Hyde in the first place. While some staff are well meaning, the widespread incompetence and downright cruelty I've seen at Hyde has convinced me that Hyde is a terrible environment for a very large percentage of the people there. I wish I had known more about the school when I enrolled my child. At this point, Hyde feels like a horrible stain and no bleach well obliterate it.