Treatment Abuse, Behavior Modification, Thought Reform > The Seed Discussion Forum

The Psychology of then and now...

<< < (2/2)

Stripe:
Sure.  I am in complete agreement with you.  I'm not looking for a diagnosis for me.  I've had pleanty of those over the years from doctors, psychologists, church do-gooders, Alanon - etc., you name it.  My point was this:  the whole psychiatric profession (and the insurance companies) now recognize most all of the problems that folks suffer as real, diagnoable and treatable issues. Therefore, it is entirely possible because the diagnostic and treatment criteria exist, it would be entirely possible to measure the occurrence of such problems in a given population.

What I'd like to review or participate in is an independent, controlled study that might be able to once and for all take people who went through that program, or other similar programs, and  show - OR no show- some difinitve correlation between the experience and the long-term effect.

As it is now, if I say the expereince was bad for me, except in a few instances, I am met responses such as - you would have been that way anyway; you're in denial (of my addiction I guess); it was a great place and you're ungrateful for the gifts.  I see it all the time.

Jupiter, I like your observations and I completely understand. It does take time to work it all through and accept the part I played in my own demise vis-a-vis the seed. Being put in the was not a voluntary thing for me, but taking on the training and accepting and embracing that I was a worthless, full of shit, lying human being, and professing the same, negating the existence of my sexual being and turing away from good people who never harmed me in order to just be able to go home, go to school, or get off the whole program - now that has taken it's toll on my soul for 'lo these many years.

And my parents, bless them, have watched me for years trying to come to some understanding -  waiting patiently for me to see the creative, loving kid they knew long before they put me in the seed, who was buried under all that I heaped on myself.

Obviously the experience wasn't the same for every person who walked through the doors, voluntarily or not. So perhaps others really were worthless, full of shit, lying human beings as they profess.  I hope not, but their perception of the experience does not invalidate mine any more than the other way around. But still, I seriously doubt any of them were all that bad.  No matter how negative a picture they paint of themselves.

Jupiter Survivor:
I guess there would be no conclusive answer to any study, I mean unless you send the same person in (have to use a time machine) with the same circumstances, no way to know for sure.  We are all so different, biologically, physically, emotionally and then you add in all the environmental factors, I don't know how you soul sort it out.  Then you would have to factor in the staff at the treatment, did they treat everyone the same, where they more willing to help hardcore addicts than those who were experimenting?

It's not like a double blind study where you can give someone a placebo and then take a few blood tests or answer a few questions.  Even the research on say Bipolar, is not conclusive.  Each person is different and most with that particular disease have overlapping symptoms of other mental health issues. It would be damn near impossible, anyone answering a study would be bias based on what their "perceived" was.  What if they were deluded and thought they were ok but still trying to please the staff?

I think the problems lies in perception.  You can have 100 people witness and event and literally get 100 different versions of the same event, and NO ONE is really wrong.  

Have you ever seen the study, I can't remember when it happened but was in a psy textbook I had, where a child was, at birth deprived of all human affection, they were fed, diapered, etc, but no playing, cuddling of human touch.  There was another one in which a dog was put in a caged area.  Every time he tried to step out of certain boundaries he was shocked.  He literally curled up in a ball and gave up.  

I am not sure what it is that makes some of us fight and some give up.  I complied for many years before I was able to fight.  I had some real depression bottled up inside, I believe to be environmental since I never took any meds.  I went to a therapist in my 30's, and after spending a month or so answering questions and talking about my life, she said basically said anyone who went through what I did would be crazy if they didn't think they were crazy....lol   Gotta love her technical terms!  All in all,  I can to terms with not being able to change the past or the people in it.  I could either turned into a hateful mean person, or be positive and draw some type of good from it.  Do not get me wrong, I would give anything NOT to have to have gone through what I did, but since that can't be changed I will not let it rule my life or let the hate fester inside of me.

Although I can vent some anger here on this board, it is not a reflection of my life.  It is merely my frustration of those in power taking advantage of someone weaker.  Holding accountable those who should have known better and looked the other way.

Navigation

[0] Message Index

[*] Previous page