Have a seat! DAUGHTER. Have I got a blue chair for you! Oh wait, only after you have been solidly degraded by several people your own age, and then 2-4 teens take you to a tiny bathroom where they strip your clothes off and look at your hiney! Ok, now have a seat. Sit there 3 days watching people flap their arms like chickens while covering you with their spit and sweat. Have some reddish brown mush with a few beans and fresh ashes in it! Eat it all in 5 minutes or we take it away! Or better yet, Force feed it to you. Well, it's getting dark now, by the way you'll be going home with some strangers parents, and neat the kid had just told in group earlier that her father had horribly, violently sexually abused her for years! It's ok though, he isnt allowed to have any contact with the newcommers.. Go ahead strip down in front of 3-5 teens again and get in that shower! make sure you wash fast, 30 seconds is all you get. Now it's the oldcommers turn, stand there with your hands inside the shower while she washes. Make sure you get the clean towel now, we all can see the skin rashes so many have. Yep, those are the same filty sheets the last newcommer slept on and yes! you will be sleeping 2 or more to a bed. Scabies anyone?
Ahh, day 2-3! Get into those strange filthy clothes! Your clothes didnt make it.No breakfast for you! After a long drive of sniffleing to yourself at the horendous place you've been abandoned at, the oldcommer is yelling at you "This is reaility, wake up" she then starts the whole car singing the "Tasty cake" song to you. Well, here we are at the warehouse, She heards you in physically holding onto you and her other newcommers. Stuffs you into a tiny room with 25-50 other sweaty, filthy teens. and More Nursery rymes! 2 long hours standing body against body in this tiny funk filled room. Off to group!
Flap!Flap!Flap! You must get called on. You stand up and cry "why have I been put here? I never did any drugs, I just ran away! Why am I here?" The staff calls on teens to verbally bash and assult you. " Your here because of your druggie whore ways! Without us you will die TOMORROW!" "You got yourself here, because your a slut and did anything to get more drugs!" You cry and cry and begin to speak again"why, I jus" Suddenly hands cover your mouth and More teens errupt from the group restraining your arms and covering your mouth. All the while some skin infected disgusting teen spits all over your face, yelling how dumb and sleezy you are. You sit back down terrified looking at the floor, when suddenly! teens are touching you, forcing your face foward. You push them away and mutter "leave me alone!" Then the sound comes, the sound of chairs scattering and blood you realize is comming from your head, your on the floor with 5-7 filthy skin infected teens sitting on your arms/legs and one or twon across your chest. YOU CAN"T BREATH!, your gasping, gasping for what you think will be your last breath. Hours pass, people are standing up ridiculing you. Standing up telling of horrific stories of how they were raped or had sex with animals or objects. and DRUGS made them do it. Finally it's time to go to the strangers house again. They let you up and you feel free, almost. Justthen your oldcommer whips you around forceing you to her parents car. Oops Mom couldn't come tonight it's DAD, Horrible Dad. You wonder if he will abuse you like he did his child just months before. It's ok though, Mom assured Straight he'd act right and it would be just this once he had to pick you all up.
Upstairs, time for that 30second shower again! Now which towel was yours.... Your stomach is aching now, it's been 5 days since you've had a BM, but tonight is not your lucky night, that time won't come for 2 weeks or more! Off to bed in those same filthy sheets. Since you had to use the bathroom in the middle of the night last night, the parents have put a bucket in the room for you to use from now on. You were a "misbehaver today, so You get to be forced to stand all night with 2 oldcommers yelling at you, don't slide down that wall now.. They will only force you back up. Exhusted, the parents knock at the door, it's time again to drive to the warehouse! Same clothes as yesterday.. No breakfast again..and you missed food at the building the night before because you were restrained on the floor.
You sit quietly on your hands counting the floor tiles... People forcing your head straight and trying to pry your arms from under you and make you flap!... But you don't want to speak at ALL. You shut down, sitting in your own sihlent HELL. The days go on... no school, no radio, no speaking at all to anyone for months..Being restrained at the staff/groups whim. It repeats day after day. You recieve NO education, no therapy, no nothing that can possibly help you. And that same bucket in your oldcommers room is still full of last night urine.. night after night.
You haven't spoken to your family for months, They are strangers. You have been DENIED to see an attorney or your parents time after time. your stuck, imprisoned in a horrible place, you know for certian you/no one belongs. You sit in silence for what seems like forever, being physically tortured whenever the staff/group needs someone to pick on.
****Go ahead, support this. You say you do. How can anyone stand by and let this occur to children? Sad, very sad. And you all wonder why many of us are so deeply effected... You supporters go ahead pretty it all up with program propaganda, but MY story is reality. This is what happens in some/many facilities. To support this is evil, pure evil. That was just some of what physically happened to me, I can't even begin to tell you how emotionally, spiritually, mentally tortueing it was. Did I mention this was my secret 14th Birthday present? They said they were taking me shopping....I still don't celebrate my Birthday 20 years later, infact I often cry the whole week.
Sorry that was so long, but when I think of people supporting any program with a potential to do this to another child, it sickens me.
[ This Message was edited by: Withdraw on 2005-10-15 14:14 ]