Whoever is writing this seems like they want an argument. Specifically, a reason to get into a nasty back and forth, which is personally what I think this website has become. It all seems to come down to "those who support it" and those "who dont" and I am making this assertion because of your pointed comment to Besty regarding this topic. Why hasn't Betsy responded? I don't know... But I would venture to guess it's because most of her posts are attacked. Point being, I am an advocate of MMS as well. And my response to your post is not for an argument, but for clarification from anothers perspective. And the first thing I am wondering is are you a student? It seems like you might be an outsider that is forming opinions based on those posts made by girls who had a negative experience at MMS. So please clarify that to help me understand better. (And if you are a student, my apology to you for the assumption).
As a sidenote, I am friends with girls who had negative experiences at MMS. I am empathetic towards their bad experience, just as they are willing to accept the fact that I had a good experience. So, to clarify, I AM NOT discounting those girls who had bad experiences. For some people MMS was just not meant to be and its unfortunate that they had to suffer 1-2+ years of their life there going untreated. My hearts are with you girls, for those of you who know who I am, you know that I support you fully.
Now onto the arguable topic that you are so desperate to have someone respond to...... I never had sex before MMS. I had made out with one guy. So my sexual history was of very little interest, except for the part that I masturbated. Like, a lot. And John never made me divulge in this part of my history. Do you know who did though? Some of the girls I was there with. One girl called me out in group about it, and even went as far as to call me a "sex addict" because I masturbated so much. That was pretty funny to me. If I moved the wrong way in my bunk, my bunkmate would be like "are you masturbating?!?!" as if it was a bad thing. And then they would call me out in group, or say something about it during my therapy time after my call with my parents. Anyway, I digress. So do I think John is a pervert? Absoloutly not. No way, never, uh-uh. And like you, I will never agreee or even entertain the thought that he was. I dont like to make assumptions about people that were there, so I guess I don't know what it was like for someone to share with their parents the intimate details of the 1-40 people they may have slept with. But I know what it has been like for me to share those details with my parents today, and in all honesty, it has helped.
In my current life, I have slept with people, had sex, I masturbated god forbid!!! One of those experiences I had though was extremely negative and painful for me: i was raped. And I told my parents. And it helped. My dad pays for my birth control; my mom and I talk about sex, or people I've slept with. When I was in high school, post MMS, I found out that I had cervical cancer. My parents were there for me through treatment and never made me feel bad; they only helped. Had all this occured before going to MMS, and I had shared it with my parents while John was sitting across his desk reading my history, I would have felt just as nervous and sad about it as I did when I did it on my own. Not because John was there, but because thats hard for anyone to look into the faces of their parents and tell them. in some ways, I was have felt more comforted knowing I had someone that I trusted and cared about- John- to listen to me without my parents. Someone who I could just fall apart to and someone who would give me advice. I was never that close with John while I was at MMS; I was personally much closer with Gary. But since leaving the school, I have maintained a very close relationship with John and Colleen and I speak/email with them close to 2-3 times a month.
I sat with girls during their histories. I can remember their names, their calls, their histories... And to be specific, I was a phone call partner for 5 girls during their history sharing. And John never got all creepy and googly eyed... His breathing didn't increase and he didnt get all excited and touch himself. He asked honest questions and led the girls through the sharing of a painful part of their lives with their parents. He was honest and helpful. He was understanding and supportive. Was he a dickhead sometimes? Yes. He was an asshole to me during that process, but he wasn't a pervert. He is not a pervert. Someone said "god help his children. I pray for them." Or something like that. My response? God bless his children for they are lucky to have a good hearted and caring father. And I apologize to those of you this may offend since I know you don't like John, but my whole point is not how great John is, but that he is not a sick pervert. Never was, never will be. Signed, NO NAME (I don't need an argument... The back and forth gives me a headache and I know the girls who I keep in touch with love me, despite the differences in our experiences).
