From a Hyde Students Prospective

[Anonymous]

I've read some of your posts and see the same thing being said over and over again, yet some of the Hyde fans dispute it.

I was there and I lived Hyde for three years.  I found the biggest challenge was to separate the  message from the messenger.

Hyde has some great aspects to the school, but the biggest problem is the faculty who I found hypocritical, dishonest and mostly screwed up themselves. Please understand I am not saying that ALL of the faculty is this way, but when I was there, most of them were, and certainly the ones who have been there for years, still "haven't gotten it."  The good faculty who I did cherish, don't really buy into the process but pretend to in order to make a living till they can get out.

I keep seeing many people on this website saying the same thing about the faculty being dishonest and hypocritical.  Why would so many people say the same exact thing if it were not true?

Hyde has some great tools for life skills, but I had trouble comprehending the process when the faculty did not practice what they preached.  It was hard to understand the concept when I saw daily examples not being set.  

The physical accountabilities at Hyde should be changed.  I never had the "5:30's" like my friends, but I would hear my friends complain about having difficulty getting out of bed due to soreness and pain, or bruses on their knees from having done lunges on hard surfaces.  They also would throw up at times from not having anything in their stomach and then doing these hard workouts.

Also the "2-4" is plain wrong.  It was a public display of making us feel shame and embarassment in front of the whole school.  I still have nightmares about this.

To me Hyde is a fear based disciplinary school.  Students are driven by fear.  If some kids do well in this kind of environment then I am happy for them and their outcome, but I will tell you there are more kids who have been harmed emotionally by Hyde then have had positive experiences.  Many of my friends from Hyde who I have stayed in touch with are still wandering around lost and without an education or jobs.

Some Hyde students will come back and say the opposite and say they had a good experience, but I am just telling you mine.  I also think that some of the people on this board who are saying positive things are really the faculty who are not admitting who they are.

By the way I am doing well, but have had trouble moving along as fast as I would like because I am playing catch up from the poor education I received at Hyde.  College is a struggle for me because we did not learn the basics at Hyde.

Overall I am not bitter towards Hyde, but I think it is a very bad place to send your child unless you have no other choice.

[Anonymous]

I also did not go on 2-4 or do 5:30s like my friends.  Maybe it was a fear-based incentive, but I shouldn't have been smoking or stealing anyway.  Social intimidation prevented me from screwing up for a while.  I also felt really humiliated at times, especially during the "senior prep" process when my peers actually had a say as to whether or not I could become a senior.  Their criticism wasn't altogether harsh, but I got the feeling that they saw me as a mouse compared to the people in my class who were given continuous praise-- loud or boisterous personalities always had more character, even when they were proven liars.  You can't count on the quiet ones.  That hurt.

People who seem to like the place are the ones who love crisis, because that is essentially the state you live in all the time.  It is draining, and nobody says it's fun.  Hyde supporters call it uncomfortable and say that it's healthy for growth.  In that kind of environment how can students learn to grow when there's not a crisis?  "Drama" is what makes Hyde school a rough place.  Better moments were the times when we really pulled together, like the championship basketball games.  We cheered hard as fans.  We routed for each other as students.  Big brother was watching.  Nobody liked seeing a peer get slammed, but we all jumped in when our a%#@es were on the line.  Comfort came in private.  What does that say about the school?

[Lars]

Well said - coherent and not too vitriolic (like my early posts).  :razz: One of my "issues" (as they put it at Hyde) is that I've always been too sensitive, I take things too personally.  Of course, practicing law has thickened my skin quite a bit, but the hard feelings I'd had from back when I went to Hyde, well, they came out in a big way when I started posting here (of course, it was good to get them off my chest).  It's good to see that you can evaluate things in a reasonable way.

Keep working hard in college.  It sounds like you do have the tools to succeed and it's well worth it.  Success there will open up doors for you that you might not have expected.

[Lars]

On 2005-12-10 08:53:00, Anonymous wrote:

"I also did not go on 2-4 or do 5:30s like my friends.  Maybe it was a fear-based incentive, but I shouldn't have been smoking or stealing anyway.  Social intimidation prevented me from screwing up for a while.  I also felt really humiliated at times, especially during the "senior prep" process when my peers actually had a say as to whether or not I could become a senior.  Their criticism wasn't altogether harsh, but I got the feeling that they saw me as a mouse compared to the people in my class who were given continuous praise-- loud or boisterous personalities always had more character, even when they were proven liars.  You can't count on the quiet ones.  That hurt.



People who seem to like the place are the ones who love crisis, because that is essentially the state you live in all the time.  It is draining, and nobody says it's fun.  Hyde supporters call it uncomfortable and say that it's healthy for growth.  In that kind of environment how can students learn to grow when there's not a crisis?  "Drama" is what makes Hyde school a rough place.  Better moments were the times when we really pulled together, like the championship basketball games.  We cheered hard as fans.  We routed for each other as students.  Big brother was watching.  Nobody liked seeing a peer get slammed, but we all jumped in when our a%#@es were on the line.  Comfort came in private.  What does that say about the school?"

Best post I've read on this board.  You're right on the money - the constant fear, drama, & crisis sucked the fun out of almost every activity there.  My best memory from there was from football when we upset another school that should have beaten us by three touchdowns.  Football was hard, but unlike most other components of Hyde, I think it operated much like other football programs - real education in teamwork, not constant confrontation & humiliation.  Maybe it's just the nature of the sport - I hated wrestling (the Hyde specialty), it seemed more grim and joyless, just like everything else there.  And you've alluded to another important thing, sometimes it's the quiet folks who are the true leaders.  Unfortunately, Hyde valued and praised the loudmouths (who often turned out to be hypocrites).

[Anonymous]

On 2005-12-10 07:20:00, Anonymous wrote:

"I've read some of your posts and see the same thing being said over and over again, yet some of the Hyde fans dispute it.



I was there and I lived Hyde for three years.  I found the biggest challenge was to separate the  message from the messenger.



Hyde has some great aspects to the school, but the biggest problem is the faculty who I found hypocritical, dishonest and mostly screwed up themselves. Please understand I am not saying that ALL of the faculty is this way, but when I was there, most of them were, and certainly the ones who have been there for years, still "haven't gotten it."  The good faculty who I did cherish, don't really buy into the process but pretend to in order to make a living till they can get out.



I keep seeing many people on this website saying the same thing about the faculty being dishonest and hypocritical.  Why would so many people say the same exact thing if it were not true?



Hyde has some great tools for life skills, but I had trouble comprehending the process when the faculty did not practice what they preached.  It was hard to understand the concept when I saw daily examples not being set.  



The physical accountabilities at Hyde should be changed.  I never had the "5:30's" like my friends, but I would hear my friends complain about having difficulty getting out of bed due to soreness and pain, or bruses on their knees from having done lunges on hard surfaces.  They also would throw up at times from not having anything in their stomach and then doing these hard workouts.



Also the "2-4" is plain wrong.  It was a public display of making us feel shame and embarassment in front of the whole school.  I still have nightmares about this.



To me Hyde is a fear based disciplinary school.  Students are driven by fear.  If some kids do well in this kind of environment then I am happy for them and their outcome, but I will tell you there are more kids who have been harmed emotionally by Hyde then have had positive experiences.  Many of my friends from Hyde who I have stayed in touch with are still wandering around lost and without an education or jobs.



Some Hyde students will come back and say the opposite and say they had a good experience, but I am just telling you mine.  I also think that some of the people on this board who are saying positive things are really the faculty who are not admitting who they are.



By the way I am doing well, but have had trouble moving along as fast as I would like because I am playing catch up from the poor education I received at Hyde.  College is a struggle for me because we did not learn the basics at Hyde.



Overall I am not bitter towards Hyde, but I think it is a very bad place to send your child unless you have no other choice.

"

This is a wonderfully insightful, honest, and accurate glimpse of what Hyde is really like.  Your experience at Hyde mirrors my own.  You're right that some of the Hyde concepts are sensible on paper.  Unfortunately, a critical mass of Hyde faculty and staff have led very dysfunctional lives and are now the proverbial pots calling the kettle black.  There are so many examples of Hyde's staff being inappropriate or cruel (and some are very nice and helpful); ironically, many of these staff have had notorious difficulty getting their own acts together.  This is not the kind of place I'd choose to send my child.

[Anonymous]

On 2005-12-10 08:58:00, Lars wrote:

"Well said - coherent and not too vitriolic (like my early posts).  :razz: One of my "issues" (as they put it at Hyde) is that I've always been too sensitive, I take things too personally.  Of course, practicing law has thickened my skin quite a bit, but the hard feelings I'd had from back when I went to Hyde, well, they came out in a big way when I started posting here (of course, it was good to get them off my chest).  It's good to see that you can evaluate things in a reasonable way.



Keep working hard in college.  It sounds like you do have the tools to succeed and it's well worth it.  Success there will open up doors for you that you might not have expected."

Thank you Lars. I appreciate your warm and sensitive comments. I am trying to work hard in college, but have a form of ADD and unfortunately Hyde did not have any tools in place to help someone like me.  I pretty much lost out on my entire high school education because of this.  They were more interested in whether I participated in "group" then educating me.

When I tried to transfer my senior year to a school in my hometown they told me I would have to repeat a grade because I didn't have the proper credits needed. I couldn't understand how in the world Hyde did not have me taking the basic requirements for public school? Hyde had already held me back one grade,(this is common practice even when your grades are good) so I was 18 being told I would be almost 20 by the time I graduated.  The only answer my parents and I could think of was to get my GED.  I really hate Hyde for lying that I would have all the requirements I needed for the future.  Had they been honest with my parents I probably wouldn't have gone there.  I was not in crisis and could have picked many other schools!  This is one instance where they need to look at themselves rather than asking us to look at ourselves!

It sounds like you discovered the same thing I have.  Although Hyde has some good traits, it sure didn't do me a whole lot of good and in fact harmed me.

I will catch up eventually in college, and in the future it will all be a bad distant memory, but for now it is somewhat tough and I remain bitter when I read this board and see that NOTHING has changed at that school!  Like the song goes, "I will survive" and hopefully I will be as successful as you.

[Anonymous]

On 2005-12-11 15:56:00, Anonymous wrote:

"

On 2005-12-10 08:58:00, Lars wrote:


"Well said - coherent and not too vitriolic (like my early posts).  :razz: One of my "issues" (as they put it at Hyde) is that I've always been too sensitive, I take things too personally.  Of course, practicing law has thickened my skin quite a bit, but the hard feelings I'd had from back when I went to Hyde, well, they came out in a big way when I started posting here (of course, it was good to get them off my chest).  It's good to see that you can evaluate things in a reasonable way.





Keep working hard in college.  It sounds like you do have the tools to succeed and it's well worth it.  Success there will open up doors for you that you might not have expected."

Thank you Lars. I appreciate your warm and sensitive comments. I am trying to work hard in college, but have a form of ADD and unfortunately Hyde did not have any tools in place to help someone like me.  I pretty much lost out on my entire high school education because of this.  They were more interested in whether I participated in "group" then educating me.



When I tried to transfer my senior year to a school in my hometown they told me I would have to repeat a grade because I didn't have the proper credits needed. I couldn't understand how in the world Hyde did not have me taking the basic requirements for public school? Hyde had already held me back one grade,(this is common practice even when your grades are good) so I was 18 being told I would be almost 20 by the time I graduated.  The only answer my parents and I could think of was to get my GED.  I really hate Hyde for lying that I would have all the requirements I needed for the future.  Had they been honest with my parents I probably wouldn't have gone there.  I was not in crisis and could have picked many other schools!  This is one instance where they need to look at themselves rather than asking us to look at ourselves!



It sounds like you discovered the same thing I have.  Although Hyde has some good traits, it sure didn't do me a whole lot of good and in fact harmed me.



I will catch up eventually in college, and in the future it will all be a bad distant memory, but for now it is somewhat tough and I remain bitter when I read this board and see that NOTHING has changed at that school!  Like the song goes, "I will survive" and hopefully I will be as successful as you."

Thank you for sharing your story with us.  This will help me make the decision I am struggling with on where to send my son.  I believe he needs a different kind of environment then the one I am reading about here.  I appreciate the help from all of you.

[Anonymous]

If you're seriously considering Hyde for your child, there definely is some very helpful and insightful information on this site...but it is very one sided.  If you wanted to buy an iPod, you wouldn't just go to the "I hate iPods" web blog...
Go for an interview.  It's free and you get a pretty honest look at what's going on up there.

Just don't drink the blue juice!

Good luck with your search!

[Anonymous]

On 2005-12-13 08:16:00, Anonymous wrote:

"If you're seriously considering Hyde for your child, there definely is some very helpful and insightful information on this site...but it is very one sided.  If you wanted to buy an iPod, you wouldn't just go to the "I hate iPods" web blog...

Go for an interview.  It's free and you get a pretty honest look at what's going on up there.



Just don't drink the blue juice!



Good luck with your search!"

I certainly agree that anyone who is considering Hyde should go for a visit.  We did that.  Unfortunately, we now know that much of what concerns us about Hyde was NOT disclosed or apparent during that visit.

So, I would consider the visit important but PLEASE keep in mind that there's so much more to the Hyde story.  At the end of our visit we knew a fair amount about character education (Hyde style), the family component, the role of the seminars, the campus, etc.  However, here's a partial list of what we did not know after that visit (and what it took us some time to figure out).  At the end of the visit we did not know about the fact that:

-- Hyde accepts a huge percentage of kids with significant mental health and behavioral problems and does not have any mental health staff to deal with these issues

-- Hyde employs so many staff who have rocky personal and academic records

-- Hyde employs so many staff who are married to each other, former students, etc. (Hyde incest)

-- some Hyde staff engage in incredibly abusive verbal behavior toward some students and parents

-- the Hyde model doesn't take into serious consideration students' mental health issues when responding to students' emotional and behavioral struggles

-- the school has an unusually high attrition rate

-- a significant number of educational consultants refuse to refer students/families to Hyde because of their concern about Hyde's model

-- Joe Gauld (the founder) behaves VERY inappropriately, unprofessionally, and abusively at times (an extraordinarily poor role model who often doesn't live up to the Hyde values he recites)

-- students and parents will be expected to disclose very personal information about themselves to strangers, in seminar sessions, and will be confronted if they don't

-- seminars often become emotionally volatile and distressing to participants, and Hyde facilitators have little training or skill for handling these episodes

We didn't learn any of this until we were affiliated with Hyde for quite some time.  It took us quite a few visits (and seminars) to begin to get it.  So, yes you should visit.  But the visit provides only the headline, and barely that.