Author Topic: What Lynn Teaches Us About Daytop  (Read 1382 times)

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Offline Paul St. John

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What Lynn Teaches Us About Daytop
« on: January 21, 2006, 04:14:00 PM »
I remember this one time after a few months after I got out of Daytop,I was working for this catering company and we were selling food at this L.I. Health fair.  This was a nice sized fair.  Pretty much every organisation on Long Island who has a claim to understanding some aspect of health or another was there.  Usually when we take on decent fair or festival, we would be one of many food providers, but but we had this one exclusive.  It was a coll situation we did there, and we did good busioness.  In the past, the fair committee would usually used companies who specailised in health food.  We were far from specailised in health food, but we got in.

  When I first got there, I noticed that Daytop had itself a booth, but I didn t see anyone there.

Later that day, we had a huge rush.  We had only two people manning the counter, with only myself on the grill.  I was working as fast as I could.  I see on the line, Lynn, a girl whom I had went to Daytop with.She sees me too, and I get the sense that she is feeling excited inside about something in a very smug way.  

When she gets up to the frontI try to be both nice, and polite, but also stay focussed on my job and keep the line moving.  

" Hey Lynn.  Hw ya' doin?"

 " Hi Paul"  She has a devious grin, like she has me beat at something, but I never realised we were competing at anything.  It was nice to see her and the day goes on.

I ignore her grin and say courteously, " Can I get ya something, Lynn?"

She places her order.

While I'm preparing her food, I say, " So how's everything goin'?  You here as a Daytop representative?"

"Yeah", says Lynn

Her devious, boldness seems to be growing within her.

I ignore it further, and continue on.

"Wow", I said. " You must be a coordinator by now."

LOL!  Now the bitch looks at me all proud, and I swear her body language and overall demeanor convey that she thought I should be scared of her, as she said " Yes.", and then continued," Are you still clean?"

Being that I had a line of health fanatics and as I explained earlier this was a good gig for us, I gave her a quick, " Yes."

I was actually lying.  I had went back to drinking in the evenings, I did not consider it her or anyone else's business.

As I handed her her food, she just stood there looking at me with this smile, like she knew I was lying.  I could see her attempts to look through me, as I waitied for her to leave, so I oculd help the next customer.

lol.. She just stood there, like waiting for me to cop to my gu9ilt or something.

I wanted to say, " Get off my line you crazy bitch!"

Again, it was against all odds, that we got this gig, and I had top be proffessional.  So instead, I just took the order of the person behind her, and sain good-bye to her.  She said good-bye in her smug way, and walked away looking like she was floating in a cloud...so happy, and so proud, as in her mind, she had just beat me in some way.

I remember thinking to myself, " That cloud isn't real, Lynn, and it's gonna burst on ya one of these days."

My employer's girl said to me," I can't beleive what that bitch just did.  What the hell was that?"  ( She couldn't beleive what she had just witnessed.  I explained a little about Daytop to her later, and my life went on.

Lynn, on the hand, probably spent much of her time tormented by self-doubt and low self-esteem, no matter hpw much the program was on her side and told her that she was right.

It was not lost on me that I was providing a valuable service both to the many hungry people at the fair and my employer, Lynn was doing Public Relations for as company that fucks the minds of youths(probably just reciting rhetoric, and making shit up as she went all day), and yet she felt she had a god-given right to cause me harm.  To her if I was not a sober Daytop person, I was not a person at all and all other attributes of my character were null and void.

Something that they never taught at daytop was that destruction is always destruction no matter what cause you do it in the name of.

For an alread destructive girl, like Lynn, Daytop just gives a new medium through which to be destrcutive, pat her on the back, and send her on her way.  Such a person becomes more destructive then ever, as now they feel that they are justified and right, and are consistently encouraged to continue in this direction, and as well are rewarded for it.

Such a person has been sober for a year, but such a person is hardly a person anymore.

Paul St. John
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