Treatment Abuse, Behavior Modification, Thought Reform > World Wide Association of Specialty Programs and Schools (WWASPS)
Wisdom Ranch School
Anonymous:
This isnt the best metaphor but Im trying... I can understand the situation that jellybean is in. JB has tried a lot of different things to address the childs negative behaviors.
Here goes...
My cars acting up. I try to troubleshoot with the basic info that I have about cars. Car doesnt get better, is getting a little worse. So I go to the library and check out some books. Try a couple different things and still no luck. So I make some phone calls and collect more info. The guys on the phone try to help but its hard to problem solve on the phone. Can I possibly bring the car in? Yeah, we might have to keep it for a while. And it might be expensive to fix. Im wondering if maybe a mechanic might come out to the house and fix it or maybe teach ME how to fix it?
I dont have the skills/tools to fix the car. Can I find someone to teach me how? Possibly, but how do I know the guy willing to teach knows what hes doing? The one-on-one instructor situation is rare - in just about everything from auto mechanics to bread baking. Its out there but hard to find. Or you can battle it out with books and manuals. My point is that yes, its a great suggestion to go off on a vacation with the children and raise them yourself but parents out there are admitting they need more tools. I dont know what the solution is but parents like jellybean are trying. This website for the most part condemns programs but I dont see much in the way of creative thinking to come up with options.
Antigen:
Yes, but we're not talking about complicated machines designed and built by automobile experts (under directive from unions, regulators, et al) We're talking about a boy; a young human manufactured in mind and body by people. Human beings and other creatures on this planet have been raising our offspring w/o professional help for millenea. You want to look at examples of civilizations that gave over that profound responsibility to the pros?
Ok, Uncle Joe subjected all citizens of the USSR to his government shrinks. How'd that work out for him? Following that model, Fidel has brought about an impressive child rearing machine in Cuba. Ask a Cuban about Fidel's much vaunted free public education, including mandatory rural boarding school for city kids. It's easy to find someone w/ firsthand experience of that. Just go to Miami and ask the first person you meet who has a strong Cuban accent. It'll probably be the first person you meet. Then there's Hitler Youth. All good intentions aside (and I do believe most Germans had the best of intentions in the beginning of that nightmare), how did that work out for them?
Nobody, not the cops or teachers or shrinks, let alone self declared troubled teen experts, knows this kid or will ever care nearly as much about him as his mother, his old friends and solid family. Nobody. Bar none. Shit, you won't even remember this lady's screen name or situation even 10 years from now. But the man will still be her son.
It will be generally found that those who sneer habitually at human nature and affect to despise it, are among its worst and least pleasant examples
--Charles Dickens
--- End quote ---
Shortbus:
I too dont agree with removing children en masse from the family home. I do feel that there can be some benefits found in removing a child from an unsafe home environment. As with everything, there are exceptions. I have had friends that have had to live with the knowledge that their mother had wished they had never been born. And Ive had numerous students that have told me the same thing. What kind of parent looks a child in the eye and tells them they wish they had never gotten pregnant???? Is home a good, safe place for that child? Through history there have been children raised by others, I think the apprentice system was set up like that. When your parents couldnt afford another mouth to feed you were sent off and raised by someone else. You worked for your food but you had a place. I dont necessarily agree with any of these practices, but any of these might be better than the situation the child is in.... Just a mile a way from my home - in an affluent part of St. Paul, Minnesota the cops found a dog kennel in the basement where the parents would lock up their daughter when she was misbehaving.... this childs parents are nutbags and shouldnt be allowed to raise their kids. They are better off in someone elses hands.
Anonymous:
--- Quote ---On 2005-09-05 06:51:00, Anonymous wrote:
"I dont have the skills/tools to fix the car. Can I find someone to teach me how? "
--- End quote ---
I wouldn't go looking to WWASP for help with this one. David Gilcrease, a software engineer is the one who developed all of their 'tools' in the seminars. I have been through them, and they are the most ridiculous, laughable scam I've personally come across. It isn't so funny when you are locked up and forced to go though, not funny at all. What's funny is to realize what idiots your parents really are, after a few years of reflection. The craziest people are the ones who buy into it. It's not therapy, it's not tools, it's nothing. Not sure how to explain it other than a scam. That's all it is.
Nonconformistlaw:
Shortbus, your right about how bad some parents are, that kids need to be as far away from them as possible. I've seen a lot of cases where parents are shockingly abusive to their kids.
But on the other hand, many parents do not fall into that category. My dad for example, is a decent person, who really tried the best he could and was at his wits end with me....But I think with him he overreacted to my problems and Straight preyed on his worst fears as a parent (that I might end up dead, in jail or insane without the program).
So I guess I think many parents are truely desperate to find a solution and programs convince them that their program offers an immediate instant cure. Since when are human probelms solved by miraculous quick fixes????
I have a feeling parents fall into 3 very general categories...1) abusive, 2) good parents who are just desparate for a solution and want to do the right thing, and 3) parents who just dont want to deal with the "problem child" anymore so dump them into a program to do their work for them.
What is sad to me is the good parents that are really trying to do the right thing have difficulty in finding the right solution...and with all the misleading program advertising...it really doesnt surprise me how very well meaning parents get sucked in to the scam...and with all the programs out there....I can imagine how difficult it might be to distinguish a good one from a bad one because all programs paint very pretty pictures of the "amazing" results their program "guarantees." Its sad that there are so few decent options for parents, when extreme options are truly needed that is.
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