Treatment Abuse, Behavior Modification, Thought Reform > The Seed Discussion Forum

I was going to write Dear Greg, but even titles seem it be m

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landyh:

--- Quote ---On 2005-11-29 06:20:00, JaLong wrote:

"Landyh,

Thanks for the comments. It was very many years when the guy truely apologized. I had called him and told him how he had f'd up my life. He cried, I cried, and I forgave him. Yes, I'm sure we were the only ones there, except for his sister who was also on staff knew. I have some fond memories of the seed. Especially the friends I made there and still have. I have been re-united with more form this site. The way I look at it, I took what I needed from the seed to continue on with my life, and let the rest go. Yes, I needed counseling, and still do. Yet so is life. I really enjoyed going over to the GUY'S house down near Bayfront Hosp.

I feel we all go through trials in our lives, and as long as we learn something from them- that is all that matters.

Take care,

Julie"

--- End quote ---

Thank you also for your comments here. I have to say too that I did read in your posts that his apology while at the seed seemed to you to be insincere. Sounds like maybe he had reached the point of being ashamed which isn't quite the same as being sorry. It is hard for me to think of abusers as positive in anyway but I suppose if there still out there I would rather mine to have found there own healing. At the very least that they don't continue the same patterns of abuse to this day. I am so glad that you were able to confront at least one of your abusers though it is tough for me to sympathize with the fate of the other 4 guys.
Sounds like you found some healing there. I'm working on it. Cheers!

ChrisL:
The healing is in both sides; asking for and the act of forgiving...I recently reached out to someone by writing them a letter, asking for their forgiveness, even if I never hear from them, and I told them in my letter it was not neccesary, I still felt better, somehow in someway by giving up that old grudge, defense, resentment, whatever you want to call it, I felt better inside (& not just a relief of guilt, because I really had nothing to feel guilty about) I felt that by asking for forgiveness I had also forgiven them...after 25 years...

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