Hyde School, Organizational Incest

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Anonymous:
A therapist once gave me an a paper on organizational incest in order to help me put my Hyde experience in perspective. As I read that paper, I felt that it could have been written about Hyde specificaly, for its accurate description of the community. What relief I felt. It showed me I was not alone and especially that I was not crazy for having the feelings that I did about Hyde and for wanting so badly to leave it far behind.

Yet, the farther I have traveled, the more the trauma of my time at Hyde has stayed with me. And, so has the grief - sadness for friendships lost, for a community that I thought I was part of but that vanished once I voiced discontent. Most of all, sadness for what I lost as a teen who trusted adults who were not trustworthy, as it turns out.

That was years ago. Yet, from reading the posts in this forum, it seems the concept of organizational incest still applies to what is going on at the Hyde Schools. I would appreciate if anyone else knows about this concept and would be willing to share more about it. This forum, for which I am deeply grateful, like the organizational incest paper, has confirmed that I am not alone in my perception that something is amiss at Hyde.

Anonymous:

--- Quote ---On 2006-03-05 10:31:00, Anonymous wrote:

"A therapist once gave me an a paper on organizational incest in order to help me put my Hyde experience in perspective. As I read that paper, I felt that it could have been written about Hyde specificaly, for its accurate description of the community. What relief I felt. It showed me I was not alone and especially that I was not crazy for having the feelings that I did about Hyde and for wanting so badly to leave it far behind.

Yet, the farther I have traveled, the more the trauma of my time at Hyde has stayed with me. And, so has the grief - sadness for friendships lost, for a community that I thought I was part of but that vanished once I voiced discontent. Most of all, sadness for what I lost as a teen who trusted adults who were not trustworthy, as it turns out.

That was years ago. Yet, from reading the posts in this forum, it seems the concept of organizational incest still applies to what is going on at the Hyde Schools. I would appreciate if anyone else knows about this concept and would be willing to share more about it. This forum, for which I am deeply grateful, like the organizational incest paper, has confirmed that I am not alone in my perception that something is amiss at Hyde."

--- End quote ---

I can confirm that Hyde's incestuous quality lives on - big time. Those of us who are still connected to Hyde see glaring evidence of the astonishing inbreeding. Just scan the list of Hyde administrators and staff and draw lines connecting the people who are spouses, siblings, children or in some other way related to each other. It's an amazing drawing.

Anyone who has been around Hyde awhile knows that Hyde has paid a huge price because of this incest. Like the phenomenon of folie a deux (French for "madness shared by two"), Hyde staff continually feed each other's world view and "We're right, you're wrong." stance toward nearly everyone outside of Hyde. Hyde is full of "lifers" who have completely bought in to the Gauld cult; they tend to give virtually the same speeches, use the same jargon, and give the same glib answers to questions (especially those that challenge Hyde). Hyde is a case study of what happens to an organization that uses a cookie cutter approach to hiring staff, training staff, and delivering its product. Over time these organizations lose touch with the outside world. Take a look at the number of Hyde "lifers" who are "married" to the school. My strong impression is that many of these people have had a hard time in their own lives and would have difficulty functioning outside the Hyde commune. Hyde gives them a sense of purpose, a clear script, jargon for "insiders," and the illusion that their view of the world is the only acceptable one (standard cult qualities). I continue to meet lots of parents and some faculty who smell this quality once they get to know Hyde and flee, eventually. Of course, other parents and staff are seduced and buy into the Hyde mythology.

Hyde now appears to be paying a price for this incest. More and more educational consultants seem to be figuring out Hyde's severe limitations, incestuous qualities, and questionable competence and effectiveness. High turnover and attrition at Hyde may be evidence of this.

If you're interested in reading about organizational incest of the sort that exists at Hyde, here's a book by William White: http://www.chestnut.org/LI/bookstore/Bl ... ncest.html

So, you're definitely not alone in your perception of Hyde's incest. It's real.

Anonymous:

--- Quote ---On 2006-03-07 12:26:00, Anonymous wrote:

"
--- Quote ---
On 2006-03-05 10:31:00, Anonymous wrote:

"A therapist once gave me an a paper on organizational incest in order to help me put my Hyde experience in perspective. As I read that paper, I felt that it could have been written about Hyde specificaly, for its accurate description of the community. What relief I felt. It showed me I was not alone and especially that I was not crazy for having the feelings that I did about Hyde and for wanting so badly to leave it far behind.

Yet, the farther I have traveled, the more the trauma of my time at Hyde has stayed with me. And, so has the grief - sadness for friendships lost, for a community that I thought I was part of but that vanished once I voiced discontent. Most of all, sadness for what I lost as a teen who trusted adults who were not trustworthy, as it turns out.

That was years ago. Yet, from reading the posts in this forum, it seems the concept of organizational incest still applies to what is going on at the Hyde Schools. I would appreciate if anyone else knows about this concept and would be willing to share more about it. This forum, for which I am deeply grateful, like the organizational incest paper, has confirmed that I am not alone in my perception that something is amiss at Hyde."

--- End quote ---

Do you mind us asking if you went to a therapist as a result of the trauma you experienced at Hyde? Am interested in knowing what else this therapist thought of your experiences. I am too ashamed to report back to my therapist as she warned me NOT to place our son at Hyde. After reading all the materials Hyde sent us, she saw right through them. I am sorry I did not listen to her, but maybe I am a better person for all I went through."

--- End quote ---

I'm not the person who was a student at Hyde. I'm another parent. Like you, we ended up going to Hyde against our better judgment. We too failed to follow the red flags and all the warnings. After we arrived at Hyde we discovered that so much about this school is harmful to students and parents. I'll be the first to admit that a small minority of people like Hyde. But I'll also be the first to admit that I've met so many people who can't get far enough away from Hyde once they discover all the organizational incest, the poor example set by Joe Gauld, the school's inability to provide so many of its students with the help they need. I'm so happy to learn about this web site. People who are thinking about Hyde should absolutely know about all the unhappy parents and graduates.

Anonymous:
I wrote the original entry about organizational incest. Sorry for the typo in the first paragraph. I can spell, just can't type.

Thanks to the person who suggested further resources. I will read them.

In answer to the question about my therapist, her role was to help me put my experiences as student and staffer into perspective rather than to offer me her opinions. The organizational incest article came to her mind as I described my Hyde experiences. The nature of the incest in the community was broader than the intermarriage of alums/staff, employment of extended Gauld family, recruitment of extended family and friends of students/staff, although that certainly was part of it. It included the shared lingo and behaviors, the insular nature of the community, and a number of other traits.

Over the years, I have worked on Hyde-related issues in therapy numerous times. Some of the issues are...
Shame for letting myself get sucked in and for recruiting others in my family, betrayal and victimization by adults whom I trusted, shame as teacher/intern for perpetuating behaviors that had caused me emotional harm as a student, sadness because I invested so heavily in what I idealistically believed was a worthy cause that was going to "change American education" , loss when I left the community and relationships there behind, anger at ways in which I was treated, particularly by staff of the opposite sex, dismay when I think of open school meetings in the student union where parents exposed to the whole community their deepest, darkest sexual secrets, inadequacy when thrown into a class to teach a subject I myself had not studied since the 10th grade, shock at the behaviors I witnessed in my trusted mentors as the community turned in on itself and imploded, etc, etc. There are complex layers to each of these emotions, but the most difficult to live with are those related to ways in which I may have caused harm to others.

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